Just Do It

Dear Bulldogs, we have been waiting a long, long time for this. And by we, I mean all of the fans and Bulldog hockey alumni.

Win it for us.

Win it for your coach, Bill Watson. Give him the ring he should have had 27 years ago. And don't take 4 OTs to do it. And good lord, Kenny, stay in the net, because Bulldogs fans cannot handle another fluky DECC hop garbage BS goal and I want to PUKE when I see that Bowling Green banner hanging at the X because THAT SHOULD BE OURS.

Win it for your old captain, Andrew Carroll. The consummate hard worker, who willed himself and his teammates to be better. Win it for him, as vindication for that Miami game.

Win it for Dick Stewart. Win it for his windsock and his dedication to the youth hockey players of Duluth. Win it because you bought your gear from him. Win it because he lost his vision at a Bulldogs game.

Win it for Isaac, for Junior, for Schwabe, Timmay, Hards, Geisler, Unks, for those guys who brought us so close in Boston.

Win it for the students, the ones who make up cheers and signs and drink to the wins and the losses and get the crowd going. Win it for the former runners of the goal lap. Win it for your classmates and your neighbors.

Win it for the DECC. The arena you closed down in style just over four months ago. The arena where Bulldog legends have played. Win it and do something they didn't. Win it and make your mark on both buildings.

Win it for the city of Duluth, the people who voted to give you this beautiful new arena. Win it for AMSoil and hang a banner next October.

Win it for Hoagy. Because there's no one more dedicated, more caring, and more invested in you guys than he is. Win it for all he's given the program for so many years.

Win it for your fans. For those of us who sat through the agony of defeat, through seasons where wins were scarce, through seasons where talent was wasted, through seasons where the highest scorer would finish 8th on the team in points. Win it for those of us who have lost hope and then found it again and again. Win it for those of us who spend hundreds or thousands of dollars to see you play. Win it for those of us who have driven hundreds or thousands of miles to see you play. Win it for people following you all around the world. Win it for the folks who have made total fools of themselves in public, in print, in pictures, and on television. Win it for the fans who are starving for a championship, who have been waiting half a century to see this happen. Win it in the state you play in, the home state for many of you, the adopted home state for others. Win it in front of a crowd that will overwhelmingly support you.

Win it for us. Win it for each other. Win it for yourself. Go get 'em, Dogs.

One Week

Bulldogs fans, can you believe that in one week we'll have witnessed our final game at the DECC?

I can't. I really can't. It's hard to believe the new arena was a dream just a few years ago, one we thought the taxpayers of Duluth would never support. And then it was just a drawing, an artist's rendering that made us start to salivate. We saw it grow over time from a pile of rubble to a skeleton to a full structure, and then some of us were lucky enough to go inside and see it. Our captains have skated on it and I would imagine the rest of the teams have had or will have a chance to skate on it very soon. And on December 30th, we'll have our chance to see it for the first time with the ice in, the video board working, and the seats filled with excited fans.

But the DECC, the current arena is our friend. It has been with us for a lot. Sure, the ceiling is falling apart over section 25, and it gets hot in there very easily, and the concourse is crowded, and the only graphic they have is that old man getting hooked and leaving his eyeballs behind, and the sound system doesn't work sometimes, and the press box is a dump, and it's weirdly-sized, and people have to sit on folding chairs sometimes, and there are no suites, and the students are in a weird spot, and the doors don't shut all the way.

That's all part of its charm. I am really going to miss the DECC. I am going to miss going downstairs and wandering around, running into the other team every once in awhile. I'm going to miss being able to sit right next to the penalty box if I want to. I'm going to miss my little corner where my seats are tucked, so I can stand up there and pace if the weird half-row behind me isn't sold. I'm going to miss the goal lap, and that one step that took out Yager last year. I'm going to miss Walt, who retired last home series. I'm going to miss Dick Stewart sitting right above the band, although I know he'll be waving his windsock wherever he sits. I'm going to miss those funky balcony seats, where I always wanted to sit. I'm going to miss the atmosphere, because it's going to take awhile for the new arena to find it again. I'm going to miss sitting in a rink where Brett Hull, Junior Lessard, Bill Watson, Bill Oleksuk, Bob Mason, Glenn Resch, Tom Kurvers, Norm Maciver, Bah Harrington, Alex Stalock, Huffer Christiansen, Chris Marinucci, Shjon Podein, Matt Niskanen, Mason Raymond, Curt Giles and hundreds of other Bulldogs played hockey, not to mention all the Northland-born hockey players who had high school games or section play-offs there. I'm going to miss the rink where my mom and my dad, my uncles and aunt, my grandparents and my great-grandmother went to games.

This week isn't about AMSoil Arena. There will be years and years to talk about it. This week is about the DECC, a place we'll miss even though it's right next door.

America, Jr.

So, I enjoy making fun of the Canadian university hockey teams, but really, I love Canada. J'aime le Canada! Canada has given me MacGregor Sharp and Evan Schwabe, two of my favorite Guys EVER!! And also Fonzie, and Junior Lessard, and Jamie Russell. Mmmm....

Anyway, Canada also has lots of amazing stuff. Their national anthem is AWESOME. According to Mike it is also the UMD fight song.

Other things about Canada that are awesome:

Childrens programmes:


Junior hockey:


Dapper sportscasters:


Heavy metal gods:


Totally awesome donuts!!!!:


Marty McFly (yes I realize this video is mostly Doc-related but Doc is amazing and also this is freaking funny):


Ice Road Truckers:


And, finally, THE GREATEST TELEVISION SHOW EVER:

Hindsight

In the basement awhile ago, I found a program from the 2003-2004 season. It's kind of amazing. I mean, Justin May has more hair. It's from a January series against Michigan Tech. This was prepared before these guys had any idea they were going to be in the Frozen Four. I mean, yeah, I'm sure they hoped they would, because who doesn't. But they weren't making plans to visit the Freedom Trail and eat at Legal Seafood or anything.

The team photo is laid out really weird. It's not all seniors in the front. Probably because there were only 5 seniors (NO ONE FORGET ABOUT MATT KLEIN. He is very nice and funny!) so Stauffacher is kind of jammed in there (probably because he was an assistant captain) and Beau is sitting in the middle flanked by all the coaches. I've never seen them do a picture in quite this way before. The coaches are not wearing skates, incidentally. Dan Kronick is in the photo and he looks ugly as ever. Couldn't he have put a bag over his head, or worn a veil or something?

I did not know Evan Schwabe was majoring in elementary and middle school education. And Tim Hambly was a math major. You all know how I feel about math.

There's an unintentionally hilarious photo of Park Point, which would be more unintentionally hilarious if it had Junior Lessard in it. (That's for you, Dirty.) There's also this advert for an optometrist that has Champ telling a basketball ref that he needs new glasses. I know it's a basketball ref because Champ is wearing a basketball jersey, and he has a potbelly. It's like middle-aged Champ.

The "Spotlight" feature is on T.J. Caig. It's in English, unlike the last feature I read on ol' Teej. He likes Trevor Linden, Pop-Tarts, and Kurt Cobain. (I wonder if some of the kids on the current team have even heard of Kurt Cobain. TJ is like 10 years older than some of them.)

This was Jamie Russell's first season as the MTU head coach. They had 2 wins at that point in the season. Ah, good old reliable Tech. But one of those wins was against UMD. Hmm. It wasn't even a Tech win, it was a regular 2-pointer!

There is a coupon for a free cup of coffee with a gas fill-up at a Holiday Stationstore. It has no expiration date. I'm clipping it now!

The program ends with a column written by ambiguously-named Jess Myers. He talks about the "New DECC" project. Truly a visionary! He wrote "a myriad of" instead of myriad. Argh. I hate that. But he does mention UMD's raucous road trippers made more noise at Magness than the DU fans. This is unsurprising. It's like a morgue. Except when that high school kid wanted to fight me. He looked like a woodchuck. He picked the Bulldogs to sweep Tech. And he was right!

I really need to hang on to more of these programs. Ahhh, memories!

Standing On Guard For Me

Today is Canada Day! Essentially, this is functions as Canada's "birthday," when the British North America Act was enacted and unified the provinces. I learned that on Wikipedia, which as we know is infallible as a source. While this is not nearly as bada$$$$ as event that we commemorate on the United States' birthday, we here at RWD still want to recognize a holiday that's important to some folks very important to RWD.

We have had a LOT of Canadians come through the DECC and the Duluth Curling Club; 140 to be precise. I counted! But I might be off by one or two. Let me know.

Currently, UMD has 5 returning Canucks on the roster: Brady Lamb (AB), Travis Oleksuk (ON), Cody Danberg (SK), Mike Connolly (AB) and Justin Fontaine (AB). We're also adding two more Canadians this fall: Wade Bergman (AB) and Dylan Olsen (AB, although I think he was born in the U.S.). I love Canadians! They add so much to my roster. A lot of My Guys have been Canadians... I pretty much favor Canadians and Northern Minnesotans, except for Gergy and Curry. Canadians were very good for UMD last year! They scored a lot of points and won a lot of games for us (including some BIG ones in the playoffs!) Canadians scored 63 goals and had 115 assists for 178 of the 344 points the team got.

Some of UMD's most successful alumni are Canadians. In addition to the awesome guys we have on our roster, last year's superstar senior MacGregor Sharp (AB), Hobey Baker winner Lucien Lessard, Jr (QC), WCHA commissioner Bruce McLeod (ON), Bulldog legend Keith "Huffer" Christiansen (ON), TV Analyst Judd Medak (BC), Bulldog daddy Bill Oleksuk (ON), former NHLers Curt Giles (MB), Pat Bouttette (ON), Norm Maciver (ON), and Glenn Resch (SK), UMD assistant coach and Hobey Baker winner Bill Watson (MB), Hall of Famer Brett Hull (BC), current NHLer Mason Raymond (AB), and most importantly, the original My Guy and all-time RWD favorite cutie pie, Evan Schwabe (SK) are ALL Canadians and important players in Bulldog history. Not that the rest of the guys aren't important.

Robby Nolan is Canadian, too. Even though he's not a Bulldog, he's still a very special person to RWD.

Happy Canada Day, everyone!!!!

The Gauntlet: Multimedia Edition

That's right, baby. It's back. Sort of. For the first The Gauntlet of the season, RWD interviewed sometime Bulldog photographer, copy-editor, and mixmaster Larry R.

RWD: So, usually I am better prepared, with planned lines of questioning, but since I'm not out to trap you into admitting something or trying to make you look crazy, I'm not as organized.

Larry: Considering most of the tens [of people reading RWD…] already think I'm nuts, feel free to fire away.

RWD: Tens of people may be exaggerating.

Larry: Well I know I read it, not with any dedication, but I've been there multiple times. [Oooh! That means elevens of readers!]

RWD: Superb! That makes me very happy. Perhaps you could start out by informing my readers who don't know you exactly how you are involved with the UMD hockey program.

Larry: Now my involvement is as a volunteer. I'm available to them as needed for whatever type [of] help they need: stats, photography and operations director for game nights. Back in 1997, I was involved in setting up their music system, and brought full time planned music to games. I did that for 5 years, and now it’s more of a support role. [Isn't Larry the genius behind "Don't Stop Believin'," which has been ripped off by everyone from other sports teams to tSopranos?]

RWD: How long have you been a Bulldogs fan?

Larry: I'm really aging myself, but I've been a fan since 1983. I became a Dogs fan when Mom said I couldn't go to Madison to go to college because it was too big, so I traded Cardinal Red and White in for Maroon and Gold.

RWD: The best choice you've ever made.

Larry: Without a doubt, the friends I've made with my involvement at UMD are priceless. [For buying additional friends, there's MasterCard.]

RWD: Were you a college hockey fan in college?

Larry: I was a freshman in 1985. I waited outside (it was a true camp out back then) the Thursday night before the Monday tickets went on sale. I failed my first collegiate exam because I was out drinking when I should have been studying for a [microeconomics] exam. I was a season ticket holder for four years, and my last year, I worked for the Sports Info Office, so I didn't need a ticket.

RWD: So that's a yes.

Larry: Definitely. I think I missed a total of 6 home games in 5 years.

RWD: 5 years is a bit accelerated compared to some current tUMD fans. [RWD included!]

Larry: I was ready to go. 1987-1990 weren't the best hockey years. Seriously, I love Dale Jago, but top scorer?

RWD: I'll just note that here... *man-love for Dale Jago*

Larry: I'm sure his wife will appreciate that.

RWD: Are the college years a bit of a blur for you, or do you have some outstanding memories of Great Moments in Bulldog History?

Larry: I don't have my media guide within reach to cheat, so I'm all on my own. It started so strong with Hull. Just to watch him skate was amazing. I remember a shot that he took from the blue line that hit behind the top rows at the top of the DECC and bounced back to where the Zamboni comes out. It might have broken the safety net; it was that hard. After that, you know the team trended down, so it wasn't a great set of years to be there. We had some fun, I traveled a lot to the away games, but there were certainly more nights drinking over losses than partying over winning… It was different back then, the team had house parties and they lived at the Warehouse, so it was never a boring time.

RWD: Team house parties! Sounds exciting! [It must have been much easier to be a stalker back then.] Where was this "Warehouse" located?

Larry: One of the many Park Point Hotels is now occupying its place. It was right next to the Burger King that used to be on Park Point. It was "THE" college bar during the time I was in school. Grandma's was for the upscale kids and where girls went because they didn't want to get spilled on. Everyone else was at the Warehouse.

RWD: I would definitely be at the Warehouse. [Getting Old Milwaukee dumped on me and getting confused for a guy, obvs.]

Larry: You would have been right at home there. It was definitely a tPB type of place.

RWD: Would you say there was more interest in Bulldog hockey back then (both in the community and among students), or less?

Larry: I think it has followed the same course it does today. 1984-86 there would be people scalping tickets outside, much like the end of 2004 and to some extent 2005. But when the team isn't winning, the interest goes down. My first senior year, nobody waited in line for student season tickets.

RWD: It goes in cycles, I suppose. It would be nice if those winning cycles were longer.

Larry: I think that everyone wishes that. I'd be happy to finish in the top 5 every year. In this league that is all you can ask for.

RWD: So after college, did you stay in Duluth or double-cross it back to Wisconsin?

Larry: I left for 6 years, moved a lot working for a company in Wisconsin, but they opened an office in Duluth and I moved back [for awhile].

RWD: Do you still cheer for Bucky, or have you seen the light?

Larry: I [currently] live about 90 minutes from Madison, and so I still cheer for them when they don't play the Dogs, but you won't see me in any Wisconsin hockey gear anytime soon. I'm a huge Badger Football and Basketball fan. But part of that comes from the fact there is absolutely no way you will every see me with an M on shirt.

RWD: So you save your real hatred for UMTC.

Larry: I have absolutely no love for their program at all.

RWD: Back when you were in college, who were some of your favorites (other than your bf Dale)?

Larry: Hull, of course, but I was more a fan of the working class guys. Joe DeLisle will probably be one of my all time favorite players.

RWD: When did you start doing photography for the games?

Larry: I traveled with the team in 2004 to Boston, and I had my camera there. In 2005, I got a call from Jess Myers (who was working for Inside College Hockey) asking if I could shoot a game, and I've been covering for them ever since.

RWD: Who do/did you enjoy photographing the most?

Larry: I like shooting goaltenders [I agree, I sometimes feel like shooting goaltenders, too.]; they provide the best action shots. Alex is a lot of fun to shoot because he is so mobile. Elliott from Wisconsin always seemed to come up big, and Lamoureux from North Dakota provided a great shot that ended up being a save that was ESPN's play of the day during the Frozen Four. I have that as a poster that I'm waiting to get signed. [Larry = the ultimate Fan Boy.]

RWD: Are most of the photos from the Bulldogs' site your own?

Larry: The school has an official photographer, so most are his. I try to schedule my trips home when he isn't there so I can get something up on the web.

RWD: Do you ever do photos for the DNT?

Larry: I do some freelance for them; I do some work when they don't have coverage and I'm in town or if they are on the road, I'll send pictures up.

RWD: You would think they would have a staff photographer just for the Bulldogs.

Larry: Their sports department is pretty small and they have a huge area to cover. Budgets just don't allow them to keep someone like that on staff.

RWD: I just laughed. What exactly are they covering that's more important than the Bulldogs? Smelt fishing? [No offense, DA and Gramps.]

Larry: I'm sure they spend a great deal of time covering things like the DHW [Drunk Hockey Walk] [Brilliant! I couldn't think of a better use of resources. Except that nothing I do on the DHW is anything I'd want documented for the public domain]. That goes in cycles too. When they win, they get more coverage. When I was in Boston, they had 3 people out there, so keep winning is the rule to better coverage. That’s why the women’s team gets its fair share.

RWD: Oh man, you touched on the hot button issue. [Bracing for impact.]

Larry: I am usually on the wrong side of that issue.

RWD: I don't have an issue with women's hockey, other than no checking. Who would you say are some of your current favorite Bulldogs? Or are you going to Ciskie-out and say all of them?

Larry: Nah. I don't have to deal with them on a daily basis or need them to keep a talk show running. Do I get bonus points for Mr. Curry? Jason Garrison is one of them, I was a big Bryan McGregor fan (they'll miss him) and I like Alex because he is so unpredictable.

RWD: Well, don't lie. If you don't like Curry, don't say you do to suck up to me. Not that anyone could NOT like him.

Larry: Not knowing what you like about him aside, he is a great presence on the ice, and I like how he works. And if he ever gets paired up in the penalty box, you can learn a lot why he gets under peoples skin.

RWD: I'm a fan of that. Everything he does it seems is designed to irritate someone.

Larry: He’s a lot like Stauffacher, except bigger. [Um, like a whole freaking foot bigger.]

RWD: I'm surprised you would find "unpredictability" in a goaltender "likeable." [I'm sure Scott Sandelin thinks it's a laugh riot.]

Larry: That’s the photographer talking. My dad would like him to be more predictable.

RWD: How about your all-time Bulldog favorites?

Larry: Hull, Podein, DeLisle, Plante, Lessard (love the accent).

RWD: What do you think about Junior's professional situation?

Larry: He has enough talent to play in the league. I'm not an expert on NHL clubs and their needs, but he could be an every day player for someone.

RWD: Evidently no one felt that way, as he cleared waivers and will be in the AHL. [With the extremely sexy Chris Conner.]

Larry: Hopefully he'll end up in Milwaukee and I can go see him play. I'll drop $12 a night to go watch him skate.

RWD: If you were the coach of the Bulldogs, what would you do differently?

Larry: Not that Scott needs my help, but I'd really like to see two things: get someone who isn't afraid to crash the offensive zone with the puck, and I'd really like to see them try something different with the power play. [NO FREAKING KIDDING. Maybe they need to try a little more cowbell.]

RWD: That was a nice roundabout way of seeing where you stand on the coaching issue.

Larry: He has a tough job, and I imagine there is some real pressure on him to win. I think losing Nisky is the big loss, my understanding that while UMD may miss the scoring touch, they'll be better off as a team without Raymond.

RWD: Wow, can I print that without being sued for libel?

[some stuff]

RWD: Most Bulldogs fans have two outlooks to the season: what they hope will happen, and what they believe will happen. The two rarely align. What are your predictions and hopes?

Larry: As a lifelong Packer fan, I know how that goes. I think they finish 5th, and end up making it to the WCHAs. I always hope they make a run, because it makes the post season more fun when you have somebody to cheer for at the rink.

RWD: So you think, realistically, they are going to be 5th in tWCHA? [As you can probably tell, I'm still trying to wrap my mind around this.]

Larry: I think they have a shot at it. Alex is going to have to carry the team, and he does have the talent. If the team gets off to a good start, they have the ability to catch people. If the team comes out as a team, they'll be able to string some wins together, and that will give them the confidence they need to be successful. But then, I was always the [delusional] optimistic guy.

RWD: To wrap things up, as this could go on all night, I'll open it up to any comments you want to make about Bulldog hockey.

Larry: I think the Dogs will surprise some people this year. I'm excited for the year, The Superior Cup with some teams that used to be good rivals, and a league that is always stacked with talent. If they get some league wins early they can position themselves for a playoff run. Unfortunately, the schedule at the end of the year is a big test. But that’s when you'll see what character they have.

RWD: Any bold predictions, or "calls" as Bert Blyleven says?

Larry: Wisconsin wins the league in a runaway. The three first round picks that they have make them a force to be dealt with right away. That being said, they probably finish 4th.

RWD: Whoa, it's not a call unless you believe it's going to happen. No qualifiers. No reneging.

Larry: I believe they have the ability to run away with the league. But, if reality sets in...

RWD: Who's your breakout player of the year for tDogs?

Larry: Put your money on Michael Gergen. [I have none, thanks for reminding me.] I think he has the most to gain from Raymond leaving early. If he steps up and takes the offensive role that they brought him in with, watch out.

RWD: Ooh, he is My Guy, other than Curry. Most Impactful Freshman?

Larry: Evan Oberg. He'll step up and replace Nisky right away. Close second for Cody Danberg if he stays healthy.

RWD: Larry's Personal Player of the Year?

Larry: Andrew Carroll. He provides the leadership and will lead the team in points.

RWD: Well, that's the good word.

I can't believe I friggin' forgot to ask him who the hottest Bulldog was!

My Super Ex-Bulldogs

Okay, this part may be total garbage, but exciting news!

Matt Niskanen made the lineup for the Dallas Stars and will be playing tomorrow night! YOU SEE, PEOPLE! This is what HAPPENS when you are My Guy of the Year. FAME AND GLORY. I know I'll be watching Vs tomorrow night.

Additionally, Mason Raymond is slated to play on a line with the Swedish Twins. All I can think of is that commercial where the Sedins were hired for that bachelor party and they brought a crappy boombox and tentatively started doing the cabbage patch.

The Gauntlet: Filthy Edition

Not only is this Gauntlet rife with Authentic Frontier Gibberish, but it has more inside jokes than ever before. Here we go!

RWD: Okay let's do this. It's on like a beer bong (to quote Jonathon Toews).

Dirty: That was an imposter Toews in that picture.

RWD: I'm sure it was his stunt double.

Dirty: Exactly. Don't you wish UMD was good enough to have stunt doubles for their players? [No, because stunt doubles are for people who can’t do their own dirty work.] Junior Lessard really could've used one a couple years ago when he went swimming.

RWD: Oooh! [That one hurt!] This is not a normal Gauntlet, though, folks. Normally, I interview fans from the opposing team. But this week, Michigan Tech fan Dirty is in the hot seat. [Read all about it here.]

Dirty: Quite the miracle that Duluth was finally able to beat my Huskies this year at the DECC. You guys gonna hang a banner for that?

RWD: We are not St. Cloud. So, no.

Dirty: Touche. you'd have home ice if you were

RWD: I'm cool with that. Home ice isn't a necessity. UMD will not have home ice this weekend and will still provide a beat down on UND.

Dirty: That was last week with the women's team. Speaking of which, Sandy will be welcomed back with open arms to coach our womens team. He'll probably get a raise by coming back here.

RWD: Ah, so you're settling for Sandelin since you can't have Blais?

Dirty: UND can have Blais if they wanted [Yeah, I’m so sure that’s true], but we all feel bad for Sandy. We want to help raise his self-confidence again. Having to coach UMD really kills it.

RWD: I think the UND women's team record is actually worse than the UMD men's team, by a game or two. But the gals are in a rebuilding year, right?

Dirty: Have been for 5 years.

RWD: I could have sworn you were a Fighting Sioux fan, but the MTU-UMD series at tDECC shot down that rumor. Is it because you're like most UND fans, who are unsatisfied with anything less than an undefeated record and a national championship?

Dirty: Ooo? Does this mean I get to rip on all the moron Sioux fans? Awesome. I hate them with a passion. Hakstol should have been fired every year according to those idiots. They should all be beaten with a mukluk. [Mukluk. Noun. 1. A sealskin or reindeer-skin boot worn by Eskimos. 2. A boot often of duck with a soft leather sole and worn over several pairs of socks.]

RWD: I have the NCAA on speed dial, so watch what you say. How much money did you make selling "I'm not hostile and abusive" t-shirts, sweatshirts, thongs, etc?

Dirty: Much less money than I made on my Oshie shirts.

RWD: Oshie shirts?

Dirty: [Yeah right, like I’m really going to put a link in and let you make money off my site. But, they say “Got Oshie?”]

RWD: Well, next year they'll be 80% off. [UND won’t “Got Oshie?” after this season.] You are more scandalous than Lindsay Lohan, what with your recent USCHO suspension. Enlighten us on how that went down.

Dirty: MeanEgirl told me to die so I told her she's an embarassment to Tech (I should know). Obviously I'm the one who should have gotten suspended.

RWD: What was the "official reason?"

Dirty: I was trolling on the Bemidji State to the WCHA thread.

RWD: I guess in that manner, you are probably trolling about 90% of the time on USCHO. Do they pay you per post?

Dirty: Board hates me. I think they'd pay me not to post.

RWD: I mean, the only way you could get me to have 37,000 posts on a message board is for money. I wouldn't have the time otherwise.

Dirty: You bring up a good point. I should start charging. I give my brilliance [um, yeah, that’s the word] away for free. That's pretty silly of me.

RWD: You might be able to move out of Mom and Dad's basement that way, no?

Dirty: You obviously have poor sources if you think I live there. You should probably work on that.

RWD: It seems to be the general consensus on Teh Internet. But that's what The Gauntlet is about. Uncovering the Truth. [Like Fox 9 News, baby!] Why not parlay all that brilliance into The Dirty Blog? I'm surprised there isn't one.

Dirty: Where would I find the time? I've got 37,000 posts.

RWD: Well, right, instead of those posts... [Do I have to hold his freaking hand? Why doesn't he see the connection?] What do you think of the blogs around the WCHA?

Dirty: I don't read them much. I only read books recommended by Levar Burton on Reading Rainbow.

RWD: Is that because you had a bad experience with a certain blogger? The one who stole your USCHO girlfriend?

Dirty: Nope. She hated me for me. It had nothing to do with Maize. [Aka the writer behind Western College Hockey.]

RWD: Ouch. That's much worse. And now, Casey Borer has stolen [MeanEgirl].

Dirty: We both know Casey is just humoring MEg. I'm still golden.

RWD: Maybe USCHO is not the best place for meeting women... Unless you are Rabid Husky.

Dirty: Rabib's Woman with the bag over her head is HOT!

RWD: I would like to know why you are called Dirty. I mean, who voluntarily calls themselves Dirty? [Possibly someone who thinks Rabid’s Lady is hot?] Are you a Christina Aguilera fan?

Dirty: It's what the older kids called me in the neighborhood when I was younger.

RWD: Because you were... a neat freak?

Dirty: It went well with my name or something. I just went with it so I didn't get beat up.

RWD: When did you become a Fighting Sioux fan?

Dirty: When I went to my first game and watched the Hrkac Circus light up UMD. The students littered the ice with plastic cups.

RWD: I find it hard to believe that your first game was against UMD.

Dirty: It was.

RWD: Yeah right. You’re saying that for dramatic effect.

Dirty: My parents didn't have season tickets and we only went to like one game a year [with tickets] that they got from my mom's co-worker. I wanted to get a Hrkac button but they were sold out and I got stuck with Russ Romaniuk one.

RWD: Were you wearing the cape way back then?

Dirty: Nope. I stole the cape idea from a Canadian fan who was at the WJC [in 2004/2005].

RWD: Why not go all out and wear white underpants over green tights, too?

Dirty: I just might do that next year.

RWD: Which UND player would look the best in that get-up? (Meaning, who is the hottest hottie?)

Dirty: What kind of silly question is that? [T.J.] Oshie. DUH.

RWD: I knew it. Has TJ replaced Andy Schneider in your heart?

Dirty: He did that long ago. He can stop hurricanes simply by glaring at them. Schneider can't even compare. [Somewhere, Andy Schneider is crying. Or, sighing with relief.]

RWD: Mason Raymond is so fast, he can skate around the world and punch himself in the back of the head. Who are your favorite players, other than TJ and Andy? Current and all-time.

Dirty: Jeff Panzer, Mike Commodore and Mike Prpich. [So he only likes Oshie from the current squad?]

RWD: You tend to like guys with interesting hair.

Dirty: Of course. It makes them stand out.

RWD: I heard a rumor [from Meg]. I heard you work for the enemy. She said you work for NDSU.

Dirty: I work on the NDSUcks campus, but don't work for NDSU. It's a subtle but very important distinction.

RWD: Why exactly do the Bison suck?

Dirty: They are hostile and abusive towards Sioux.

RWD: Like Red Baron pizza?

Dirty: Exactly like that.

RWD: Well, how about a weekend prediction for us?

Dirty: Toews singlehandedly outscores UMD.

RWD: I guess it doesn't have to be an accurate prediction.

The Gauntlet: Killing The Radio Star Edition

This week, The Gauntlet returns with a vengeance...

Okay, maybe not a vengeance, since this is another "Friendly Fire" incident. This week, RWD threw down the glove to Bruce Ciskie, UMD Radio Guy, former USCHO Poster, and Purse Snatcher.

RWD: Hold on, must find notebook with questions.

Ciskie: Uh oh... you wrote them down?

RWD: Weeks ago.

Ciskie: I'm marginally impressed.

RWD: Seriously, what do you take me for? What about my blog would ever make you think I am anything other than a serious journalist with the highest standards of integrity?

Ciskie: I'll be more impressed after I find out what the questions are.

RWD: I think my questions will be better than "What's in your iPod?" I already know it's country. Did you have a nice christmas?

Ciskie: Absolutely. I can never complain about a new PS2 game and seeing my kid happily ripping open his mom's presents because he apparently didn't get enough of his own. [Bruce won't be winning Father Of The Year any time soon.]

RWD: I was going to ask if there was a Mrs. Bruce Ciskie, but you've already answered that.

Ciskie: Yeah, there is, and she's really the one who jump-started my hockey obsession. I was only a casual fan until our second date, which happened to be the 1998 UMD-[UMTC] playoff game that everyone SWEARS they were at. I was, and I now own a DVD of it thanks to some really nice UMD fan in the Twin Cities.

RWD: Do you know that the only people who have answered yes to the "is there a Mr/Mrs [your name here]" question are UMD fans?

Ciskie: Really?

RWD: Really. So you have been following tDogs since 1998? Or before?

Ciskie: Slightly before. I had gone to a few games before that 1998 playoff game, but it wasn't enough to hook me. We went to the Saturday game of the playoff series, and I have a vague memory of a fight or some sort of skirmish happening late in the game (a Gopher shutout win). No matter what it was, it was enough for me to make it clear that we were going to the Sunday night game. After that, I was hooked on college hockey. I also remember listening to the 1984 title game with Bowling Green on the radio, even though I was supposed to be sleeping. I didn't know anything about hockey at the time, but I knew it was a big deal so I listened (BANDWAGON!). I turned it off before the fourth overtime because I couldn't stay awake anymore (I was six at the time).

RWD: I suppose the players make you feel really old.

Ciskie: All of them except Geris.

RWD: "So, Jordan Fulton, how was your senior year of high school... LAST YEAR?"

Ciskie: Well, there's that. I don't really think about the age gap with the guys that much, though there will sometimes be conversations where I come away feeling old.

RWD: Mentally I'm sure there's no age gap.

Ciskie: Actually, they're probably older than I am in that regard.

RWD: Let's talk about the players. Who's the hottest Bulldog?

Ciskie: Can I cheat on this one?

RWD: NO! No one's WIFE! No CHEERLEADERS!

Ciskie: I don't think any of the players are married, so I can apparently choose a girlfriend.

RWD: NO! [extremely long pause] For crying out loud! This is taking too long!

Ciskie: You're asking a guy who the hottest Bulldog is... really, did you expect a quick response?

RWD: [After another extremely long pause, when it becomes evident that Bruce is using a lifeline.] Have you decided who is the hottest?

Ciskie: Mrs. Ciskie says if she had to pick she'd pick Sharp or Gawryletz.

RWD: But Bruce, I know you've seen them shirtless! Who has the best body? Maybe some of them are butterfaces.

Ciskie: I think you're misunderstanding the nature of my job. I don't need to interview them in the shower.

RWD: You don't need to.

Ciskie: Nor do I want to.

RWD: I'm torn between editing this out because I look like a jersey chaser, and leaving it in, because it is so funny.

Ciskie: I do know enough about sports to know that the goalies are typically the best athletes on the team, so if you're looking for the best body, you should probably start there. [Translation: Ciskie wants Stalock.]

RWD: What is Judd like? Is he dreamy?

Ciskie: You mean Medak or Hirsch? I'm sure his wife finds him very attractive and that's all that matters. He's a great guy, very knowledgeable about hockey, and the best part about him is that he's not afraid to be critical when conditions warrant. Some color guys are afraid to say anything that could be construed as critical of the home team.

RWD: I know that you're very restrained in that area, especially about the refs.

Ciskie: I'm always nice to the officials.

RWD: We'll return to that.

Ciskie: I'm sure we will.

RWD: Why doesn't Judd go on the road with you?

Ciskie: It was something we had put in place probably 10 years ago. I've never really asked anyone about it, but it seems to me that it really wasn't financially smart to have a second person go on the road for these longer trips especially.

RWD: Don't you get bored?

Ciskie: I had about five years of experience doing high school hockey games before I got the UMD job, and almost every game I did was by myself. In all honesty, I don't think much about it unless the game is REALLY bad. The weird thing is that I can flip the switch when we go home. I don't make Judd sit there for a half hour not able to say anything because I won't shut up.

RWD: What happened to Fan in the Stands? I wanted to win a pizza from the Lakeview Castle

Ciskie: There really wasn't much demand for it, so we decided to use that time in the pregame to actually talk about hockey. It wasn't easy to drop it, but I didn't want to put a cap on everything else we do in the pregame (I think it's more important to not have to cut Sandelin off).

RWD: I thought it was between periods.

Ciskie: It was, but without doing it in the pregame, it was asking a lot to have someone come down to the rink just for that purpose. If we had a three-man booth, we could just send that third person downstairs for that.

RWD: So you have a new feature instead: Email the Booth. Does anyone other than me use it?

Ciskie: Not as much as I had hoped. It was something that a few Twin Cities fans had asked me to do, and when I was going over feedback and trying to figure out what we could add to the broadcasts for 06-07, I decided it was something we could do. The response hasn't met the prior demand. It also stinks that I don't have a laptop and we can only do it for home games.

RWD: I've been trying to help you out, but it's hard to think of questions.

Ciskie: And I appreciate that. Just make random comments about what Judd and I are saying. It's all about interaction. It doesn't have to be anything perceptive about the game itself.

RWD: I'm surprised more people don't. There are plenty of people listening.

Ciskie: I am, too. I know.

RWD: I should ask a dumb question...

Ciskie: Go ahead.

RWD: ...to make people feel better.

Ciskie: No such thing as a dumb question.

RWD: No, I mean on the air.

Ciskie: Oh.

RWD: Not now. Then people will be like, okay, yeah, I don't have to be brilliant. Speaking of questions: the coach's show. Why can't I get it on the radio?

Ciskie: Because some idiot isn't turning on the internet switch.

RWD: I want to listen tomorrow. Are you going to ask about Mike Dorr?

Ciskie: You know we can't talk about recruits.

RWD: At all?

Ciskie: Not until they sign.

RWD: Lame.

Ciskie: If I asked a question about Mike Dorr right now, I'd get a mystified stare and some sort of physical signal that it's time to move on to a different topic.

RWD: At least you can get on USCHO and tPB and read about it. Speaking of USCHO, what do you say to rumors that you stole an old lady's purse and ran into a gay bar?

Ciskie: There could be some exaggerations there.

RWD: The lady may have been younger than originally thought. The best post on that thread was "Judd? Is that you?"

Ciskie: The alarm went off in my head when that thread went up. I knew it was time to disappear.

RWD: Is it hard to go from being a fan to being more professional?

Ciskie: I don't care if people talk about me, but the only other D1 announcer who has gotten his own thread is Doug Woog, and I'm so far away from his league that it's not even funny. It's tough. I still enjoy hanging around in the Cafe because there are actually people there that I have met and gotten to know a little bit. But it turned into a no-brainer to get away from the D1 board and stop getting sucked into dumb conversations that I don't need to get sucked into anymore. [Which is essentially the entire experience at USCHO.] About the toughest thing with this job is shedding the emotions of being a fan, because those never truly go away. I want UMD to win every game, and I want nothing but the best for this group of kids because they are such good kids, but I have to set at least a chunk of those feelings aside on game nights. I was proud of myself on Saturday for staying away from the officials until they called that major on Sharp.

RWD: How many Christmas cards did you receive from officials this year?

Ciskie: Brett Klosowski still talks to me. In fact, he's the saintly one who explained the attainable pass rule to me. Of course, I had to think about it for a month before I understood it.

RWD: I'll take that as "zero."

Ciskie: Same number as what I sent out to them. But in all seriousness, I like brett and I'm glad he's in our league now. It's a tough job, and frankly i'm not sure there are a ton of great officials in college hockey right now. I think the problem, if there is one, really only has one fully effective solution: full time officials, and it's just not feasible for these leagues or the NCAA in general to do something like that. Until someone finds the money to make a full time officials system more economical, we have to live with what we have, which is an imperfect system run by humans. [Bruce clearly wants this world to be run by DAMN DIRTY APES!]

RWD: I see you spend a lot of time thinking about this.

Ciskie: When you're driving by yourself to and from some of the stops in the WCHA, you think about a lot of stuff.

RWD: That makes you sound like you're headed for the padded cell.

Ciskie: Wouldn't surprise me. I think there's a special wing there for radio people, and I've spent more than 10 years in radio.

RWD: What is the best road trip you've been on?

Ciskie: Best road trip? Colorado Springs last year or Florida. I can't pick. The TV guys and I took a drive up Pike's Peak on the Saturday of the Colorado trip, and then we won that weird game where CC outshot us like 274-9 but Isaac stood on his head. Florida was cool because I got to hang out with my old buddy Chris Long and I walked into the Gulf of Mexico and called my wife in her office. Alaska is a trip that every fan should try to make at least once.

RWD: Alaska would be fun. I could meet Donald. Armageddon would probably come.

Ciskie: I've not met Donald. Donald knows where I sit at the Sullivan, and I'm deeply offended that he's never popped over to say hello. Sully isn't like some places where they have an actual press box. Fans walk behind me and around me to get to their seats, so I can be talked to by any random fan who wants to strike up a conversation.

RWD: I could hear you on the UAA video webcast.

Ciskie: I heard about that. Last year, Justin May swore he could hear me on the other side of the arena (the video guy sits across the rink from where the radio guys are).

RWD: Isn't Justin May the strength and conditioning coach?

Ciskie: Yeah, but he handled the video stuff last year.

RWD: Wow, a renaissance man. What's the best game you've called so far?

Ciskie: You mean quality of the game or quality of the broadcast?

RWD: Your favorite moment in Bulldog broadcasting history.

Ciskie: Probably McKnight's game winner in Mankato last year. It was a sweet goal because 1) it took about an hour to trickle across the goal line, and 2) I had no idea who was camped out in front of the net, so I just said "IT'S IN THE NET, AND THE DOGS WIN IT!"

RWD: I thought "AND HERE COME THE TEDDY BEARS" was possibly the greatest thing you've ever said. It sounded like we were being invaded.

Ciskie: That one's up there, too. McFarland's first goal was fun, too.

RWD: Well, not his first.

Ciskie: Well, the first one I got to call.

RWD: The first one that wasn't NOT COUNTED or RECREDITED.

Ciskie: Right. Though, it's worth noting that from a "quality of the goal call" standpoint, the one they stole from him in St. Cloud last year was much better.

RWD: When are you interviewing Mike Curry?

Ciskie: Already did.

RWD: WHAT? WHEN?

Ciskie: I think it was during the Tech series.

RWD: Because he scores a lot in Michigan, right. AND I MISSED IT!

Ciskie: Yeah and he had been playing really well the last couple weekends before that trip, so it seemed like an easy decision.

RWD: He is still playing really well.

Ciskie: Yeah, he's really stepped it up. That whole line has. You know the McFarland story and Greer has a career high for goals already.

RWD: People mocked me last year, they were like "How can you like him? All he does is take penalties." But now he is doing well, and staying mostly out of the box.

Ciskie: Curry is a force when he uses his reach. He's not the quickest cat on the ice, but he is physical and he has longer arms than Yao Ming.

RWD: He needs to meet Mark Parrish and learn from the master. They could be the same type of player.

Ciskie: Yeah, I can see that. Mark Parrish is cool.

RWD: Camp out in front of the net in his "office" as those TV dorks say.

Ciskie: I HATE that. It started with Gretzky behind the net.

RWD: Well, we are incapable of going to the net hard, it seems, so someone has to be there when we take an annoying shot from far away. Who are your favorite Bulldogs? Current and All-Time?

Ciskie: Current: all of them. All time: [Brett] Hull, [Bill] Watson, [Lucien] Lessard, [Derek] Plante, [Judd] Medak [obvs sucking up to Judd here], [Beau] Geisler, [The Alaskan Assassin] Todd Smith, and Steve Rodberg makes honorable mention for that fight with Erik Jensen of Wisconsin. Frankly, I do like pretty much all of [the current players], it's about as good a group of kids as anyone could ask to hang around.

RWD: I like them all too, but I have my guys, of course. I'm visiting Duluth for the Northern series, and bringing some random people with me. What would you suggest visiting fans do in Duluth?

Ciskie: The aquarium is cool if it's too cold to walk around the zoo.

RWD: The zoo? We are all adults.

Ciskie: It's winter in Duluth, so unless you want to walk them around the mall there isn't much.

RWD: It's winter in Duluth??? GASP!

Ciskie: Take them skiing or something.

RWD: What about eating?

Ciskie: Old Chicago, Timberlodge, Ground Round, Grandma's, Big Daddy's. (Aren't you going to ask me what's in my IPod? )

RWD: COUNTRY! How about a weekend prediction for us?

Ciskie: 4-2, 4-3.

RWD: Mike Curry hat trick?

Ciskie: no, but he'll have another four-point weekend, and UMD will get their first two-game sweep since, um, i don't know when. I yearn for not having to watch visiting team fans celebrating a sweep in the DECC, so this weekend will be fun.

RWD: Especially with your nemesis in attendance. She already saw them sweep at UND. She is overconfident.

Ciskie: I have no nemesis... she is also like four feet tall, so I hope she brings her high chair so she can watch the games.

RWD: Any New Year's resolutions?

Ciskie: I don't want to be fat anymore. I want to continue trying to be less mean to the officials. I want to keep getting better at my job.

RWD: It's radio, no one has to know...

Ciskie: Yeah, but airplane seats aren't comfortable when you are 6'4 and [come on, Bruce, no one really wants to know how much you weigh].

RWD: Ask Justin May for tips, if he isn't too busy de-worming orphans and solving a Rubik's Cube with his feet.

Ciskie: Justin could probably kill me if I ever worked out with him.

RWD: Or by just looking at you wrong. Is he hot?

Ciskie: Mrs. Ciskie is unavailable for comment. She's on a conference call for work.

Well, there you have it. The first The Gauntlet of 2007, albeit a lite version.

The Gauntlet: The Lite Version

I don't actually know anyone from Bemidji who blogs or is a fan, other than The Hottest Girl in Alary's, but she has been converted to a 'Dogs fan, so this week's The Gauntlet features yet another notorious USCHO poster, DrunkHockeyGuy. Penalty Box Captain, UMD Fan Extraordinaire, and First Class Drinker. This is not your typical The Gauntlet, because he's not a member of the enemy fanbase, but here's the interview. Also, the interview is short because Mrs. DHG needed the computer, so he had to go.

RWD: You founded the Penalty Box while you were in school, right?

DHG: True. [This makes it seem like he is taking a lie detector test or something, but ok.]

RWD: How did you get it started? what was it like to start out with? Just you and Beersong yelling stuff at games?

DHG: Actually I didn't meet Beersong until my 1st of 2 senior years.

RWD: Really? I wouldn't have guessed.

DHG: The first three years we were just a student section that had foul mouths and only had about 100 students at the games. I was always loud, and after my sophomore year, I decided to clean the language up due to some little kid asking me for my autograph. [Here's some necessary DHG background for you people.] I started college in the fall of 1999 and graduated the spring of 2004, so I was there 5 years, not the 8 people like to say. [Exaggeration is how legends are born.] So the first 3 years were just me and some guys I knew from [Duluth Central] high school. We hated each other in high school and started going to games together and became best friends. From there I met Sando and his roommates at games my sophomore year. [In case you were unaware, Sando is another Penalty Box original.] Another tidbit to throw in: I had only drank 4 times in my life before I turned 21, and got the nickname Drunkhockeyguy after the 1st game of the year when I was 100% sober. They figured I was drunk because I was so vulgar. So about a month into the hockey season I figured I had better live up to the name.

RWD: It's obviously been expensive for you to be a fan, going on all those road trips. What's the best place to go on a road trip?

DHG: Wow, that is a tough one. I have been everywhere except CC and UAA, so I am pretty well versed. I would say my favorite driving trip would be Mankato, for several reasons. Mankato is where the Penalty Box was officially founded, it is where we met Beersong, and the bar Chevy's we go to and Mettler's (the nudie bar next door) are great. We met the bartenders and they are the owners sons, so they look forward to seeing us every year. On top of all that, they serve booze in the arena, which is 522 steps from the hotel and bar we stay at, and us UMD fans usually own their rink.

RWD: I have been asked to go down to mankato, with the promise of booze at the arena, but I can't make it. What's your favorite single road trip?

DHG: Denver, the year of the Frozen 4 run. 6 of us drove 18 hours out there. We got to the hotel at 2pm Thursday. We pulled in right as the team bus from the airport drove in. They had only flown for 2 hours. Beersong, Heiz, and myself got pretty lit at the bar that night and a certain UMD coach, no names of course, picked up our entire tab. We ended up sweeping Denver. They pulled Berkhoel in the 2nd period of Friday night's game and he broke his stick on the net and skated backwards staring us down the whole way to the bench. He wanted to kick my [badonkadonk] at the bar Saturday night. I guess Berkhoel got the last laugh though, [ILLEGITIMATE CHILD]!

RWD: What was your favorite moment as a fan?

DHG: My claim to fame had to be my freshman or sophmore year, (it is all a blur). We used to be on the redline in section 14. The penalty box was right below us. So Dany Heatly of Wisconsin, now of the the Ottawa Senators was in the box with the 'Dogs up 2-1 with 3 minutes to play. I ran down to taunt him and he UNLOADED an entire water bottle on my face. He then came out of the box and scored the game tying and winning goals in the next 2 minutes. As he scored the game winner he skated by me and waved. I gave him the international signal for hello!

RWD: Dany Heatly isn't all there upstairs. One of my friends had a class with him. She said he used to rock out to music... but wasn't wearing any headphones. Let me ask you about what I'm sure is one of your low points as a fan.. the "over-rated" incident.

DHG: Yes, this was disappointing. I will stand firmly to this day that what was taking place on the ice that night and what we could all see was going to happen the rest of the year was disgusting. The smart thing would have been to just boo, not cheer, or just leave. Instead in a drunken haze someone said in my ear "We are overrated," so I stupidly start chanting it and of course plenty joined in. I do believe as a paying fan I have the right to voice my displeasure, but as the hardcore fan that I am that wasn't the way to voice it.

RWD: I have always been impressed that you called the pregame show to apologize.

DHG: I personally sent an email to the coaching staff and the entire team. One of the players emailed me back telling me they were pissed but would get over it in time.

RWD: so it really had an impact on the team?

DHG: Well, they were kinda pissed but they got over it.

RWD: That was back in the Kerry Rodd days. Now we have Bruce. Whom do you like better?

DHG: To be honest, I was a fan of Kerry Rodd. I think Bruce does a great job, but you have to remember for 6 years when we couldn't see the game live it was Kerry we heard. So I associate Kerry Rodd's voice with UMD hockey. It is like having someone other than Marv Albert calling games for the Knicks or Bulls. Whatever team he does. [That would be the Knicks, although evidently he doesn't announce for them anymore. I love you, Wikipedia!] Plus, Bruce brings a little too much of USCHO humor to the mic with him. LOVE YOU BRUCE! That and Kerry Rodd was known for giving me a heart attack. You would have thought the 'Dogs scored on every shot they took.

RWD: Oh, believe me, I know. Kerry cracked me up. Also, I liked the radio then because Rik Jordan was always with him, and because they had postgame interviews and "fan in the stands." Another commentator you get along SO well with is Doug Woog. What is the story between you two?

DHG: Well, that dates back to my sophomore year. I ran a lap and he said "There goes Chubby again. He could use a few more of those goal laps." So I saw him in between periods and gave him [heck]. He offered to have me up in the booth for a segment to make me feel better. We were winning 6-1 at the time and I replied "No, I would rather be down here watching us kick your [badonkadonk]." So we have had a fun back and forth thing now on PA and Dubay every year.

RWD: Excellent.

DHG: I suppose I better start answering thse a little quicker, my wife is on my [badonkadonk] right now.

RWD: Oh, sorry.

DHG: Women, can't live with them, pass the beer nuts. [Uhh, sure...]

RWD: Okay, who are your favorite players? All time and current?

DHG: Ahh, great question. Well my favorite personality is Bill Watson. I think that might have had something to do with his drunk [badonkadonk] in Boston at the INCH party leaving me 10 messages singing the beersong every [darn] time. My favorite players are Drew Otten and Junior Lessard. I loved watching Lessard, and Drew and I met the first day of school. We were assigned seats next to each other in Jazz Studies. Drew and I have become pretty good friends. He was a groomsman in my wedding this summer as I was in his last summer. [No need to ask the "Is there a Mrs. DHG?" question.]

RWD: Oh, so you were friends outside of hockey.

DHG: Yeah, we actually partied a few times, and then the first hockey game I saw a player named Otten. I had no idea he played hockey.

RWD: What about on the current team?

DHG: I would say my current favorites would be 1A) Mason Raymond for obvious reasons and B) Andrew Carroll. I am a fan of blue collar hockey. I also love when Stalock comes out of the net and people are yelling at him to get back in the net. That is great.

RWD: I heard Mason Raymond has 2 speeds: walk and kill.

DHG: Yeah, I also heard that this is Mason Raymond's world and we are all just living in it. Hail Mason Raymond, king of all that is good.

RWD: So what's this team gotta do to get us some wins this year?

DHG: Start scoring some goals and get confidence. As bad as the D has played, we still aren't giving up a ton of goals. They just need to start putting the puck in the net. Some want to blame the coach. He is somewhat to blame, but it isn't like these guys aren't getting chances. They just are missing when the chances are there.

RWD: [About this weekend's road trip:] What's so great about the Keg 'n' Cork?

DHG: I guess it is the only bar we have found in Bemidji.

RWD: zing!

DHG: They have a drink called Combats as well. It has about 8 shots in it and they top if off with beer. It will MESS you up.

RWD: Holy Mother.

DHG: Yep. And the bartender was a racked out boombalatie

RWD: Let's say a fan wanted to buy you a drink. What are you asking for?

DHG: Windsor Diet, light on the diet, I am diabetic... Ok, I am not diabetic, plus diet coke has no sugar, I just want more booze.

RWD: Do you drink differently pregame? Or after a win vs. after a loss? I mean, different drinks, not volume consumed.

DHG: Not really. That is our motto, win or lose we booze. I drink whatever is going that night. Sometimes it is beer, other times it is booze, and usually jag bombs.

RWD: [The Crazy Canuck] said something about the Three Wise Men?

DHG: Gross.

RWD: He said you guys drink them! The liar!

DHG: What a [illegitimate child], he told the bartender to by us a tough shot, so he ordered them. Yes, we drank them, because he bought them, not out of wanting to.

RWD: Ohh. I would pass on the tequila. I guess he's trying to teach us to drink like Canadians. But I guess being a Canadian is motivation to drink more.

Well, there you have it, the DHG interview. That's all for now, folks. Cheer loud on Friday, because I'll be working long after the game ends. Bleccch.

Focusing On The Positives

...because that's what we do here. We're here to help, not hinder.

I can't say enough about Bryan McGregor. I am love, love, loving him this year. If he kept it up and had a monster Junior Lessard year, I wouldn't be opposed in the least. (We had a moment of reflection at my table at Senser's last night, as we all loved Junior. Who doesn't love Junior?) It seemed like McGregor was on the ice about 57 of the 65 minutes of the game, and he was crashing the net about half that time. My new friend, a Sioux fan who happens to be dating a prominent member of the media and a huge Gopher fan (a match made in heaven, no doubt), was very excited about Bryan as well. "Number 42! That's the guy who was denied last night!" she yelled. (On the shorthanded goal/too many men penalty ghetto debacle, she meant. Since he scored later, of course.) So, clearly, everyone is noticing Mr. McGregor.

So we lost. Got swept. Whatevs. We played hard, we didn't get embarrassed. No blow-outs. I don't know how much of the Gopher fan talk was just homer b.s. and how much was what they really believed, but they seemed to think the 'Dogs should just forfeit because we would be lucky to score, lucky to get away 10-0, etc. etc. Well, what really happened is, they were lucky to win. The 'Dogs could have just as easily won, if not for a few pipes, some horse-[feces] officiating, and a Gopher captain willing to win at any cost, if you know what I'm saying.

So, moving right along...

Numbers
Points Until We Surpass Last Year's Total: 23
Wins Until We Surpass Last Year's Total: 10

My "Guys" Competition:
Matt Niskanen: 10
Michael Gergen: 4
Jason Garrison: 2
Matt McKnight: 2
Mike Curry: 0 (Tech is up next, so you know what that means... Mike's gonna bring his guns to town.)

Freshmen Competition:
Fulton: 6
Akins: 1
Stalock: 1
others: 0