Silent Spring

Huh, how about that? Nearly a month has gone by since our lives were made complete.

Let's wrap up a few things.

First, College Hockey Armageddon appears to have passed us by. Scary Princeton Coach is going to go to Nouveau Riche University instead of our coach, who somehow still does not have a contract. Dear Bob, get it done or I am not sending you ANY MONIES. Michigan Tech has a new coach, too. Some Michigan person. Clearly he's trading up by going to the WCHA.

RWD awards for the season:

My Guy of the year is Jack Connolly, for the second year in a row.

Freshman of the year is JT Brown, though Justin Faulk was breathing down his neck.

Jacky is also the Connolly Champion, though with Mike gone he will not be able to defend his title.

Drew Olson wins the penalty title over Dan DeLisle, which was uninteresting as neither took a boatload of penalties.

Seniors Trent Palm, Kyle Schmidt, Mike Montgomery, Chad Huttel and Justin Fontaine leave us. Thank you for your fierce and unwavering commitment to the program, for making it better than when you arrived, and for giving us your very best no matter what was asked of you. Palm played on one leg. Schmidt had hand surgery days before scoring the game winning goal against Michigan. Montgomery and Fontaine gave up pro opportunities to return to school. Huttel stuck with the program despite limited playing time.

Thanks to your families as well; all five of you have families who were vocal and visible in their support for you and for the program. I didn't go to a single road game without seeing at least one Palm, Schmidt, Montgomery, Huttel or Fontaine in the crowd. Sometimes even wearing a gorilla suit or a blonde wig, making candy for fellow fans, or buying beers for rowdy road-trippers.

I'm contemplating a site re-design but haven't seen anything I liked yet. Don't worry, it won't become busy or overloaded with ads or scripts that crash your browsers, it will still be as spartan as ever. At the very least I will be doing a new banner for the off-season.

Posting will be sporadic throughout the summer, as always. I might have some other stuff to say about the season, and of course there's the All-Hottie team, and I'm trying to get tickets to the draft. I'll tweet if I update and try to keep you informed of any exciting and fun news going on in the world of Bulldog hockey.

Thanks again for reading, for your comments and your emails and tweets. Thank you for the sense of community you all provide, as Bulldog fans or as hockey fans in general. In the seven seasons I've been writing this site, I've never once wanted to shut the site down; it is always fun and the connections I've made as a result of writing are priceless. What you folks say makes me laugh, makes me think and humbles me. Victories are sweeter and losses are easier to bear when we celebrate and suffer together.

A Dish Best Served Cold

tUMD 4, SCCC 2
tUMD 3, SCCC 2 (3OT)

On 11 March, 2007, freshman defenceman Trent Palm was on the bench when Andreas Nodl ended tUMD's season at 11:33 of the 3rd overtime. Senior Josh Johnson made 62 saves in his last game as a Bulldog. There wasn't a single Bulldog player, staffer or fan who wasn't absolutely devastated by that loss.

And last night, two freshmen defencemen for St. Cloud were in the locker room getting IVs to rehydrate, one after cramping up on ice and crawling off after being trapped out there while tUMD maintained possession of the puck. Mike Lee made 60 saves before Mike Connolly finally got the puck past him and ended SCSU's season. I doubt there were any Husky players, staffers or fans who were not absolutely devastated.

We know how you feel. Really, we do.

And now we know what it's like to feel the ecstatic relief of a triple-overtime win. Since the student section numbers were down, I decided I'd stand with them and make some noise. I was missing my nice, padded, comfy chair in 216 after awhile, but those nice long bleachers are perfect for lying on for a quick rest at intermission. Oh yes, there were five intermissions. Five. They had the Duluth East - Eden Prairie game on between periods, which caused me even more stress, and then when East lost I was terrified the Bulldogs were going to suffer the same letdown.

The Bulldog defence wasn't going to let that happen. Mike Connolly put the puck in the net, but the defence won the game. St. Cloud's only goals came from a power play and a scrum around the net. Drew Olson somehow stopped a breakaway, coming out of nowhere. Everyone was getting bodies on players, sticks in passing lanes, and pucks off stickblades. Kenny made a third fewer saves than Mike Lee (who was outstanding) thanks to the defence. And the forwards were in on it, too, laying hits or stepping back if a defender jumped up into the play. Mike Seidel was a human wrecking ball. And Kenny stood his ground, like Gandalf with the Balroc.

Northland News Center video that includes the game-winner, which I did not even see because it was so far away and I didn't have the presence of mind to look at the video board because I was mobbing Biddco and friends.


Northland News Center video of the postgame comments by Mike Montgomery and Mike Connolly.


I am so happy. After the Hermantown loss, the East loss, and the UMD women's loss, it just felt like nothing could go right. I was so nervous it was hard to participate in chants. We were hungry, thirsty, people were sobering up... I mean, we're talking real tragedies here. Anyway, I am so VERY glad I'm not getting in my car at this moment to drive back to the Cities from Duluth after a game right now, and thanks to THE ENTIRE BULLDOG TEAM, I didn't have to!

And I'm sure Palm is beyond thrilled to be on the right end of overtime this time around.

Band of Bulldogs

This day is call'd the feast of Sandelin.
He that outlives this day, and comes safe home,
Will stand a tip-toe when this day is nam'd,
And rouse him at the name of Sandelin.
He that shall live this day, and see old age,
Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours,
And say 'To-morrow is Saint Sandelin.'
Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars,
And say 'These wounds I had on Sandelin's day.'
Old men forget; yet all shall be forgot,
But he'll remember, with advantages,
What feats he did that day. Then shall our names,
Familiar in his mouth as household words-
Justin Fontaine, Mike Montgomery,
Trent Palm and Kyle Schmidt, and Chad Huttel-
Be in their flowing cups freshly rememb'red.
This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Saint Sandelin shall ne'er go by,
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remembered-
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition;
And gentlemen in Duluth now-a-bed
Shall think themselves accurs'd they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Sandelin's day.

-William Shakespeare, Henry V, Act 4 Scene III

Thanks, seniors. All five of you, in your ways, have gone above and beyond for the team, and that is more than appreciated.

Agitating

tUMD 6, Mankato East High School JV Squad 2

You know what I love?

Winning.

You know what makes winning even sweeter?

Irritating opposing fans.

Last night's game started in typical (of late) Bulldog fashion. Eriah (horrible name) Hayes scored on a delayed penalty just over two minutes into the game. Weak. Mike Seidel made up for his penalty with a goal later in the period and we managed to get out of the first period even steven. Chad Huttel took a tripping penalty for a hip check that apparently the cave-dwellers in Mankato thought was kneeing.

Now for the irritation.

Mankato Coach Troy Jutting is known for three things: coaching goons, chain smoking, and whining constantly to the referees. And of course he started in his ref whining. And since I was within earshot of Jutting, I decided he needed a taste of his own medicine. And also to remind him that he needs to have a smoke. And people didn't like it! This horrible old hag behind me was just so offended. "You just don't go after a coach," she whined. "I always had a good impression of Duluth fans until now." Well, lady, I've never had a good impression of your fans, so you only cemented my opinion. I laughed at her passive-aggressive comments to her seatmates. I'd be embarrassed if Sandelin behaved the way Jutting did, not defensive of it.

At the end of the period Jutting decided to bend the ears of the referees again and we decided to remind the refs that they don't have to listen. And the Mankato fans didn't like that either. Hey, have a little respect for your Zamboni drivers. They need to get the ice re-surfaced.

In the second period tUMD took the lead on a JT Brown goal and then had a completely disastrous turnover to allow Mankato to tie it up. Guys, come on. Enough of that crap. PROTECT THE PUCK!!! HOLY CRAP!!!

Mike Seidel got his 2nd goal of the game (yeah for Team Coug!!!) on a power play just before it expired, which is always great. It's demoralizing for the killing team. And Trent Palm had an assist! Always great to see. Justin Faulk put the puck in the net on the next power play but it was waved off due to goaltender interference. Some Mankato fans decided to call tUMD cheaters, but failed to remark that, as they were on the penalty kill, they were also cheaters. MCON scored a legit goal on the next PP and then the period ended.

And the refs didn't even talk to Jutting! They just skated off while Jutting waited, shaking his head. Hilarious. Best decision they made all night!

In the 3rd, JT Brown scored another goal, making two players with two goals in the game, and then Justin Fontaine laid the hammer down. By that point, pretty much all the Mankato fans around me had left, which was so unfortunate! I wanted them to witness my glee! Although they witnessed plenty of glee from the SIX!!! SIX!!!!! SIX! goals we scored, so there's that. Also, to further solidify my high opinion of the people behind me, apparently while it is not ok to rib a coach, it is ok to mock a player for getting checked from behind into the boards (which should have been a five minute major, but the refs were just bizarre all weekend.)

The game could have been much closer, as Mankato fanned on two WIDE FREAKING OPEN NETS and Crandall was NOT on his game. Dear Sandelin, NO MORE GOALIE ROTATION.

Today is Hockey Day in America so I'm chilling watching the Wild followed by the Canadiens. Yay!

I Hope You Had The Time Of Your Life

tUMD 2, Unlucky Stiffs 1

I'm so tired I can barely think.

I woke up this morning terrified tUMD would lose tonight's game. I've never been so nervous in my life for a non-playoff game. The 'Dogs opened the DECC with an 8-1 win over UMTC, and there was nothing I wanted more than to see them close it down with a win.

Oh, and a jersey. Right.

I went out to brunch with Biddco and the Aaaahj at Pizza Luce, and then my dad, Biddco and I went to the football game, where we met up with DHG and tPB Dude. Wrapped in layers of blankets and clothing, we watched the Bulldog football team beat Augustana 24-13. It was an exciting football game and it took my mind off the hockey game for a little while.

After the game, the waiting started to get to me. I was so nervous, in fact, that I couldn't even stay at Green Mill past 5:50. Biddco and I headed over since he wanted to get a good seat in the student section. I noted there were no other bids on the jersey I wanted and then hung out with Ma Ciskie and Li'l Ciskie and watched the DECC fill up.

The team was about to come out when the Zamboni came out onto the ice. Slowly, it opened, and out came the Loon! People were on their feet and cheering. It simply would not have been right if the Loon had not been there to close down the DECC.

The game started strangely, as I think there was supposed to be a ceremonial puck drop with Huffer, and there was not. I can't imagine what could have occurred to prevent it from happening but finally the refs just dropped the puck and the game began.

The Bulldogs were absolutely dominant for at least 40 minutes of the game. If not for Sam Brittain and the pipes, the game would have been a blowout. tUMD didn't get anything into the back of the net until Justin Faulk got a power play goal and I did my first and only goal lap around the DECC. Some of it alone, because I was too slow for Kleiner, DHG and Boody, and the students caught up with me, but I kept going once we got to the student section. Oh well. I didn't want to trip and go flying, or pass out from lack of oxygen.

In the second period, Montgomery was called for interference with 2:38 to go and I had to go down to protect my bid. I missed seeing MCON's goal but I certainly celebrated. I saw a replay of it later. Incredible goal. Just sick. I don't know if Mike Connolly has ever had a garbage goal in his life; his goals are all so lovely.

The jersey auctions are always insane. This year's was no exception. There was lots of posturing and covert observing and flat out panic (ok, that was just me.) I aggressively bid myself into owning Dylan Olsen's jersey. My dad won Trent Palm's, and the Aaaahj was boxed out at the last minute for Max Tardy's by some guy who sandbagged writing down his bid. Argh. I finally felt some of the stress melt away as I realized the jersey was mine.

In the third period, Nick Shore did his best to try to murder Kyle Schmidt, and was asked to leave the game. Let it be known that tUMD had more power play opportunities and fewer overall penalties than DU. We can put to bed any rumors from other teams' fans that the WCHA league officials are biased in favor of DU. (NCAA DII football officials may be biased in favor of Augustana, though.) tUMD did not score on the 5-minute power play although they had some excellent chances, including one that went for review. JT Brown took a slashing penalty and DU scored at the 8:25 mark, making the game too close for comfort once more.

DU put really their only sustained pressure on somewhere around maybe 8 minutes to go? I'm not sure. They had multiple chances and Kenny Reiter played the way we've known he can play all along. He was up to the task, and so were the rest of the Dogs. DU managed to pull their goalie with 1:48 to go, and the Dogs played probably the best final two minutes of a hockey game they have all year. MCON missed a chance for an empty net goal, but instead of trying for a bad shot with a DU player in his way, and a possible turnover, he tied up the puck for precious ticks off the clock. The 'Dogs kept Denver from getting anything decent going with the extra attacker on, and they gained possession with just a few seconds left and that was the game. Incredible. A gutsy way to go ungently into that good night.

After the game, the 'Dogs had a stick salute for the fans before the handshake, and then once DU left the ice, they invited all the alumni present to come down for a final stick salute. After some words from Huffer and the lowering of the "Final Year" banner, Hoagy led over 100 Bulldogs, past and present, in another final stick salute. Audio clips were played of a few milestone tUMD games, and I only wish there had been more. Finally, the players left the ice, and one final audio clip had Marsh Nelson wishing us goodnight.

What a way to go. I cried, I'm not ashamed to admit it. The DECC means a lot to a lot of people. I heard people who had sat next to each other for years saying goodbye to each other. I saw couples who met in college taking pictures with their children in the seats they used to sit in. People lingered, taking pictures, talking, in disbelief that they'll be sitting in a new arena next time the Dogs play in Duluth. The arena was a dump, but it was ours, and it held a lot of memories. And it was built at a time when most arenas were dumps, anyway.

Finally we tore ourselves away from the arena and went to claim our jerseys. I was standing around talking with other successful jersey winners and then the players snuck in. Dylan was one of the first ones in and he came over and was very friendly. I managed to rein in my extreme awkwardness and had a real conversation with him. I asked if he was excited for next weekend and the WJC tryouts and he said yeah. I told him I'd cheer for him, but not for Canada, and asked him if he would light up Justin Faulk if they played against each other. He was noncommittal. I think that means yes. I asked if his dad was there and he said no, but he wished he was. As you all know, Dylan's dad Darryl played for NMU and certainly had some games at the DECC. I also told him I'd converted some Blackhawks fans to UMD fans because of him, and told him I looked forward to watching him play in the NHL and the rest of this year... and maybe next year. He sort of smiled and I said I knew it might not happen and I just wanted him to make the right choice for himself. We got a photo together which is sort of crappy as the Aaaahj was trying to turn on the flash and failed, and then I forgot to ask him to sign my jersey. I'll have to be a creepy stalker after a game sometime and get him to sign it then.

I've spent an hour writing this post and I could probably wax rhapsodic about the DECC for another hour, but for now, I'll just wish you all goodnight.

Rostermania

Not a great title. But an exciting day! Now we know what's what and who's who and where's where and who's on first.

Goalie
#30 Christian Gaffy (fr)
#31 Aaron Crandall (fr-rs)
#35 Kenny Reiter (jr)

Defence
#2 Brady Lamb (jr)
#4 Dylan Olsen (so)
#5 Trent Palm (sr-rs)
#6 Scott Kishel (jr)
#8 Drew Olson (so)
#21 Luke McManus (fr)
#24 Mike Montgomery (sr-C)
#25 Justin Faulk (fr)
#26 Chad Huttel (sr)
#28 Wade Bergman (so)

Forward
#7 Kyle Schmidt (sr)
#10 Dan DeLisle (so)
#11 Travis Oleksuk (jr)
#12 Jack Connolly (jr-A)
#14 Keegan Flaherty (so)
#15 Jake Hendrickson (so)
#17 Mike Seidel (so)
#18 Joe Basaraba (fr)
#19 Max Tardy (fr)
#20 Cody Danberg (sr)
#22 Mike Connolly (jr-A)
#23 J.T. Brown (fr)
#27 David Grun (jr)
#37 Justin Fontaine (sr)

Comments:
1. Stafne is not on the roster. I'll discuss this later.
2. Trent Palm IS on the roster. Welcome back, Trent!
3. Travis Oleksuk has worn 3 numbers in 3 years. #13, #21 and now #11.
4. Kyle Schmidt is #7. Why switch now?
5. Before Faulk, Ryan Geris was the last Bulldog to wear #25.
6. Max Tardy takes over #19 from fellow Duluth native Rob Bordson. Let's hope he can develop as well as (or more quickly than, even!) Bordo, too!
7. JT Brown might have to exorcise some demons from #23.
8. This is the first post labeled seventh season! Wow!

Seeing Spots

The new banner is pretty, no? I know it doesn't fit in with the colour scheme, but it's fun.

So, there are rampant rumours that a certain player who decommitted from a certain sister school is interested in coming to a certain Harvard of the Midwest. But really, where would this certain individual fit in? tUMD is stacked. With or without this certain player, we’re going to have good players sitting every weekend, which is both good and bad. I’ve been wondering how everyone is going to fit in. And hey, I haven’t posted in awhile, so let’s do this.

Ok, so let’s take the team at face value. Here’s what I’ve got (freshmen positions are based on Heisenberg’s site):

Centre
Jack Connolly (Jr)
Travis Oleksuk (Jr)
Danny DeLisle (So)
Chris Stafne (Fr)
Max Tardy (Fr)

Left Wing
Mike Connolly (Jr)
Kyle Schmidt (Sr)
Cody Danberg (Sr)
Jake Hendrickson (So)

Right Wing
Justin Fontaine (Sr)
David Grun (Jr)
Mike Seidel (So)
Keegan Flaherty (So)
Joe Basaraba (Fr)
J.T. Brown (Fr)

Left Defence
Dylan Olsen (So)
Scott Kishel (Jr)
Wade Bergman (So)
Drew Olson (So)
Trent Palm (rs-Sr)
Luke McManus (Fr)

Right Defence
Brady Lamb (Jr)
Mike Montgomery (Sr)
Chad Huttel (Sr)
Chase Ryan (rs-Sr)
Justin Faulk (Fr)

Goalie
Brady Hjelle (Jr)
Kenny Reiter (Jr)
Aaron Crandall (So)

Well, obviously this isn’t going to work. Too many right wings and too many left defencemen. Too many MCs, not enough mics. I’ve made some changes, and here’s what I’ve got.

Ok, first I’m gonna sneak Keegan Flaherty to centre. Jake Hendrickson could do the same but I’m going to give the nod to the Keeg based on his playing time last year, and based on some other things you’ll see later. Stafne is a lefty so I am going to sneak him over to LW.

Now our centres are Jack Connolly, Travis Oleksuk, Danny DeLisle, Keegan Flaherty and Max Tardy.

Note that I have MCON down as a LW even though he has played RW, but at LW he shall stay. Left wingers are Mike Connolly, Kyle Schmidt, Cody Danberg, Jake Hendrickson and Chris Stafne. Right wingers are Justin Fontaine, David Grun, Mike Seidel, Joe Basaraba and J.T. Brown.

At defence we can make the easy adjustment of removing Chase Ryan from the lineup. He has extra eligibility left, but he is getting a real degree in a real subject so let’s say that he is going to start a new career. Someone else has to scoot over to RD, unless Palm chooses not to/is not able to play. But, let’s just assume the best here. Anyway, I think maybe to make things easier I will just put Palm there. He’s also right-handed.

Left defencemen are Dylan Olsen, Scott Kishel, Wade Bergman, Drew Olson and Luke McManus. Right defencemen are Brady Lamb, Mike Montgomery, Chad Huttel, Trent Palm and Justin Faulk.

Goalies are still Brady Hjelle, Kenny Reiter and Aaron Crandall. Now we’re in business and can start crankin’ out the lines.

Top line: Mike Connolly – Jack Connolly – Justin Fontaine
No way is Sandy going to open the season any other way. I am sure there will be many different combinations throughout the year, but this is such an easy call. With no Overly Mature Canadian team to tune up with, gotta stick with what ya know.

Second line: Kyle Schmidt – Travis Oleksuk – Mike Seidel
Left wing and centre were easy picks, but I am really unsure about this one. I can see either J.T. Brown or Joe Basaraba on here, too at some point in the season. I really hate the idea of Seidel relegated to the 4^th line, but he could also pick up a spot on the 3^rd line without losing any grit there, and I could see him on the top line if Sandy gets the urge to juggle things. He’s my breakout pick.

Third line: Cody Danberg – Danny DeLisle – David Grun
People might be killed by this line. Literally, not figuratively.

Fourth line: Jake Hendrickson – Flaherty – J.T. Brown
J.T. has been explosive so far in the USHL, which as we know is not a guarantee of success, but that’s why I put him in over Basaraba. Flaherty and Hendo are in to start with because they’ve paid their dues, as (almost) all freshmen must. Of course, once the season gets into high gear, anything goes, and there are going to be a lot of guys duking it out for a spot in the lineup.

Bleacher line: Stafne – Tardy - Basaraba
Get those suits pressed.

Top defensive pairing: Dylan Olsen – Mike Montgomery
Obvious pairing is obvious.

Second pairing: Wade Bergman – Brady Lamb
Ah, who can forget Rat Boy? Dear, dear Rat Boy. (I am sorry, this is not nice. But somehow I thought this one time and can't get it out of my head. It's better than Smeagol, which is what Akins calls him.) Bergman was voted rookie of the year and I am totally in agreement. Lamb has his issues but defencemen mature more slowly. He should be solid this year.

Third pairing: Scott Kishel – Justin Faulk
Complete opposite of what I said about the forwards. Faulk is going to get a chance right away.

Fourth pairing: Drew Olson – Chad Huttel
It just pains me to put Drew here. I think he’s awesome and has really come into his own, but I think Scotty’s been placed ahead of him by the coaching staff. If Sandy refuses to sit seniors, then Faulk will be here instead of Huttel, but Faulk’s offensive upside blows away Huttel’s, um, temper.

Fifth pairing: Luke McManus – Trent Palm
It all depends on Palm’s health and his plans. However, I think he’ll be eased back into the lineup if he does return, so I’m putting him here. And Luke, I am sorry, but you are the low man on the indigenous wooden sculpture.

Starting goalie: Kenny Reiter
Kenny Reiter? Yes he can! His overall performance last year (North Dakota game notwithstanding) gives him the first game of the year.

Backup: Brady Hjelle
When Hjelle’s hot, he’s hot, and if he can find consistency, he’ll be back in there again.

Backup’s Backup: Aaron Crandall
He didn’t see a second of ice time this past year, so I don’t see him climbing the ranks. I hope we at least see him in the exhibition game against the teenagers in January.

So, really, this is a full lineup and then some. I don’t see any way to fit another guy into the lineup, let alone give him any scholarship money.

Soliloquy

Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from game to game
To the last syllable of recorded play,
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief goal light!
Hockey's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the ice
And then is heard no more: it is a blog
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

-Macbeth, Act V Scene V



Well, I don't know what to say. We don't know if this is the end of the season or not, for sure, but I feel like it is. We'll never see Akins, Fulton, Chase Ryan, Palm (though he is eligible for a red-shirt) and most likely others in a Bulldog jersey again. I can't be critical of anyone tonight because... because I just can't. I don't want to. I mean, really, what's the point? They won home ice. They made it to the Final Five. I'd say I'm satisfied with the season.

But one thing about tonight's game: Kenny was AMAZING.

Oh, and I rode the Zamboni, which was so incredibly cool and exhilarating and I wish it had been a good omen for the team.

Skate-by-Numbers

The new roster is finally, finally, finally up. Sort of. No new pics, to my extreme dissastisfaction. So very very curious to see what the guys look like now that their hair has grown back. Or to see if certain individuals have quit using peroxide on their hair. And also to see who had to share their suit and tie.

1 Kenny Reiter
2 Brady Lamb
3 Chase Ryan
4 Evan Oberg
5 Trent Palm (quit being #54, which is good. This isn't football!!)
6 Scott Kishel
7 Drew Akins
8 Drew Olson (okay, grouping the Drews together is good)
10 Dan DeLisle
11 Kyle Schmidt
12 Jack Connolly (Is Chris keeping the same number, too?)
13 Travis Oleksuk
14 Keegan Flaherty
19 Rob Bordson (Switching it up from #15)
21 Cody Danberg
22 Mike Connolly
23 Jordan Fulton
24 Mike Montgomery
26 Chad Huttel
27 David Grun (Excellent choice staying with #27, David! Be ready to score me a birthday goal!)
28 Wade Bergman
30 Brady Hjelle
37 Justin Fontaine

Stealth (no numbers yet)
Jake Hendrickson
Dylan Olsen
Mike Seidel (Pick #15!! Pick #15!!! It's the hottie number!)

Ultra Stealth (not on roster yet)
Aaron Crandall

Sneaky (still on the roster)
Evan Oberg

O Captain! My Captain!

Over the years we have been together, my dear readers, I've been many things. Joker, smoker, midnight toker, and now bookie. That's right, I'm going to handicap the 2009-2010 UMD hockey captaincy for you. No, no need to thank me. I'm here to serve you.

(Other important news: my Jacky and Fuzzy may be drafted! Ee!)

Note: I'm not going to distinguish between captains and assistant captains. Too lazy. Plus, UMD has had tri-captains, one captain and two assistants, and co-captains with no assistants in the past three years.

Seniors
Drew Akins - 1:1
Drew's pretty a shoo-in for some sort of leadership role, and I'm pretty sure it would be the C. Drew stands up for his teammates, which sometimes gets him in a little bit of trouble, but at least he doesn't have rage blackouts like Zach Jones or attack mascots like Joe Finley; he regains control easily. He's won the heart of MeanEgirl, and a whole slew of creeps at USCHO can attest that is no easy task.

Jordan Fulton - 18:1
Jordy's a senior, which certainly give him an advantage, but I'm not sure. Rumors swirling that he might bolt for Calgary early have so far been incorrect, but they might affect the locker room's vote.

Trent Palm - 12:1
Palm's got more of a chance than Fulton as he is a defenceman, where the team isn't as deep. Palm could have red-shirted but gutted out the season as best he could, which I'm sure his teammates noticed. He's got a mean hip check, and I'm about 99% certain his brother dressed up as a gorilla at regionals.

Chase Ryan - 300:1
Well-liked by all of his teammates, not being on the ice and thus unable to fulfill many captain's duties makes the odds pretty long for Chase.

Juniors
Rob Bordson - 100:1
Bordo had some ups and downs this past season, so he'll probably need another year before his chances improve.

Cody Danberg - 30:1
Cody's a hard worker on the ice, and I think he's a bit of a dark horse candidate, though we may need to wait til next year for a chance to see a letter on his chest.

Justin Fontaine - 5:1
After rocketing to WCHA stardom as a sophomore, The Fonz may be ready to step up as a leader. After all, he can score like mad on the power play and can start a jukebox without a quarter.

Chad Huttel - 75:1
The Hutt will need to crack the lineup consistently before he can seriously contend for a letter. He's been known to stand up for his teammates before, so I'm sure he has it in him to lead. Show us what you're made of this year, Chad!

Mike Montgomery - 50:1
Monty crossed over from foward to defenceman seamlessly, showing he was willing to do what the team needed. If he continues to show the defensive prowess he had last season, he'll take on a leadership role as a senior. This year? I doubt it.

Kyle Schmidt - 30:1
Smitty so willingly sacrificed his face for the good of the team, and he is also a supergenius. I believe captains should be strong academically as well as athletically, to set a good example for their teammates.

Sophomores
Jack Connolly - 50:1
My Sweet Jacky is already captain of my heart, but I think the team will go to the upperclassmen ranks this year. Junior and senior year, his odds will improve greatly.

Mike Connolly - 45:1
Shocking, I know, that I'd give him better odds than MSJ, but I was asking someone else (someone who knows the guys better than I do, meaning AT ALL) who they thought would be captains and MCON's name was mentioned.

David Grun - 250:1
Without very many games under his belt, Grun's got to get more experience at the collegiate level before he can expect a C or an A.

Brady Hjelle - 200:1
Brady will be setting the tone in goal for us, letter or no letter. I doubt he'll even be a C or A even as a senior, but he'll certainly be a leader on the team.

Scott Kishel - 180:1
I'm pretty sure Scott will be anchoring a PP unit this year, but I don't see a formal leadership role for him just yet.

Brady Lamb - 100:1
The odds that Brady will be a captain or assistant for UMD someday? Probably about 2:1. But for now, he gets an edge over Kishel simply due to playing time last year, but he'll have to wait his turn.

Travis Oleksuk - 100:1
I think it would be great for Oleksuk to be a captain someday! He's a legacy, after all. Did you know his dad ranks 9th in the NCAA in career power play goals? I just learned that now. T.O. doesn't need to focus on a captaincy right now. He needs to focus on having a breakout sophomore season.

Kenny Reiter - 275:1
If Hjelle's odds aren't that good, and he's looking to be our starter, then Kenny's odds can't be much better. The goalies just need to do their thing and keep each other sharp.

Freshmen
Aggregate odds: 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000:1
I guess anything's possible; it's the whole premise of the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle. (Check it, there's even a sexy Fourier series!!)

Rehab

Losers 2, Winners 2
(A tie is now referred to as a "Tech win.")

The best thing about late posts is they are usually better. We shall see. I'm still trying to piece together the weekend. Thank goodness for the many people who contributed to the invention of the digital camera. And thank goodness for the delete button on said camera!

I am sorry in advance that this post is full of dumb inside jokes. Unless you are in on those jokes, in which case I am not sorry. You might be, but I can't help that.

Friday night was pretty tame, as I mentioned in that post, which seems so long ago now. This meant my fellow shortie and I were well-rested for the day, and we started it off standing out in the cold heckling an IM broomball game. People at Tech are very serious about broomball. They are not serious about playing defence in their broomball games, though. We also ate at a Chinese food place that did not take my food before I was done eating it nor did it have someone trying to put lemons in the water of non-lemon likers, and I also got to be a creeper for a few minutes because a player walked in. I thought maybe Chinese food was a good thing to eat before games but in fact that person could have eaten a bucket of lard and it would not have mattered because he did not play.

The hockey part of the day started early as I had to go to the VP and Yager's IM hockey game. Many of those people were equally as talented as MTU's varsity squad, and I do not mean that in a complimentary fashion, less the VP think I was being nice. Word to the wise: I AM NEVER NICE. Some of tUMD's fans were at the game, too, as they had nothing better to do. It was very enjoyable as we all sang the "$5 footlongs" song and made up cheers about our friends. I think the IM puck bunnies (sooo incredibly unnecessary) did not like us. It's okay, though. The VP went offsides and ruined everything at one point. Stick to VPing, VP.

I got in free to both games, Friday compliments of Le Russell, my secret boyfriend, and Saturday compliments of getting there so freaking early so I could stalk and the ROTC kids weren't there yet to guard the doors. You know, when I was in ROTC we did crap like that to make money for the battalion but I was stuck 1. covered in cold hot chocolate 2. hauling a giant thing of overpriced sodas through the upper deck of Memorial Stadium trying to hawk them to people who did not want them or 3. cleaning up soggy popcorn, mini-booze bottles, and nearly-liquid funnel cake the day after the Illini got their butts whipped by the rest of the Big 10. I think taking tickets would have been more fun and less freaking nasssty.

I am glad that we arrived as early as we did because later on tUMD started doing their little warmups and they were doing their plios/stretching EXACTLY WHERE I HAD WALKED IN A MERE 20 MINUTES PRIOR. And if I had walked into that I THINK I WOULD HAVE DIED. I commented on this, saying I would have wanted to RUN AWAY FAST like I did once when I told Justin Fontaine "Good game" at Blackwoods and then RAN AWAY before he could even answer (he said "Thanks" I think). MEg pointed out I'd look even more crazy if I did, and I said I wasn't planning on actually running away, just wishing I was going to run away. Fortunately that nightmare only happened in my head.

The game was even more fun somehow even though we "Tech lost." Sadly, the Tech students did not decide to show up to the game, but we were there to help by once again occupying their student section. tPBers came up with some GREAT chants and we had a lot of fun going back and forth with the Tech fans. I horribly embarrassed MEg because it was really quiet in the arena because they were having some sort of sportsmanship announcement from their captain and it was very poorly read, like a robot or something, and I was yelling about it. I know that I often say that I wish I was louder but in this case it was unnecessary because MEg told me that she happened to be focusing on one particular Tech player and the instant I opened my big fat mouth to bellow out "COULD YOU PLEASE ENUNCIATE?" he looked at me like my words were stabbing him in the eyes.

It was very hard to watch the game because of all of the goings-on. Tech jumped out to an early lead and then Gergy got a goal and I was so excited and happy. He seemed that way, too. We all chanted "Just like last night!" which was a great idea. It was incredibly strange because it was a PP goal and the assists went to Andrew Carroll and Nick Kemp, and they are not normally on the PP. But good job! Yeah! Between periods I followed MEg to the other side of the arena to climb up and meet Huskyfan. I needed some oxygen. I don't know why old people would want to sit so high up. I am young and I almost needed Boosh to carry me up. I don't know why I didn't think of that then. Then we went to the Blue Line club to meet MacDie and some lady started screaming that a Bulldog fan had entered as if I was carrying the bubonic plague or something. I mean, maybe I was, but still, calm down. It was 100 degrees in there. MacDie offered me some food but I declined (I DECLINED FOOD. IT'S SO UN-AMERICAN.) because of the death stares I was getting. I got a cup of water and even then people were all "Bitch get away from our jugs of wine." This provided an excellent distraction for Boosh to make off with half of their buffet.

The second period was good because Meyers got a goal and then Seth Soley breathed too close to Alex Stalock and he went down like he was Geoff Kinrade. Hee. (I am sorry Al but you know you totally flopped.) Akins went all Akins on Soley and Palm and Bunger bear-hugged for awhile so they all went to time out. It took a very long time to sort out the penalties and then there were net problems. I was nervous because we could not afford to get any DQs. I am always nervous at games, though. I think I was clutching Marty at one point. At the 2nd intermission tUMD fans put on a parade and marched through the arena to find the fan bus fans. They cheered when we came over and we cheered for them. Then we walked back through the concourse chanting "LET'S GO BULLDOGS!" and people stared.

The 3rd period sucked because Weird Derek Kitti scored the game-tying goal and I knew, I just KNEW, we were not going to score another goal. I should have worn a different jersey. Or something. Or maybe I should have sabotaged some of the guys. They (and their LLC) were in close proximity to me for much of the trip. And they didn't even know it. Muahahahaha. Overtime sucked too. We seriously almost lost the game like 600 times. Or once. I was sitting in a weird seat that was at the top of the stairs and so I had to hold onto the railing to keep from rocketing down the stairs. After the game ended we chanted "BEAT THE GOPHERS" and everyone stared at us like "What are Gophers?" Hello, we were trying to be nice.

After the game, things happened. The end.

The Numbers
Wins until we equal last season's total: Not even necessary!
Points until we equal last season's total: Eee!

My Guys
MacGregor Sharp: 31!
Jack Connolly: 22
Michael Gergen: 14!
Rob Bordson: 0

Freshmen
Mike Connolly: 27!
Jack Connolly: 22
Scott Kishel: 2
Brady Lamb: 1
Travis Oleksuk: 1
David Grun: 0

On Notice
Rob Bordson
Andrew Carroll
Jay Cascalenda
Jack Connolly (whyyyyyyyy?)
Jordan Fulton
Kyle Schmidt
Alex Stalock

Goals Only
Matt Greer
Nick Kemp
Mike Montgomery
Trent Palm

Manifest Destiny

tUMD 4, Racist Mascots 2

In the early days of the WCHA season, there were those among the Denver fanbase who believed the Pioneers were destined and divinely ordained by the hockey gods to expand their empire across the whole of Division I hockey. They used this belief to justify their domination of other species such as huskies and bulldogs (and sweet, sweet buffalo!) as well as their violent attacks on innocent little fuzzy guys.

So the Pioneers rolled into town in their covered wagons with their sights on eradicating the Bulldogs from this earth once and for all. Along the way, they had to ford the Yukon River and lost an oxen, 2 sets of clothing, and a wagon wheel, and then Tyler Bozak got cholera and they went past a gravesite that says "Here lies Andy. Pepperoni and chease [sic]." For more information on the Pioneers's journey, please consult this informative simulation.

So, after the first game, in which DU circled their wagons to keep the PP from scoring, and then made base camp in tUMD's goal crease to either screen or cherry-pick (depending on the individual), something needed to be done. A last stand, perhaps, though one preferrably more successful than General Custer's. Interestingly enough, this last stand involved some very similar strategery (or, rather, lack of strategery) to the previous night's shenanigans. Meaning, Pioneers camped out in front of the net, etc. Some time in the third period, tUMD was on the penalty kill, and there was OF COURSE a player in the crease and a Bulldog player (who shall remain nameless) standing near him. IF THERE IS A PLAYER IN YOUR CREASE, DON'T FREAKING WATCH HIM. GET HIM THE FREAK OUT OF THERE. I can't even stand it. How many goals would that have saved? So I yelled something marginally coherent, and then the secret player gave the guy in the crease a little shove and he moved. It was like we were on the same wavelength! We're connected, Trent! I mean, uh, secret player. But thank you for doing that. Now everyone try to make a point of it. (Although it seems like every time a tUMD player decides to play physically they get called for a penalty, so it's a pretty fine line, but please, figure something out.)

Oh, and Coach? I know you weren't so happy with the PK and some of the defence from Friday night, but the substitution you made didn't make any sense.

I was, of course, late to the game, as I essentially parked on the lake I was so far away from the game. I missed Sharp's goal, one second after the expiration of the power play, but I did hear the goal horn as I was running to the ticket booth. Exciting. The battle had truly begun. And the game was a sell-out! That's, what, two sell-outs this year? Against non-Gopher teams? That's huge. Even though I complained about the availability of tickets, it's still pretty exciting to have the team selling out games again. Plus I had a seat anyway, because I have friends in high places. Like, the top row of the student section. Which was a bit of a challenge to get to, but I'm tough.

What a fun game! I enjoyed the three early goals, although I got a little whiny because they came so close together that there was a long stretch with nothing to celebrate. I think I was even whining about it when Gergy decided to make Cheverie look like a water buffalo wallowing in a mudhole. (I don't really like to think about water buffalo because there is a part in the book The Things They Carried about a water buffalo that is horribly disturbing.) Woohoo!

There should have been a few other goals in the game, including one DU shot that clanked off the pipe. Burbstyle said it was the luckiest we had been all season until I shut him down by reminding him of last weekend's installment of the Alex Stalock Goaltending Circus. Burbs was pwned. I can't believe I said that. I guess I'm getting ready for Tech weekend ALREADY! Yay! Fonzie hit a couple of pipes, too, and MSJ had what I thought was a wide-open net but somehow stupid Chevy go-go-Gadgeted his leg or pad or something over and saved it and I almost tumbled over onto Biddco because I was standing on the back of my seat.

The game ended very poorly because Foz E. Bear was trying to get an empty net goal with 3 seconds left and stupid jerk Mullen decided to brutally slash him. Listen, Mr. Mullen. I know you are not a very good player and a disproportionate number of the crappy plays in the game could be attributed to you, but it isn't very kind to take it out on anyone else. You could have just slashed yourself. Then Gwozzy tried to make you apologize and no one cared, so you just looked stupid, which was good. I wasn't really sure what was going on at the time; I thought that the refs were going to make them leave the ice without shaking hands in order to avoid a UMTC/UND-style incident, but things got explained later on.

The Curling Club followed, and pure insanity. DU fans are incredibly fun. My voice is completely shot.

The Numbers
Wins until we equal last season's total: FINITO!!!!
Points until we equal last season's total: BRAVISSIMO!!!

My Guys
MacGregor Sharp: 28!
Jack Connolly: 22
Michael Gergen: 13! (Now flat to last year in points!!)
Rob Bordson: 0

Freshmen
Mike Connolly: 25!
Jack Connolly: 22 (So close to having a goal that I pre-celebrated it!)
Scott Kishel: 2
Brady Lamb: 1
Travis Oleksuk: 1
David Grun: 0

On Notice
Rob Bordson
Andrew Carroll
Jay Cascalenda
Nick Kemp
Kyle Schmidt
Alex Stalock

Goals Only
Justin Fontaine
Matt Greer
Josh Meyers
Mike Montgomery
Trent Palm

We're Not Mercyhurst!

Hello, everyone! Are you all sleepy from your 4 a.m. jaunts to Walmart for cheap crap that no one wants to receive from you because they already know it's cheap Walmart crap? I'll take a gift receipt, please. Oh, we may have some St. Cloud fans in the hizzy this weekend, so I'll try to make them feel included. Did you enjoy your campout at FleetFarm to get the lastest fashions from Carhart? Something in a coverall, perhaps?

Now, let's talk about the real turkeys: Duh Huskies!!! (Heather, you can stop reading now. It's better this way.)

"St. Cloud State University: you'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy." Ah, Obi-Wan, you sure do know what you're talking about.

We really laid the hurt down on St. Cloud in the first game of the series. In case you've forgotten, here is the box score and here is my recap. One is informative. The other is not. Guess which one!!!

To recap the recaps, the Connollys Connollied all over the Huskies. There was only one goal that was not either a direct or indirect result of a Connolly, and it was scored by Matt Greer from Andrew Carroll and Trent Palm. I always love goals where random combinations of people score. I mean, yes, Carroll and Greer were on the same line and all, but... well... they're not exactly Bill Watson and Brett Hull. But, it was a very exciting goal and I was very unstressed once they scored. tUMD also went 3/7 on the power play and 6/6 on the penalty kill. Bob Vader tried to pull another Kronick by inserting *itch Ryan onto the 2nd line, but he barely touched the ice (yet managed to be -1 as he was on the ice for the first goal) and only showed up on the stat sheet by taking a boarding penalty.

Some things have changed. St. Cloud swept Denver after Denver swept us. They also split with Wisconsin whereas we only had 1 sad little point. St. Cloud also eked out a few wins against college hockey powerhouse Robert Morris. We took three against perennial bottom-feeder North Dakota. Chris Hepp cut his mullet. *itch Ryan hasn't played since tX.

Some things have stayed the same. St. Cloud still has a terrible power play. They have 1 power play goal in conference play. ONE POWER PLAY GOAL. That is a power play percentage of 2.2%. I'm feeling pretty good about our pk. I always feel good about our PK, especially when Matty Greer is taking care of business out there.

I'm trying to figure out Garrett Roe's status by wading through the SCCC season thread on USCHO (barf) but all I can find is domestic bickering between the cousin/sibling/spouses on there. Okay, something actually posted in the game thread and it appears Roe will be playing despite a BRUISE on his LEFT ARM. REPEAT: A BRUISE ON HIS LEFT ARM. DO YOU READ, ME? OVER. Well, I guess that means there will be two crybabies on the ice instead of just the usual Ryan Lasch. (HEATHER!! I TOLD YOU TO STOP READING!!!)

We need two points this weekend. Sic 'em, Dogs. Stick salute tomorrow night!

Gorgeousness And Gorgeousity Made Flesh

tUMD 3, Terrible Power Play 1

You know, say what you will about Godzilla, but he gets results. He ravaged Tokyo. I ravaged my apartment. And now? A win. Superb! This game was like a bird of rarest-spun heaven metal or like silvery wine flowing in a spaceship, gravity all nonsense now.* It's going to be a trail of tears back to Grand Forks for those fans that made the trip. Thankfully the state is flat or there'd be throngs of people lining up to jump off cliffs.

So many good things about this game. Let's discuss!

1. Ok, this is a bad thing in a way, but stupid B2 thought the game started at 7:37. The Charter channel wasn't working right away and I was in a state of panic. I always have the radio going (and THAT didn't start until just before game time, thanks to the sub-chimpanzees that work back at the station) but I like to SEE things. I emailed B2 and they said "The game starts at 7:37, please stand by." I responded kindly (ha!) and they wrote back with a link saying I would not be charged for the game. I responded, again all sweetness and light, explaining that the problem was not the feed once it got started, but rather the game had already been underway for half an hour. They did not have any further comment at presstime. If it hadn't been in Charter I would have cut someone. I really needed to SEE the glories of this game.

2. We certainly took a lot of penalties, but our PK was so amazing tonight!!! I mean yeah, they did give up a goal, but that was on the 9th pp. There certainly were some scares where we just got lucky, but overall it was just HIGH QUALITY PLAY. We cleared the zone a LOT and normally on the PK we spend most of our time blocking shots and breaking up shooting lanes which makes me very nervous (let's face it, when am I NOT nervous during a hockey game?), but tonight it seemed like we forced a turnover just as soon as NDK tried to gain the zone.

3. Speaking of gaining the zone, as Rik put it, "the Bulldogs put up a nice picket fence on the blue line." Classic NDK hockey usually involves a strong transition game and for long stretches of the game they could not gain the zone. I feel like we are usually on the receiving end of that kind of defence, so it was great to see us play that way. GREAT adjustments from Friday to Saturday. We need to learn to defend and break out against multiple styles of play.

4. "Gergen's" goal was nice, although as much as I love Michael (and he looked very sexy in his television interview after the first period), I really don't think he touched it out front, but it is so hard to tell. Palm had a pretty great game overall (Palm-wise) and even though he took a few penalties, I'm just happy he made it on the stat sheet in another way. And boy did that water bottle pop!

3. Jordan Fulton's goal was about the most perfect goal I've seen since Mike Connolly undressed the WMU goalie. Fulton and Fontaine had a 2 on 1 with some hoser from UND (I could look up his name but it's not really important, they all suck) and Fontaine made a pass to Fulton that resulted in a wide open net and Jordy did not make any doubt about it. Also, Jordy is a MUCH better hockey name than Jordan, so I will try to refer to him as Jordy from now on.

4. While Fulton's goal was perfect, the entire play that set up MacGregor Sharp's goal was beyond perfect. Josh Meyers at the point to Mike Connolly in the semi-high slot to MacGregor Sharp who slammed it home. Two extremely quick passes to get that set up; any little error or misfire and that goal doesn't happen. I mean, that's the type of play that works perfectly in practice but never seems to go right in reality. But that's three skilled guys putting it together and executing flawlessly.

5. Alex Stalock, of course, rocked everyone's faces off. He wasn't really tested much to start the game, but once he was, he showed he was up to the task. He had a shutout going until 7:28 was left in the game, but I don't really care that he gave up one goal. As demoralizing as it would have been to the weeping masses in UND's camp to get shutout by the "vastly inferior" "clutching and grabbing" "UAA-like" Bulldogs, 1 GA is still pretty sharp. God did he make some amazing saves, sometimes seemingly at the last minute!

6. I can't single out anyone who had a bad game. Everyone seemed to be having great individual games and every line and defensive pairing worked well together. That was one well-oiled machine out there tonight, and I was so happy and proud to be a Bulldogs fan. I'm always glad I'm a Bulldogs fan but it's just so much more fun when we win! I was happy to see them assert themselves after a tie. Because the DECC is OUR HOUSE and we are rude hosts.

I will reiterate, for those UND fans who might have missed it: It has been my experience that the more someone knows about the game of hockey, the less they complain about the officiating of individual games.

The Numbers
Wins until we equal last season's total: 7! (Marvelous!)
Points until we equal last season's total: 16! (Glorious!)

My Guys
MacGregor Sharp: 15! (FANTASTIC goal!!!)
Jack Connolly: 9! (Totally awesome tonight! Almost had a goal or 2 also!)
Michael Gergen: 6! (A total sweetie and humble about it!)
Rob Bordson: 0 (But back in action! And played really well!)

Freshmen
Mike Connolly: 11!
Jack Connolly: 9!
David Grun: 0
Scott Kishel: 0
Brady Lamb: 0
Travis Oleksuk: 0

On Notice:
Drew Akins
Rob Bordson
Jay Cascalenda
Matt Greer
Mike Montgomery
Kyle Schmidt
Alex Stalock

Goals Only
Andrew Carroll
Jack Connolly
Cody Danberg
Nick Kemp
Trent Palm

*This and the title are A Clockwork Orange quotations. Although they are describing something entirely different. If you've seen the movie, then you know. If you haven't, well, you're culturally illiterate and most likely a St. Cloud fan.

RWDzilla

tUMD 2, Ref Whiners 2

First of all, as a sister, I am offended that tying is considered "sister-kissing." There's nothing wrong with family affection. I mean, we're not talking about a tonsil scraping here, but just a nice peck on the cheek. Not that I have kissed my brother since I was probably 4 years old or possibly younger, but I am by no means the yardstick by which people should measure themselves. I am barely taller than a yardstick, for crying out loud.

Last night was a bit of a challenge for me. I was doing okay until something really annoying and un-hockey related set me off. I was staaaaaaaaaaaaaaarving and I had ordered a pizza that was taking forever. It finally arrived right before Travis Oleksuk's penalty, and The Aaaahj went down to get it. Then the phone rang and EVENTUALLY after a few minutes of stoner-talk, I was able to ascertain it was the pizza delivery man-child, telling me he had grabbed the wrong order and would be back in "five minutes." So I had to run back downstairs and grab the Aaaahj DURING A PENALTY KILL and then he wasn't there because he'd gone to the other entrance to the apartment to see if the man-child was there. I RAN back to the apartment and OF COURSE UND had scored and I kicked the door in frustration.

Things escalated.


Then Jacky got kicked out of the game for a check from behind. I threw my cell phone across the room. Not just because of my Jacky, but also because I lost faith that we would come back. I'm sorry, guys. I never should have done that. First tUMD had a great 2 on 1 scoring chance, but in order to break up the 2 on 1, Chris VandeVelde (who has a capital letter in the middle of their name? LOSERS!) took out Andrew Carroll and they both went crashing into the net.

I never cease to be amazed by the North Dakota fanbase. This game was televised, so we all had a great look at the play and I know there was at least one replay. It was the only thing that Vandevelde could do and the right play to make, but IT WAS A PENALTY. And UND fans thought it should be on tUMD. Yes, on a 2 on 1 scoring chance we are going to take a penalty for... trying to score on your team? But, Ben Blood punching Trent Palm repeatedly in the head is something to be lauded and praised. I expect a parade for him thrown once they return to Grand Forks. (P.S. Welcome back Trent, but could you please tone down the penalties?)

It has been my experience that the more someone knows about the game of hockey, the less they complain about the officiating of individual games. That's all I'll say on that note.

Fortunately, on the ensuing power play, we scored to tie the game! I almost had a heart attack when they reviewed the goal. The longer they deliberated about Josh's goal, the more I panicked. And Bruce and Rik weren't helping matters. I knew it was a goal (bless you, Channel 13!) but that doesn't mean that it wouldn't be waved off. We've already experienced that this season.

Some people have commented that tUMD fans acted like we won the game while UND fans acted like we lost, implying that somehow tUMD is bad and our fans are so pathetic we're happy with a tie. I disagree. Obviously our fans were a lot more excited because we were the last team to score, and we were facing a loss with under 2 minutes left in the game. I'm happy with a tie if it means we got a point when we were facing none; what sane person wouldn't be? Oh... I suppose sane would be the operative word here.

All in all, good job to tUMD for never quitting and really hustling in that 3rd period, despite playing the second game in a row down 2 players (if you recall, Cody Danberg and Mike Connolly were both asked to leave the Saturday night game against UW). And Kyle Schmidt, I hope you got a lot of painkillers. How about sending me a photo of your busted cage?

The Numbers
Wins until we equal last season's total: 8
Points until we equal last season's total: 18! (Okay, creeping along.)

My Guys
MacGregor Sharp: 14! (Yay!!! Off notice!!)
Jack Connolly: 7 (Argh. Don't wanna talk about it.)
Michael Gergen: 5
Rob Bordson: 0

Freshmen
Mike Connolly: 10
Jack Connolly: 7
Scott Kishel: 0
Brady Lamb: 0
Travis Oleksuk: 0 (But! Cracked the lineup! And took the penalty that led to the 2nd goal!)
David Grun: 0

On Notice (Step up, guys!):
Drew Akins
Rob Bordson
Jay Cascalenda
Jack Connolly
Jordan Fulton
Matt Greer
Kyle Schmidt
Alex Stalock

Goals Only
Andrew Carroll
Cody Danberg
Nick Kemp
Mike Montgomery
Trent Palm

teltnuaG ehT

Donald attempted to Gauntlet me. He did not succeed. Here are the results. Now step aside and let Mama take over.

(Extremely long wait for Donald to get to his computer)
DTP: Ok ... so should we get this over with? [Well, I waited around for forever, so could we please get on with it?]

RWD: Are you sure you're ready?

DTP: 1st question: Why do you hate Mike Connolly?

RWD: Aww, I don't hate Fuzzy. I'm pro Fuzzy. Some big bad Bronco player threw him into the boards last weekend and I about cut someone, but the REF called a PENALTY and I almost died. [Maybe the system works!]

DTP: Mike senses your overwhelming love for Jack and he isn't amused.

RWD: Oh really? Did your Spidey sense tell you that?

DTP: I'm uncharacteristically intuitive about such things

RWD: I think he's probably happy I'm not a freak over him. He sleeps better at night I'm sure. [Meanwhile, I’m sure Jack is terrified. And rightfully so. I am crazy.]

DTP: Do you agree with Hannes Alfven that in a Universe filled with Plasma that electric currents are pervasive? [Do you agree that no one other than possibly MEg is going to understand that question?]

RWD: I failed my plasma engineering course. The professor was a jackass though. [To him, “short quiz” was actually “horrendously long test.” Didn’t get THAT memo.]

DTP: Are you more or less intellectually curious than Sarah Palin?

RWD: I am a McCain supporter and will not participate in anything that mocks her, though Amy Poehler's rap was amazing.

DTP: Will Sandy give Kenny Reiter a start this weekend?

RWD: I don't know. I don't even know if Kenny is there. I am attempting to find out. Bruce is being reticent. He threatened my life. [He did finally respond but only with information that was either self-evident or irrelevant. Then later his blog had useful information. No.]

DTP: I'll handle Bruce this weekend. Was he pouty cos [stupid foreigner spelling] I didn't show up and say hi last year? [We did not go to Anchorage last year. Maybe he was upset because he donated money to your stupid Final Five fund.]

RWD: Bruce is pouty because I send him barrages of text messages about stupid stuff. [Mom and Dad cover your eyes] While I am driving.

DTP: Did it snow there yet?

RWD: No. But every customer that I talk to that finds out I am in Minnesota asks me that. Or about the Mall of America. [Or they tell me I should be in prison, that I am a criminal, that I don't want to help them, or they just say "Listen young lady..."]

DTP: Be happy that they know Minnesota is a state

RWD: It is THE state. Of hockey.

DTP: Is Sandelin's job on the line this year?

RWD: Yes. There is major talent on this team and if we don't finish better then there's no way I can defend him anymore. I will most likely usurp him.

DTP: What will tUMD fans consider "better"?

RWD: Home ice for the playoffs.

DTP: Coke or Pepsi?

RWD: Coke, definitely coke. And also Coca-Cola.

DTP: Rant on to your own satisfaction about USCHO... [meaning Ugly Stupid Crack Heads Online]

RWD: I don't really mention "that site" on my blog as I don't want to give them any undue publicity. It does give me a nice ego boost; it reminds me of how intelligent I am. It is a fruit roll-up of vulgarity, depravity, and the worst elements of the human psyche. It's like shower shoes covered in mold. I generally go on there only to offend.

DTP: As did I once upon a time

RWD: I can't say I ever read one of your posts but I know I'm much more reserved than you are. I usually forget what posts I've started things in.

DTP: Will the LHC create a black hole?

RWD: St. Cloud State will. With all the negative pressure (vacuums don't suck, people!) coming out of there.

DTP: Compare the Bulldogs defense this year to last years blueliners

RWD: They are... um... Kind of the same? Palm is still Palm. Cascalenda is still Cascalenda. Oberg is back and scoring us goals.

DTP: Garrison is gonzo. [Eeeeeee!]

RWD: Yes but I can't compare Garrison to noGarrison. Mike Montgomery has joined the blueline and is a big kid who knows how to play the offensive side of the game as well. Our penalty kill is not as strong.

DTP: What about Josh Meyers?

RWD: Josh is Josh. He is supposed to be another offensive defenceman but I just can't figure him out. He does score points. I don't know how I feel about him on the PP. I know that Scotty Kishel is going to be a great PP guy in the coming years. He is kind of in and out of the lineup.

DTP: Did you guys get whistled for boatloads of penalties so far?

RWD: Yes. But we always do. I think that we were spoiled last year with an outstanding PK.

DTP: Special Teams looks to be THE "theme" this year.

RWD: I think coaches say that every year. They are always a key element of the game and no team is very successful without good special teams. I think the big problem is if there are more penalties on both sides that more guys need to be ready to fill those roles. Many guys play on both the PP and the PK and we really don't want to kill them.

DTP: The extra-emphasis this year on stick-related offenses is an adjustment all the players will have to make.

RWD: Those Canadians sure were confused during the exhibition games. "Thaaaat's a penalty, eh?"

DTP: What would be more fun --- me coming to Final Five ... or you coming to Anchorage for a series?

RWD: You coming to the Final Five. The Final Five is Holy Week, Donald. I will at some point come to Anchorage I am sure, but the Final Five is so awesome.

DTP: I meant more fun from your perspective.

RWD: That is my perspective.

DTP: I have no doubt I'd have more fun at the Final Five than I would chauffering you around Anchorage. [Like I would get into a car with Donald. I’ve seen The Bone Collector.]

RWD: On your moose. Or your... what did you call it... snow "machine?"

DTP: You should know that if you're a McCainiac

RWD: He is my hero.

DTP: Lovely.

RWD: Are you sure you want to have that on your blog? Aren't you afraid people might be a little enlightened? [LOOK OUT, LIBERAL MEDIA!!! HERE I AM!!!! A NON-OLD, UTTERLY STUNNING AND BRILLIANT CONSERVATIVE!!!]

DTP: I'm not concerned about your political leanings on my blog. Anything I say overwhelms it. Enlightened and Sarah Palin are not three words you'd normally see together.

RWD: My word is like the word of God.

DTP: Then tell me Yahweh .... what are the final scores this weekend?

RWD: You're done already? That's IT?

DTP: What? ‘Cos I asked the final scores? [Have you not read a Gauntlet before? Freaking amateur!] Don’t assume.

RWD: Okay, then. I was concerned. [I wasn’t done basking in my own self-importance.] 4-3 tUMD, 4-0 tUMD. Jacky with a goal. Fuzzy with 2.
DTP: LOL [Not sure what’s funny.]

RWD: I went above and beyond there.

DTP: Will you be watching on the web?

RWD: Probably. Is that naughty Santa going to be on?

DTP: I don't know who is advertising this year. I don't watch it much ya know. [Oh yah you betcha!]

DTP: How is UAA's stream compared to others?

RWD: It is great compared to any of the crap I see on B2. Like CC's floating tiger head, for example.

DTP: That thing is psychologically damaging I fear. When was the last time you and Bethlyn were stumble-down drunk together?

RWD: We never have been. I don't think I've ever been drunk in her presence.

DTP: Sigh ... boring. [This is not Penthouse Forum, Donald.]

RWD: I know. When I visited her I came down with bronchitis almost immediately upon arrival. So I didn't drink very much. I had like I sip of something. I do not need to drink to have a good time.

DTP: But you're more fun when you do.

RWD: Eh. Possibly. I'm a really mean drunk.

DTP: It's from a Holiday Inn commercial.

RWD: I have a DVR. I don't watch commercials.

DTP: Naturally. Can I ask an Entourage question?

RWD: I don't watch that either. [I think I’d prefer a commercial.]

DTP: Of course. Shouldn't you really just turn into a Gopher fan? I mean ... isn't that how it works down there?

RWD: I don't see the point. I cannot WAIT to see tDogs win their first NC. No Gopher fan can say that. The[ Gophers] are not the Borg. Resistance is not futile. Not as many people in Minneapolis are Gopher hockey fans as you might think. I mean, Donald, if I was going to be a Gopher fan, I would be. I was born (technically) on campus at the UMTC medical center. You can't get any more into the heart of Gopher country than that.

DTP: Hence my question.

RWD: But I grew up a Dogs fan. It's hereditary. I'd be disowned. Also I went to another big 10 school. [MICHIGAN SUCKS!!!!]

DTP: What team do you dislike (hate) most?

RWD: St. Cloud.

DTP: Are you as apathetic as me about Mankato?

RWD: No. I'm semi-pro Mankato. I have a lot of family there. But I can see how someone might be that way.

DTP: I'm trying to work up more hatred for them but I find them boring.

RWD: Juttz sucks. His wife is my idol though. [The mother of all cougars!!!]

DTP: What about UND? Where are they on your list?

RWD: I could not possibly care less about UND. They bore me.

DTP: Denver?

RWD: Denver is a force to be reckoned with this year.

DTP: Colorado College?

RWD: CC had better get on their horse and figure out if they're going to be a great team. Because, um, 1-0 against UAH?

DTP: UAH's goalie stood on his head.

RWD: They will be on the top 3 in the league but they need to transcend to the macrocosm if they're going to go anywhere. Great teams win those games by lots of goals. I am overly critical, but whatever. [What the heck do I care? We will take them down.]

DTP: Are you happy to get a new rink before UAA?

RWD: I am happy to get a new rink sooner rather than later. It would be nice if UAA got one, too, but I didn't feel any competitive vibes.

DTP: I recall you expressing suicide as an alternative if UAA were to get a rink before you guys

RWD: I am prone to hyperbole. And poor memory.

DTP: Ever had chicken-pox?

RWD: Yes, on Christmas. I gave it to my mom, too.

DTP: Ouch... you [female dog].

DTP: Did you cut your bangs to match Sarah's "do"?

RWD: My hair is curly and so it wouldn't really look the same. I'm actually growing it out. I got it cut kind of short when Bethlyn was here in March and felt regret. I'm actually thinking of maybe dying it white like McCain [I would look hot] for solidarity.

DTP: Make sure you use the same dye he does.

RWD: I'm sorry, is this a hockey interview? You're making it seem like I care about politics. This is not an impression I like to give.

DTP: Compare this year’s Bulldog offense to last year’s.

RWD: This year >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> last year. What else can I say? I mean... last year was just sort of a mess.

DTP: Just trying to steer it back to hockey after your politics meltdown. Are the t'dogs a 2 line or 3 line team?
RWD: Right now they are a 2 line team but they will probably become a 3 line team.

DTP: How many games do you think Stalock will play this year?

RWD: Almost all of them. I'm thinking like 40.

DTP: Do you think that will leave the team in a bit of a spot next year if Stalock doesn't return?

RWD: No, I think Brady is going to be a great goalie for us.

DTP: But Sandy won't play him much this year? Wouldn't it be a good idea to play the backup versus UAA this weekend?

RWD: I think Stalock is the horse that Sandy is going to ride. I would have thought we would see Brady last weekend. I wonder what would have happened if we had... [Love you Al, but for reals homey, that was not your best game.]

DTP: UAA goes to UMD to play on the last WCHA weekend this season. Will you be at those games?

RWD: I might. If I have school I won't.

DTP: What is your earliest memory of a Seawolf?

RWD: It's fairly vague. When I was young we would sometimes go up to my grandparents’ cabin on weekends in the winter and we would watch tUMD games on a super old tv. And sometimes those games would involve UAA. Now a whole generation of children will be deprived of that because tUMD is no longer on TV.

DTP: Do you miss Sertie?

RWD: I don't, I think it's great for him to enjoy retirement.

DTP: Does Sertie attend games at the DECC?

RWD: I don't know. Maybe? We're not BFFs.

DTP: Shouldn't that be BFsF?

RWD: No. It's just like when people say RsBI in baseball. I mean, I guess technically I should say BFF.

DTP: lol

RWD: But a "BFF" is kind of a noun, so it's pluralized as is.

DTP: You take the dumb questions so seriously. [If I didn’t take the dumb questions seriously, there would be none to take seriously.]

RWD: I feel strongly about this subject, actually. I can't stand when people type RsBI. Or "ribbies."

DTP: You are truly the Acronym Queen.

RWD: I love them. The Gophers Invite Cupcakes So We Don't Get Embarrassed At Our Own Tournament is just too long to type. GICSWEDGEAOOT is better. It almost says "Swede" in the middle. Damn that's not right.

DTP: Ultra-cool almost.

RWD: GICSWDGEAOOT. There we go.

DTP: I pay "homage" [Why is homage in quotations? I’m sure because Donald is probably pronouncing it in some foreign way.] to your love of acronyms when I can on my blog ... ever notice?

RWD: You have a blog? It's hard to tell what you're writing. You need more white space.

DTP: Yeah I know... all those words are a problem

RWD: The problem is, they are boring. No offense. [Hee]

DTP: None taken. But they aren't boring.

RWD: I'm sure to a Seawolf fan, they might not be.

DTP: They are each useful and important to make the necessary point. I'm all out of prewritten questions.

RWD: Those were prepared in advance???

DTP: A few were.

RWD: Not as easy as it looks, is it? Bow to the master.

DTP: Let me find a mirror. [Gotta look nice when you genuflect!]

RWD: So are you going to continue this interview or what?

DTP: I thought I'd just let you dangle there and decide.

RWD: Man did I ever get off easy.

DTP: Your offense at certain lines of questions kept it short.

RWD: I'm just not overly political. Also, the Gauntlet's main purpose is offense.

DTP: This isn't the Gauntlet. [No you-know-what, Sherlock.] It's a Gauntlet rip-off

RWD: It is.

DTP: It walks like the Gauntlet, it talks like the Gauntlet, but it is not the Gauntlet. Typing Gauntlet three times is hard. [But four is comparatively easier.]

RWD: It doesn't really talk like the Gauntlet.

DTP: More evidence that it is not the gauntlet then eh? [Friggin’ Canadian.] I gots to run to pick up dinner. [Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit, foo!]

RWD: Oh, did someone drive by your house and hit a rodent?

And… scene!