04 February 2009

RWD's Know Your Foes

A comprehensive look at RWD's opponents











DGGoddard













Puck Swami











CO14ers
site: thankfully, none
vs.















A Scary Person
(escaped mental patient)
site: duh (Eee! A circular reference!)

I know. It hardly seems like a fair fight. The Little Blogger That Could pitted against three grown men, one of whom possesses mystical powers. But there's very little I wouldn't do for my 'Dogs or for 'Dogs fans, so I'll get the best of them or die trying.

About the Enemy
Let's Go DU sprang onto the scene with the 2005-2006 campaign (a full year after the genesis of RWD) as the result of a manifesto on school spirit given by Goddard and some other hack. The report is mostly corpie-speak, which is an essential language for communication within the WCHA as it is the main language spoken at both Mariucci and Magness Arenas. Curiously, the report speaks of DU athletics as a "primary bonding opportunity," which seems like something that should be downplayed, given the overall negative results of rival Colorado College's bonding efforts, which resulted in multiple cases of mono and numerous suspensions. The remainder of the blog is far from corporate: its main purposes seem to be link-whoring to Mike Chambers's blog and other "legitimate" media sources, baiting North Dakota fans, and otherwise disseminating all the college hockey news that's fit to line your birdcage. DGGoddard is the main proprietor of LGDU with both CO14ers and Puck Swami as consultants.

Earlier this season, Puck Swami launched Know Your Foe as a counterpoint to the sometimes-dicey-on-the-facts LGDU; KYF seems to be culled solely from Wikipedia, school's media guides, and Puck Swami's vast knowledge of WCHA history. KYF seems doomed by its potential for stagnation, as many of DU's opponents are the same year after year and there are only 58 teams in college hockey, which leaves little in the way of new content. The Swami is a business legend, and one can only hope he has plans to diversify his content in order to keep it fresh and relevant. Puck Swami is an enigmatic creature, ageless, faceless and shapeless; whether he exists in this realm at all is a topic of heated debate.

CO14ers has not, as of presstime, started a blog on DU athletics or any other topic of interest (or noninterest) to any sector of the population. He travels the country with his bald ward as an ambassador of sorts, or what would pass for an ambassador if any entity would claim him publicly as their own, visiting hockey arenas and gentlemen's clubs from Anchorage to Zminneapolis.

Mascot and Colors
LGDU is at the heart of the Denver Boone Controversy. Boone is a fat, white, jolly, furry cap-wearing cartoon and the former mascot of the University of Denver. Boone was usurped by University brass with the explanation that he does not represent the diverse student body of DU. Maybe so, but fat white Imperialist guys seem to be the majority of DU alumni.

DU's school colors are extremely similar to UMD's colors. I drunkenly screamed this at politely and soberly pointed this out to CO14ers the first time we met. Or rather, the first time I remember meeting him.

Famous Readers
Let's Go DU is probably the secondmost widely-read non-newspaper affiliated blog in college hockey, with only Western College Hockey surpassing its readership. Naturally, with that kind of exposure, some real luminaries visit the site, including:
George Gwozdecky, DU Head Coach
Matt Carle, DU alumnus, Hobey Baker winner, defenceman for the Philadelphia Flyers
Dirty, USCHO posting lifetime achievement award winner and author of Dirty's Diatribe
Dave Hakstol, UND Head Coach and LGDU favorite
Mike Chambers, Denver Post beat writer
Bruce Ciskie, AOL FanHouse and College Hockey News contributor
Donna Carpenter, genius and beauty queen
Zach Blom, two-time All-WCHA Hottie Team honoree


The Series
The Pioneers are smarting from their overtime loss in Anchorage on Saturday, where they earned a split, which is one more point than tUMD got out of Anchorage. tDogs had a low-scoring and epileptic-fit-inducing weekend against Wisconsin where they scored 2 goals and earned 2 points. The last time these teams met, DU routed tUMD 5-1 on Friday night, which also gave fans their first installment of PEANUT BUTTER HJELLE TIME!!!!, and tUMD lost a close one on Saturday night, 2-1 (My recap for that game was almost non-existent and not worth the linky). Michael Gergen was the only Bulldog to score a goal that weekend. For DU, expect to see Marc Cheverie between the pipes for DU until tUMD's offensive onslaught chases him from the game, when we will see Little Peter Rohn's neighbor in Norway, Lars Paulgaard. For the Good Guys, WCHA co-defensive player of the week Alex Stalock will have the start, and I have a 99.999999% confidence level in that answer. DU's leading scorers are Anthony Maiani (really?) and diving legend Rhett Rakhshani at forward followed by Patrick Wiercioch on defence. DU's leading scorer would most likely be Tyler Bozak if he was not injured. UMD's scoring is led by Arthur Fonzarelli and MacGregor Sharp at forward, while captain Josh Meyers leads the defencemen in scoring. DU's Joe Colborne and UMD's Mike Connolly were teammates and linemates for the Camrose Kodiaks, so tUMD fans are hoping that MCON gives away all of Joe's secrets, while Joe forgets to do the same for Mike. tUMD arena staff will likely be augmented, with checkpoints set up to assist Coach Gwozdecky in finding the locker room, since he had so much trouble in North Dakota.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Glad to see you've been paying attention.

You forgot to mention DU SWEEPS. :-)

Dirty said...

This is the greatest blog entry in the history of mankind. I hope Furious George gets tossed from the game again this weekend and in anger break dances on the Bulldog at center ice.

Anonymous said...

Haven't you heard about CO14er's awesome web site? Check out http://www.letsgodu.com for some truly insightful content.

Anonymous said...

I'll give you some credit since you're not at MSU (let's be honest, it's a pretty crappy school).

However, Duluth isn't much better nor does it have much firepower to lead a charge into the Frozen Four. Maybe try following Minnesota instead. Hey, we all have to grow up someday...

Anonymous said...

Every word is true. You have captured the very essence of Pioneer Nation

God Bless RWD.

DC said...

I think there is some confusion here, anonymous #2. I am not a UMD student nor alumna.

And I do follow Minnesota, though they are a professional team and are therefore not eligible for the Frozen Four. And their offensive output is somewhat limited at times, but they have a great goalie in Backstrom.

du78 said...

Great job, watch out for 14ers and his possee this weekend.