"There is no team like the best team, which is our team right here! We will show you, we're the best team of the very little league this year!" (from You're A Good Man, Charlie Brown)
Here's how the draft washed out. I made one mistake in that I totally forgot Jordan Schroeder was still available when I had my first pick; and I accidentally picked Ben Blood even though he sucks, but that was only because I had him graded a D but color-coded orange, which was the color for Bs. Eek. I dropped him immediately after the draft and replaced him with Drew Akins. We drafted 7th out of 7.
TEAM COUGARS:
Brady Hjelle, UMD
Patrick Wiercioch, DU
Joe Colborne, DU
Jack Connolly, UMD
Dylan Olsen, UMD
Mike Louwerse, MSUM
Brett Olson, MTU
Nick Leddy, UMTC
Tommy Grant, UAA
Drew Akins, UMD
William Wrenn, DU
Austin Lee, MSUM
Michael Davies, UW
Kane Lafranchise, UAA
Malcolm Gwilliam, MTU
Jordy Murray, UW
Here are the other guys, in draft order. I won't reveal their identities, though they are free to identify themselves.
#1
Marc Cheverie, DU
Garrett Raboin, SCSU
Garrett Roe, SCSU
Kael Mouillierat, MSUM
Brendan Smith, UW
Drew Shore, DU
Luke Salazar, DU
Jake Marto, UND
Billy Sweatt, CC
Ben Street, UW
Matt Donovan, DU
Kevin Murdock, MSUM
Brett Bennett, UW
Craig Smith, UW
Jared Festler, SCSU
Lee Baldwin, UAA
#2
Brad Eidsness, UND
Ryan Lasch, SCSU
Cade Fairchild, UMTC
Jay Barriball, UMTC
Blake Geoffrion, UW
Danny Kristo, UND
Deron Cousens, MTU
Dan Dunn, SCSU
Zach Budish, UMTC
Rylan Galiardi, MSUM
Jacob Cepis, UMTC
Joe Howe, CC
Justin Schultz, UW
Paul Phillips, DU
Rylan Schwartz, CC
Seth Helgeson, UMTC
#3
Alex Kangas, UMTC
Justin Fontaine, UMD
Rhett Rakhshani, DU
Mike Connolly, UMD
Kevin Clark, UAA
Jake Gardiner, UW
Gabe Guentzel, CC
Aaron Marvin, SCSU
Geoff Irwin, MSUM
David Fischer, UMTC
Jordy Christian, SCSU
Kris Fredheim, CC
Andy Bohmbach, UW
Nils Backstrom, UAA
Kent Patterson, UMTC
Josh Lunden, UAA
#4
Mike Lee, SCSU
Anthony Maiani, DU
Kurt Davis, MSUM
Derek Stepan, UW
Jason Gregoire, UND
Ryan McDonagh, UW
Brett Hextall, UND
Jordan Baker, MTU
Curtis Leinweber, UAA
Mike Cichy, UND
Ben Hanowski, SCSU
Nate Prosser, CC
Jon Olthius, UAA
David Toews, UND
Nicholas Rioux, SCSU
Mario Lamoureaux, UND
#5
Bryce Christianson, UAA
Jordan Schroeder, UMTC
Chay Genoway, UND
Tony Lucia, UMTC
Aaron Ness, UMTC
Mike Hoeffel, UMTC
Kyle Ostrow, DU
Drew Dobson, MTU
John Mitchell, UW
Jordan Fulton, UMD
Stephen Schultz, CC
Sam Lofquist, UMTC
Trevor Hunt, UAA
Ben Grotting, UW
Brad Malone, UND
Jesse Martin, DU
#6
Tyler O'brien, CC
Chris VandeVelde, UND
Ryan Flynn, UMTC
Tyler Ruegsegger, DU
Darcy Zajac, UND
Patrick Johnson, UW
Zach Harrison, MSUM
Brandon Vossberg, DU
Mike Testwuide, CC
Andy Sackrison, MSUM
Corey Fienhage, UND
Channing Boe, MSUM
Derrick Lapoint, UND
Andreas Vlassopoulos, CC
Evan Trupp, UND
Joe Gleason, UND
TEAM COUGARS for the win!
Drew Akins - 1:1
Drew's pretty a shoo-in for some sort of leadership role, and I'm pretty sure it would be the C. Drew stands up for his teammates, which sometimes gets him in a little bit of trouble, but at least he doesn't have rage blackouts like Zach Jones or attack mascots like Joe Finley; he regains control easily. He's won the heart of MeanEgirl, and a whole slew of creeps at USCHO can attest that is no easy task.
Jordan Fulton - 18:1
Jordy's a senior, which certainly gives him an advantage, but I'm not sure. Rumors swirling that he might bolt for Calgary early have so far been incorrect, but they might affect the locker room's vote.
Mike Montgomery - 50:1
Monty crossed over from foward to defenceman seamlessly, showing he was willing to do what the team needed. If he continues to show the defensive prowess he had last season, he'll take on a leadership role as a senior. This year? I doubt it.
Then the 2nd period started, and tDogs remained on the PK, and Chad Rau, helped by the Traitor and Daddy's Boy, had one of those just-after-the-power-play goals that sucks to give up but at least it doesn't hurt the PK stats! That one was kind of tough. I thought maybe CC was going to get out of their little funk and take off. Well, the joke was on me, because 19 seconds later, Justin to Jacky to Jordy and *boom* 2-1. A minute and 26 seconds later, some jerk took a penalty and Justin Fontaine, always the darling, thought "Poor MeanEgirl. She's been having a really tough time lately. How can I help her out?" and then the puck was in the net again. Monty and Palm assisted. Thanks guys!
The homeless person scored again, assisted by Imitation Connelly and Chad Rau to make it 3-2, and at this point I realized this game was going to be high-scoring. I knew tDogs weren't out of it but I also believed the Tigers would not go quietly into that good night. Mike "I Might Be Sexy But I'm Uggo Because I Think Kneeing Is Ok" Testwuide took a penalty for, well, duh, and then Ryan Lowery, Public Enemy Number One, flattened poor MacGregor Sharp into the boards and received some lovely parting gifts as he was asked to leave the arena. During the ensuing 5 on 3, Evan "Stop Calling Me Ryan You Illiterate CC Announcer" Oberg scored on assists from Meyers and Fuzzy. Back to even. Sharpy was on the ice for that as well, so he was all right despite getting clobbered by He Who Is About To Die, and then that sneaky Sharpshooter decided he was going to show Richard Bachman who was the man and who was the very little boy, and shot a laser-guided missile into the roof of the net, his sleight of hand fooling all but that wily goal judge, who saw it all the way and lit that lamp like a beacon of hope unto us all. And we had our first lead of the weekend, and our first lead on CC since (pause for me to look it up) we crapped away a 2-0 game in the 3rd period in January 2007.
But they weren't done! Nick Kemp was all "I'm sick of being On Notice!" and I said "I think so, Nick!" and despite CC's attempts to hook Sharpy, he got it to Nick and Nick took it to the house. 5 goals in a period. God. Remember when we couldn't get 5 goals in a weekend? Remember when the 2nd period was a black hole of horrendous defence? Those days are over now!
CC then went back to their locker room and cried like Dude Love when he found out crazytechfan was 16.
I guess Bachman was inconsolable, because to start the 3rd period, Drew O'Connell was in net. I don't really like him, mostly because his name is just one letter away from this guy who was really horrible to me back when I was in ROTC. Screw him. Drew also gave us our most recent win against CC, also in January 2007, in a game where Josh Meyers got a powerplay goal simply by gaining the red line and dumping the puck in the offensive zone. Jeff McFarland scored the GWG in that game, too, if you can believe it. So, this is a really long way of saying Drew O'Connell is a great big sieve, doo-dah, doo-dah. Jordy Fulton agreed, because he scored about 4 minutes into the period to make it 6-3. Arthur Fonzarelli had the only assist, but I'm sure Jacky was just as helpful in setting up the play. Some dumb loser from CC must have gotten a stick on the puck for a second or two there. Sharpshooter had a penalty and Al took a stab at a goal on a clearing attempt, but it was way wide. Tragic. Daddy's Boy scored on that power play, assisted by the homeless person and the Traitor. It was their only ppg of the weekend, so I guess they can get a nice little gold star. Kyle Schmidt got in on the scoring as well, getting his 2nd goal of the year and effectively putting the last nail in the coffin for those tigers. I know they are endangered species so I certainly hope Kyle doesn't get in trouble for poaching. I doubt it, he is one smooth criminal.
I'm tired. There will be more tomorrow. This thing took me forever to write because I'm effectively a zombie. Thanks for the great game, guys! Have a safe trip home! I know you're going to be dragging your tired butts out of bed in about 2 1/2 hours. Yikes.
The Numbers
Wins until we equal last season's total: 5! (WOW!!!!!!!!!!!)
Points until we equal last season's total: 11! (GLORIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!)
My Guys
MacGregor Sharp: 18!
Jack Connolly: 12!
Michael Gergen: 7
Rob Bordson: 0
Freshmen
Mike Connolly: 13!
Jack Connolly: 12!
David Grun: 0
Scott Kishel: 0
Brady Lamb: 0
Travis Oleksuk: 0
On Notice:
Rob Bordson
Andrew Carroll
Jay Cascalenda
Matt Greer
Alex Stalock
Goals Only
Drew Akins
Jack Connolly
Cody Danberg
Mike Montgomery
Trent Palm
Well, folks, I know that we've got our first WCHA series coming up next weekend. It's at UAA, where we often struggle. This is going to be a real test.
Now, I know I've said that this year is going to be different in so many ways. And I got advanced copy of some video that shows me just how serious our guys are about making this the best season we've had in years. They've been training all summer to get prepped for this series so we can start out 2-0 in the WCHA.
No one was more serious than tUMD's resident badass, Drew Akins.
This will give you an idea of some of the training measures Drew undertook in order to be prepared for what will be his breakout season.
Here, Drew is setting out to do what we call the Duluth Rodeo, which involves lassoing ships anchored off-shore and hauling them into port.
Here he is preparing to gnaw through a telephone pole. This way if someone knocks off his helmet his teeth will be tough enough to chew through bone. I wish he'd wear more safety gear, though.
This is Drew's haul from the Duluth Rodeo. These boats were full of salmon and he ate it all.
After singlehandedly building and erecting this oil derrick, Drew has tapped an oil deposit rich enough to fuel the entire country until we can figure out how to wean ourselves off of petroleum products. He's about to do some pullups, or maybe bend some of the girders with his bare hands. I won't say which.
Not everything about this training exercise has been grunt work. Drew also honed his concentration and finishing skills by making this nice boat.
Here he is with Jordan Fulton testing out his new creation in the icy waters off the Alaskan coast.
Some of his teammates joined him on his quest to prove himself more efficient than a steam-powered drill. Drew Akins is a steel-drivin' man. I should mention that being on television adds 10 pounds, but in their case it was added exclusively to their heads. First person to guess correctly all 6 of the guys in the background gets a free beer of their choice at the Curling Club during the Wisconsin series in November.
Based on all the hard work Drew's been putting in, plus his new role on the power play and his general badass characteristics, I foresee great things this coming weekend. 4 points, boys!
tUMD 6, WMU 5
My friends, I'm really struggling tonight. I know that I say this every time, but I'm very tired and yet my night is still not over. I am venturing over to Suptown for a night of debauchery... if my temporary roommates ever come home.
I am tired for numerous reasons, partly because I slept like crap last night and was hung over all day today (I've turned into a lightweight again, all my years of training down the drain!), but mostly because that game was emotionally draining. And physically, because anyone who has ever watched a game with me knows that 1. I scream and 2. I am always flailing or jumping or writhing.
I sat in the same seats I did last night, only DHG et. al. were not present as they all had other commitments. I had plans to sit with a few other tPBers who have their tickets in the same area, BUT I spent the first 10 minutes of the game alone, nearly surrounded by teenagers. Evidently Section 25 is the teenager section? USAFA Bulldog kindly came and sat with me for the first period, which was necessary for certain reasons which I will outline below. Eventually the stragglers showed up during the 2nd period, and all was well. I was concerned that maybe there was a pumpkin-carving emergency, as that had kept them away from the game the previous evening.
I got to the game really early because I had nothing else to do. I'd driven back from Gooseberry and it was already 5:50 so I just headed over to the game. I read my program and texted and took 800000000 photos of Jack Connolly during warm ups. I wonder if he sensed it. He has kind of a neat little way of shooting the puck during warm-ups, with a funny stick lift and glide combo after he sends it to the net.
As an aside, I wish the program was a little more interesting. I don't know exactly how that would be accomplished, but it would be nice. Maybe they could ask me to write something. But, while it would be gloriously entertaining for you all, it would still be boring for me, since I would already know the content.
I know that B2 was crappity crap and not available and the radio feed is all kinds of jacked up, so why don't I walk you through all the scoring? This will be fun for me. At the Curling Club tonight someone was asking me how I remember all the stuff to blog about, and I had to inform him that my blog isn't very factual, rather it is more anecdotal. Sometimes I think I should change that, but really, that's my niche. I will leave all that boring stuff to Kevin Pates while I have all the fun. Something tells me he wouldn't be interested in talking about hotties, but then again who am I to assume anything? Maybe he'd be into it.
This might take awhile.
WMU 1 - 0 6x5 PP Greg Squires (2) (Kevin Connauton, Tyler Ludwig)
This goal came after Nick Kemp took a very unsmart penalty. We've had a lot of 5x3s to kill lately and it was only a matter of time before we gave one up. Our PK has really been struggling lately. Partially because we're taking penalties while we're on the power play!
MND 1 - 1 6x6 Jack Connolly (1) (Michael Gergen, Justin Fontaine)
Thank goodness that USAFA Bulldog was sitting with me. If my sweet Jacky had scored a goal and I'd been sitting alone, I wouldn't have been able to celebrate. I already looked like some kind of a crazy person sitting alone at a game. It was a great goal that almost looked like it wasn't going to happen. Brad was like "I didn't think he was going to get to that puck." I was 100% certain it was Jacky who scored until he wasn't the guy who led the celebratory high five line so I was confused and I was screaming "WAS IT JACK? WAS IT JACK?" and jumping around and hugging Brad.
WMU 2 - 1 6x5 PP Derek Roehl (1) (Tyler Ludwig, Patrick Galivan)
This goal depressed me because Jacky was in the penalty box when it was scored. Like he would ever commit a penalty!!!
WMU 3 - 1 6x6 Derek Roehl (2) (unassisted) 10:47
I missed this goal because the students were chanting "Beer Song! Beer Song!" and the idiot high school children behind us were chanting (not loudly) "Beer Sucks! Beer Sucks!" and Sando and I were both turned around staring at them in bewilderment.
MND 2 - 3 6x4 PP Evan Oberg (1) (Justin Fontaine) 0:45
We missed this goal because we were in the Curling Club and I miscalculated by like 5 minutes how much time we had left. I would have been depressed if we'd come back and it had been still 3-1.
MND 3 - 3 5x6 SH Andrew Carroll (1) (Evan Oberg, Cody Danberg) 5:05
GLORIOUSLY AMAZING! We were jubilant at this goal. It was such a random combination of people, too. Carroll from Oberg? What? It's like McFarland from Curry or something, back in the day. Although not quite to that extent.
MND 4 - 3 6x5 PP Mike Connolly (2) (MacGregor Sharp, Jordan Fulton) 8:23
The guy next to me said "There it is" about a second before the goal went it. Mike Connolly is SUCH a PLAYMAKER.
WMU 4 - 4 5x6 SH Ryan Watson (1) (unassisted) 17:27
This goal had me practically slitting my wrists. Stalock just gave the guy the puck and was like "Here, please score on me." I mean, that was how bad it was. Stalock was in the corner and passed it right behind the net to this Ryan Watson character.
MND 5 - 4 6x6 Jordan Fulton (2) (Andrew Carroll) 18:30
I don't remember what actually occurred on this goal, but I just remember rejoicing and thinking *boom* we've got this in the bag.
WMU 5 - 5 6x6 EA Patrick Galivan (2) (unassisted)
tDogs were in the Broncos's zone trying for the empty-netter, but it wasn't a clean breakaway like the night before. Somebody missed the net and then someone else missed the puck and this Galivan fellow took the puck up ice and put it in the net somehow. I don't mean somehow as in it was a miracle, I mean somehow as in it was at the far end of the net and I didn't see.
MND 6 - 5 6x6 GW LL MacGregor Sharp (4) (Evan Oberg)
I didn't even know it was Sharpy who scored the goal, I just know it went in and the goal light went on and my life was complete.
We played well at times and we played poorly at times, but don't think that this game was 6-5 because we're bad. The Broncos came to play and they did not let up. They made some great plays, especially their 5th I wish them ALL THE BEST in the CCHA because we need their help in the pairwise.
WE SCORED 11 GOALS THIS WEEKEND, PEOPLE. Last year, down 3-1 going into the 3rd period, I wouldn't have had much faith (we did win 4-3 OT against Kato that one time though), but we just kept coming at them and we were RELENTLESS. Congratulations on the sweep guys! I'm so thrilled!!!!
One of my temporary roommates just said he didn't trust someone whose teeth were too white and too chiseled, that she doesn't eat food, she eats souls. I said I didn't think someone who ate souls would have white teeth, but that I'd never contemplated that. He said "You should blog about that!" and here we are.
The Numbers
Wins until we equal last season's total: 9 (STILL non-conference)
Points until we equal last season's total: 23 (STILL ditto)
My Guys
MacGregor Sharp: 7! (OTGWG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU MACGREGOR!!!!!)
Jack Connolly: 4! (JACKY SCORED A GOAL!!! I WAS SO EXCITED!!!)
Michael Gergen: 2! (ANOTHER ASSIST!)
Rob Bordson: 0 (Come on, sweetie, I want to see a goal! I know you'll do it soon.)
Freshmen
Mike Connolly: 6!
Jack Connolly: 4!
Scott Kishel: 0
Brady Lamb: 0
Travis Oleksuk: 0
David Grun: 0 (But played in his first game! And he's wearing a great number, too.)
On Notice (first time I've had to do it all year):
Rob Bordson
Trent Palm
Goals Only
Jay Cascalenda
Michael Gergen
It's so short! Last year my first On Notice had 7 guys and Goals Only had 2 guys. What this means is Balanced Scoring and LOTS OF IT.
The outlook wasn't brilliant for the Bulldog six that day,
The score stood two to two, with but sixteen minutes to play.
And then when Fulton fanned a shot, and Gergen did the same,
A pall-like silence fell upon the patrons of the game.
A straggling few got up to go in deep despair.
The rest clung to that hope which springs eternal in the human breast.
They thought, "If only the Bulldogs could get themselves reset.
We'd put up even money now, if Raymond hit the net."
Akins seemed a bit lost, without linemate Curry;
And Kemper, who was a wrecker, took a sketchy penalty
So upon that stricken multitude, grim melancholy set;
for there seemed but little chance of anyone hitting the net.
But Gergen let drive some good shots, to the wonderment of all.
And Fulton tried a wraparound, but none would get the call.
And when the whistle blew, and men saw what had occurred,
there was nothing in the net, except Bobby Goepfert.
Then from five thousand throats and more there rose a lusty yell;
it rumbled through the valley, it rattled in the dell;
it pounded through on the mountain and recoiled upon the plain;
for the Bulldogs, mighty Bulldogs, were refusing to be slain.
There was ease in McKnight's manner as he stepped into his place,
there was pride in Carroll's bearing and a smile lit Nisky's face.
And when, among the many cheers, the face-off match was set,
no stranger in the crowd could doubt tDogs would hit the net.
Ten thousand eyes were on them as they skated up the ice.
Five thousand tongues applauded, cause Johnson's saves were nice.
Then, while the writhing Goepfert was flopping on the ground,
the Bulldogs all dug at it, but no one could get it 'round.
And now the rubber cylinder came hurtling through the air,
and Johnson stood a-watching it in haughty grandeur there.
Shot by the sturdy Husky the puck unheeded sped --
"That ain't my style," said Johnson.
"No goal!" Jon Campion said.
From the benches, maroon and gold, there went up a muffled roar,
like the beating of the storm waves on a stern and distant shore.
"Kill him! Kill the umpire!" shouted someone (probably the Bob),
and it's likely they'd have killed him had not replay done its job.
With a smile of certain victory, each Bulldog's visage shone,
they stilled the rising tumult, they bade the game go on.
At a signal from the referee, the linesman dropped the puck,
the goal horn blasted loudly, but Jon Campion said, "No luck!"
"Fraud!" cried the maddened Huskies, and their fans answered "Fraud!"
But at scornful looks from Bulldogs, the audience was awed.
They saw each face grow stern and cold, they saw the muscles strain,
and they knew that Johnson wouldn't let that puck go by again.
The sneer has fled from Fulton's lip, the teeth are clenched in hate.
He enters the faceoff circle, against a guy named Nate.
And now the linesman holds the puck, and now he lets it go,
and now the air is shattered by the force of Nodl's blow.
Oh, somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright.
The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light.
And, somewhere men are laughing, and little children shout,
but there is no joy in Mudville -- the mighty Bulldogs got knocked out.
*this poem is an adaptation of "Casey at the Bat" by Ernest L. Thayer
I know, it was pretty pathetic of me to cop out last night and only post the Numbers. I know you were all dying to hear about my trip to Duluth to see my beloved Bulldogs, and all I gave you was some simple math. You probably thought, Come on, a chimpanzee could have posted that. But come on, people. You know that chimpanzees are too busy posting on this site to bother with a RWD update.
Do you all remember the scene in Wayne's World where they try to go backstage at Alice Cooper and end up outside talking to Chris Farley about Frankie Sharp's talent search? Chris Farley says (with hand gestures to show an imaginary U.S. map) "Next stop is St. Louis, then he's going to come back through Chicago on his way to Detroit." If you don't remember that, you haven't watched one of the GREATEST MOVIES EVER enough times. But anyway, that was sort of how our trip started out. RWD World Headquarters is located in Plymouth (western suburb). Navigational Guru/Duluth Refugee Kleiner lives in a northeastern suburb about 25 miles away. After I swung by to get NG/DR Kleiner (and oohed and aahed over the very cute, very sweet Babykleiner), we were ready to head out. Or so we thought...
As we were leaving the Kleiner Compound, I received an emergency phone call from former Gauntlet Victim/Closet Bulldog Fan Fire Helmet Guy, needing us to rescue him from the ghettos of the northwest suburbs. So Kleiner and I strapped on our bulletproof vests, loaded our AK-47s, and sped across town. After a near-death experience involving a jerk in an Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme on 694, we made it. Kleiner provided cover fire while FHG sprinted to my car from a nearby bombed-out building. Fortunately, he has lots of practice from the DECC to Sports Garden run.
After a stopover in the far northern suburbs to pick up our tickets from an Anonymous Donor, and then another stop to feed my hungry car, we were finally on our way. FINALLY.
But! The important part isn't the journey, it's the destination. We rolled into Duluth in time to booze it at the Curling Club with some members of tPB. We drank Canadian beer in honor of our Crazy Canuck. Yuck. I think I'll stick to my Leinie's Red from now on.
However, if not for Canadians, we would not have won the game. Biggie Mac scored 2 goals (including a sweet power play goal set up by 2 other Canadians) and Mason Raymond had an empty net goal. Jordan Fulton scored just for FHG, as if he was saying "Okposo who?"
Mike Curry was sadly absent from the scoreboard, but he did get in some guy's face and also told Derek Shepherd what he thought of some call or another. It's really entertaining to see all the little things he does to get under an opponent's skin.
The goals per game average has gone up, since tDogs failed to get the required 7 goals last night. Now they have to score 8 1/2 goals each night in Denver. Totally possible!
All right, that's enough. RWD out.
