Silent Spring

Huh, how about that? Nearly a month has gone by since our lives were made complete.

Let's wrap up a few things.

First, College Hockey Armageddon appears to have passed us by. Scary Princeton Coach is going to go to Nouveau Riche University instead of our coach, who somehow still does not have a contract. Dear Bob, get it done or I am not sending you ANY MONIES. Michigan Tech has a new coach, too. Some Michigan person. Clearly he's trading up by going to the WCHA.

RWD awards for the season:

My Guy of the year is Jack Connolly, for the second year in a row.

Freshman of the year is JT Brown, though Justin Faulk was breathing down his neck.

Jacky is also the Connolly Champion, though with Mike gone he will not be able to defend his title.

Drew Olson wins the penalty title over Dan DeLisle, which was uninteresting as neither took a boatload of penalties.

Seniors Trent Palm, Kyle Schmidt, Mike Montgomery, Chad Huttel and Justin Fontaine leave us. Thank you for your fierce and unwavering commitment to the program, for making it better than when you arrived, and for giving us your very best no matter what was asked of you. Palm played on one leg. Schmidt had hand surgery days before scoring the game winning goal against Michigan. Montgomery and Fontaine gave up pro opportunities to return to school. Huttel stuck with the program despite limited playing time.

Thanks to your families as well; all five of you have families who were vocal and visible in their support for you and for the program. I didn't go to a single road game without seeing at least one Palm, Schmidt, Montgomery, Huttel or Fontaine in the crowd. Sometimes even wearing a gorilla suit or a blonde wig, making candy for fellow fans, or buying beers for rowdy road-trippers.

I'm contemplating a site re-design but haven't seen anything I liked yet. Don't worry, it won't become busy or overloaded with ads or scripts that crash your browsers, it will still be as spartan as ever. At the very least I will be doing a new banner for the off-season.

Posting will be sporadic throughout the summer, as always. I might have some other stuff to say about the season, and of course there's the All-Hottie team, and I'm trying to get tickets to the draft. I'll tweet if I update and try to keep you informed of any exciting and fun news going on in the world of Bulldog hockey.

Thanks again for reading, for your comments and your emails and tweets. Thank you for the sense of community you all provide, as Bulldog fans or as hockey fans in general. In the seven seasons I've been writing this site, I've never once wanted to shut the site down; it is always fun and the connections I've made as a result of writing are priceless. What you folks say makes me laugh, makes me think and humbles me. Victories are sweeter and losses are easier to bear when we celebrate and suffer together.

A Dish Best Served Cold

tUMD 4, SCCC 2
tUMD 3, SCCC 2 (3OT)

On 11 March, 2007, freshman defenceman Trent Palm was on the bench when Andreas Nodl ended tUMD's season at 11:33 of the 3rd overtime. Senior Josh Johnson made 62 saves in his last game as a Bulldog. There wasn't a single Bulldog player, staffer or fan who wasn't absolutely devastated by that loss.

And last night, two freshmen defencemen for St. Cloud were in the locker room getting IVs to rehydrate, one after cramping up on ice and crawling off after being trapped out there while tUMD maintained possession of the puck. Mike Lee made 60 saves before Mike Connolly finally got the puck past him and ended SCSU's season. I doubt there were any Husky players, staffers or fans who were not absolutely devastated.

We know how you feel. Really, we do.

And now we know what it's like to feel the ecstatic relief of a triple-overtime win. Since the student section numbers were down, I decided I'd stand with them and make some noise. I was missing my nice, padded, comfy chair in 216 after awhile, but those nice long bleachers are perfect for lying on for a quick rest at intermission. Oh yes, there were five intermissions. Five. They had the Duluth East - Eden Prairie game on between periods, which caused me even more stress, and then when East lost I was terrified the Bulldogs were going to suffer the same letdown.

The Bulldog defence wasn't going to let that happen. Mike Connolly put the puck in the net, but the defence won the game. St. Cloud's only goals came from a power play and a scrum around the net. Drew Olson somehow stopped a breakaway, coming out of nowhere. Everyone was getting bodies on players, sticks in passing lanes, and pucks off stickblades. Kenny made a third fewer saves than Mike Lee (who was outstanding) thanks to the defence. And the forwards were in on it, too, laying hits or stepping back if a defender jumped up into the play. Mike Seidel was a human wrecking ball. And Kenny stood his ground, like Gandalf with the Balroc.

Northland News Center video that includes the game-winner, which I did not even see because it was so far away and I didn't have the presence of mind to look at the video board because I was mobbing Biddco and friends.


Northland News Center video of the postgame comments by Mike Montgomery and Mike Connolly.


I am so happy. After the Hermantown loss, the East loss, and the UMD women's loss, it just felt like nothing could go right. I was so nervous it was hard to participate in chants. We were hungry, thirsty, people were sobering up... I mean, we're talking real tragedies here. Anyway, I am so VERY glad I'm not getting in my car at this moment to drive back to the Cities from Duluth after a game right now, and thanks to THE ENTIRE BULLDOG TEAM, I didn't have to!

And I'm sure Palm is beyond thrilled to be on the right end of overtime this time around.

All-WCHA Ballot

It's that time of year again! The All-Conference ballots are being released. Might as well release mine.

First Team
F: Jack Connolly
F: Mike Connolly
F: Justin Fontaine
D: Justin Faulk
D: Mike Montgomery
G: Kenny Reiter

Second Team
F: Travis Oleksuk
F: JT Brown
F: Kyle Schmidt
D: Brady Lamb
D: Drew Olson
G: Aaron Crandall

Third Team
F: Mike Seidel
F: David Grun
F: Dan DeLisle
D: Wade Bergman
D: Trent Palm
G: Christian Gaffy

Rookies
F: JT Brown
F: Max Tardy
F: Joe Basaraba
D: Justin Faulk
D: Luke McManus
G: Christian Gaffy

Coach of the Year: Scott Sandelin
Player of the Year: Mike Connolly
Rookie of the Year: Justin Faulk

Band of Bulldogs

This day is call'd the feast of Sandelin.
He that outlives this day, and comes safe home,
Will stand a tip-toe when this day is nam'd,
And rouse him at the name of Sandelin.
He that shall live this day, and see old age,
Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours,
And say 'To-morrow is Saint Sandelin.'
Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars,
And say 'These wounds I had on Sandelin's day.'
Old men forget; yet all shall be forgot,
But he'll remember, with advantages,
What feats he did that day. Then shall our names,
Familiar in his mouth as household words-
Justin Fontaine, Mike Montgomery,
Trent Palm and Kyle Schmidt, and Chad Huttel-
Be in their flowing cups freshly rememb'red.
This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Saint Sandelin shall ne'er go by,
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remembered-
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition;
And gentlemen in Duluth now-a-bed
Shall think themselves accurs'd they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Sandelin's day.

-William Shakespeare, Henry V, Act 4 Scene III

Thanks, seniors. All five of you, in your ways, have gone above and beyond for the team, and that is more than appreciated.

It Was A Very Good Year

Yesterday I was talking to Dirty about when I was in high school and I employed guerilla warfare tactics to try to get a certain guy to go out with me. (I'm still not sure if I was actually successful or not. We are friends and I think he reads this site occasionally, or at least keeps saying he means to, which is probably just a lie. It would really be my luck if this was the first time he surfed on in. Dirty assured me that guys are stupid so I'm going to assume he probably wouldn't recognize I'm talking about him anyway.) All of a sudden it dawned on me that my stalkerazzi salad days were ten years ago! TEN YEARS!!! What?1?!?!?!? I’m old! It’s horrifying.

The point of this story is not to appear even more scary and aggressive than usual, but rather to segue into discussing the weekend. Tomorrow night tUMD takes on the US NTDP U-18 Team. (They should have a mascot or something. Like the USA Bald Eagles or the USA Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragons.) These kids are freaking young. They were born in 1993! That just made me pull more gray hairs from my head and ears! Frightening. Let’s get some perspective.

Jurassic Park came out and grossed $915 million. Schindler’s List won best Picture and Sookie from that vampire show won her Best Supporting Actress Oscar for The Piano. I was horribly jealous because she and I are the same age and she was in a movie and I was in a summer school theatre production of Aladdin.

River Phoenix overdosed outside the Viper Room. Frank Zappa died. No one cares about this except AJ, but Mayhem guitarist Euronymous was stabbed to death by fellow band member Varg Vikernes. Some people were born, but I’ve never heard of any of them because I don’t watch the Disney Channel or Nickelodeon.

Tragically, the band Korn was formed. Fortunately, so were the Backstreet Boys! (Who I recently learned are back together.) Arrested Development won best New Artist at the Grammys. Arrested Development! "Mr. Wendal!"

The #1 song on the Billboard Top 100 was "I Will Always Love You." A much better song, "Whoomp! (There It Is)" was #2.

The other 98 were songs I skated along to at the Roller Gardens.

Saved by the Bell The New Class and Saved By the Bell the College Years debuted, as did Mighty Morphin Power Rangers AND Walker: Texas Ranger. The Wonder Years and Cheers ended.

Czechoslovakia separated into the Czech Republic and Slovakia, Bill Clinton was sworn in as President and Boris Yeltsin was elected. The Brady Bill was signed into law. The Branch Davidians in Waco offed themselves. The World Trade Center was bombed.

Kirby Puckett was the All-Star MVP. That pitcher with no hand threw a no hitter. Jim McMahon, Cris and Anthony Carter, Mike Tice, Randall McDaniel and Fuad Reveiz played for Denny Green and the Vikings. Basketball occurred, I assume.

Guy Carbonneau et les Habitants (avec G.M. Jacques Lemaire) ont gagne le Stanley Cup sur les LA Kings et Wayne Gretzky. Alexandre Daigle was the #1 draft pick, by the Ottawa Senators (#2 was Chris Pronger. Hm...) The North Stars left Minnesota.

Paul Kariya won the Hobey Baker and Maine beat a Jeff Jackson-coached LSSU in the national championship game in Milwaukee. Derek Plante was still playing for the MacNaughton-winning Bulldogs. Bruce Ciskie was on the chess team at Superior High School. Mike Montgomery and Kenny Reiter were in first grade. Christian Gaffy, Justin Faulk and Joe Basaraba were in diapers.

Anyone else feeling a little bit older now?

I Hope You Had The Time Of Your Life

tUMD 2, Unlucky Stiffs 1

I'm so tired I can barely think.

I woke up this morning terrified tUMD would lose tonight's game. I've never been so nervous in my life for a non-playoff game. The 'Dogs opened the DECC with an 8-1 win over UMTC, and there was nothing I wanted more than to see them close it down with a win.

Oh, and a jersey. Right.

I went out to brunch with Biddco and the Aaaahj at Pizza Luce, and then my dad, Biddco and I went to the football game, where we met up with DHG and tPB Dude. Wrapped in layers of blankets and clothing, we watched the Bulldog football team beat Augustana 24-13. It was an exciting football game and it took my mind off the hockey game for a little while.

After the game, the waiting started to get to me. I was so nervous, in fact, that I couldn't even stay at Green Mill past 5:50. Biddco and I headed over since he wanted to get a good seat in the student section. I noted there were no other bids on the jersey I wanted and then hung out with Ma Ciskie and Li'l Ciskie and watched the DECC fill up.

The team was about to come out when the Zamboni came out onto the ice. Slowly, it opened, and out came the Loon! People were on their feet and cheering. It simply would not have been right if the Loon had not been there to close down the DECC.

The game started strangely, as I think there was supposed to be a ceremonial puck drop with Huffer, and there was not. I can't imagine what could have occurred to prevent it from happening but finally the refs just dropped the puck and the game began.

The Bulldogs were absolutely dominant for at least 40 minutes of the game. If not for Sam Brittain and the pipes, the game would have been a blowout. tUMD didn't get anything into the back of the net until Justin Faulk got a power play goal and I did my first and only goal lap around the DECC. Some of it alone, because I was too slow for Kleiner, DHG and Boody, and the students caught up with me, but I kept going once we got to the student section. Oh well. I didn't want to trip and go flying, or pass out from lack of oxygen.

In the second period, Montgomery was called for interference with 2:38 to go and I had to go down to protect my bid. I missed seeing MCON's goal but I certainly celebrated. I saw a replay of it later. Incredible goal. Just sick. I don't know if Mike Connolly has ever had a garbage goal in his life; his goals are all so lovely.

The jersey auctions are always insane. This year's was no exception. There was lots of posturing and covert observing and flat out panic (ok, that was just me.) I aggressively bid myself into owning Dylan Olsen's jersey. My dad won Trent Palm's, and the Aaaahj was boxed out at the last minute for Max Tardy's by some guy who sandbagged writing down his bid. Argh. I finally felt some of the stress melt away as I realized the jersey was mine.

In the third period, Nick Shore did his best to try to murder Kyle Schmidt, and was asked to leave the game. Let it be known that tUMD had more power play opportunities and fewer overall penalties than DU. We can put to bed any rumors from other teams' fans that the WCHA league officials are biased in favor of DU. (NCAA DII football officials may be biased in favor of Augustana, though.) tUMD did not score on the 5-minute power play although they had some excellent chances, including one that went for review. JT Brown took a slashing penalty and DU scored at the 8:25 mark, making the game too close for comfort once more.

DU put really their only sustained pressure on somewhere around maybe 8 minutes to go? I'm not sure. They had multiple chances and Kenny Reiter played the way we've known he can play all along. He was up to the task, and so were the rest of the Dogs. DU managed to pull their goalie with 1:48 to go, and the Dogs played probably the best final two minutes of a hockey game they have all year. MCON missed a chance for an empty net goal, but instead of trying for a bad shot with a DU player in his way, and a possible turnover, he tied up the puck for precious ticks off the clock. The 'Dogs kept Denver from getting anything decent going with the extra attacker on, and they gained possession with just a few seconds left and that was the game. Incredible. A gutsy way to go ungently into that good night.

After the game, the 'Dogs had a stick salute for the fans before the handshake, and then once DU left the ice, they invited all the alumni present to come down for a final stick salute. After some words from Huffer and the lowering of the "Final Year" banner, Hoagy led over 100 Bulldogs, past and present, in another final stick salute. Audio clips were played of a few milestone tUMD games, and I only wish there had been more. Finally, the players left the ice, and one final audio clip had Marsh Nelson wishing us goodnight.

What a way to go. I cried, I'm not ashamed to admit it. The DECC means a lot to a lot of people. I heard people who had sat next to each other for years saying goodbye to each other. I saw couples who met in college taking pictures with their children in the seats they used to sit in. People lingered, taking pictures, talking, in disbelief that they'll be sitting in a new arena next time the Dogs play in Duluth. The arena was a dump, but it was ours, and it held a lot of memories. And it was built at a time when most arenas were dumps, anyway.

Finally we tore ourselves away from the arena and went to claim our jerseys. I was standing around talking with other successful jersey winners and then the players snuck in. Dylan was one of the first ones in and he came over and was very friendly. I managed to rein in my extreme awkwardness and had a real conversation with him. I asked if he was excited for next weekend and the WJC tryouts and he said yeah. I told him I'd cheer for him, but not for Canada, and asked him if he would light up Justin Faulk if they played against each other. He was noncommittal. I think that means yes. I asked if his dad was there and he said no, but he wished he was. As you all know, Dylan's dad Darryl played for NMU and certainly had some games at the DECC. I also told him I'd converted some Blackhawks fans to UMD fans because of him, and told him I looked forward to watching him play in the NHL and the rest of this year... and maybe next year. He sort of smiled and I said I knew it might not happen and I just wanted him to make the right choice for himself. We got a photo together which is sort of crappy as the Aaaahj was trying to turn on the flash and failed, and then I forgot to ask him to sign my jersey. I'll have to be a creepy stalker after a game sometime and get him to sign it then.

I've spent an hour writing this post and I could probably wax rhapsodic about the DECC for another hour, but for now, I'll just wish you all goodnight.

Shiver Me Timbers!

Holy hell, I just got back from my seat selection, and before we get to that, we must discuss just how rotten the weather was. It rained the whole drive up (and morons were driving without their lights on! Huzzah!) and on the way back it snowed, then rained, all while gale force winds practically blew me off the road. This ranks up there with my Worst Hockey Drives Ever. Other worst drives include:

Driving back from Houghton with MEg monstrously hungover on an hour of sleep
Driving up to Duluth with FHG and Kleiner and hitting unexpected swirling snow and annoying traffic
Driving home from Duluth with MEg in a whiteout

Anyway, I picked my seats today. I waited for probably 20 minutes for my turn in this little lobby right by the Champions Club thingy. It was kind of lonely because everyone else there seemed super grouchy. One guy was really mad about how low he was on the priority list. Sir, perhaps this was something that could have been remedied months ago when you got your selection date, when it wasn't necessary to invent a time machine in order for you to be made whole. I bet your head would have exploded if I had mentioned this was my second year as a season ticket holder and we were picking at the same time! Great Scott!!! 1.21 Jigowatts!!!

I had my first and only foray into the Champions Club to get a hard hat, and then a person named Butch was assigned as my personal guide. He asked if there was anywhere specific I wanted to go, like the ends or the sides. I said "Between the ends and the sides?" Because I am an idiot. I showed him more specifically where I wanted and away we went. I got seats pretty much where I wanted (Section 216, Row 8, Seats 20 and 21) and I hope Biddco can pick right next to me on Thursday. Sorry to everyone who is in my vicinity.

Here is a view from my seats:




























You can totally imagine this as a game. Look, that large blue crane thing is Dan DeLisle. And then those two things right on the point are like Montgomery and Olsen, and then the cones are the opponents.

Ciskie roped me into coming down to some sort of radio promotion thing, and then ambushed me by trying to force me to discuss the Vikings AND did not allow me to use my alias, Penelope von Streuselbottom. I refused, so then he got me to talk about the new arena and I said I took the last two good seats, which was not what I was supposed to say. I am sorry, I did not get the script in advance. If you were listening, I am also sorry. I hope you were not, because it is 45 seconds of your life that I have ruined, in addition to any time you spent on RWD.

Lots of stuff coming this week!! So, more time to waste on here!

The Hangover

2004-2005 was the most depressing Bulldog season in this Modern Era. (Meaning since RWD was invented.) It is worse than the vast wasteland that was 2005-2008. We knew those would be dark times, but the 04-05 team had everything and gave us nothing.

An esteemed reader of RWD (all readers of RWD are esteemed) fears that this season might turn out that way. Certainly the 03-04 season was filled with more successes and that team was more dominant in the league. But the expectations are high this year, and expectations are a heavy, heavy burden.

I think it's a legit concern, but I also think that all is going to be well. (Unlike les Vikings.) And now I shall list my reasons!

1. The Bulldogs are led by three players who have had to bust their butts.
Mike Montgomery was a walk-on who played 9 games at forward his freshman year, and is now a captain and top defenceman who we nearly lost to the pros. Jack Connolly and Mike Connolly are ridiculously talented but have to continuously prove themselves because of their size.

2. There are lots of guys hungry for playing time.
There are 10 defencemen. 6 can play each night. There are 14 forwards. 12 can play each night. Better come to play every day, boys.

3. No reports about anyone coming back to school weighing 800 lbs or smoking pot or whatever.
One person is injured, yes, but other than that, it sounds like everyone's in good shape. Of course, it could be on the double secret down low.

4. The freshmen coming in are excellent.
The freshmen in '04-'05 were sort of exciting. THESE freshmen are blowing my mind. (Not as much as '05-'06 freshmen, but still, awesome.)

5. The new arena is going to invigorate the team mid-season.
EVERYONE is pumped for this new arena. The team, the school, the fans, me. Especially me. It means more sell-outs, more excitement and buzz in the community, and I hope they can ride the wave of invigoration through the grueling second half. (Wave of invigoration? Meh. I'm leaving it in.)

Picture Perfect

Blah almost forgot to post.

Last night I had a dream about AMSoil Arena! But not a good one! I had seats in the front row of the balcony, but 1. they were really up high 2. every time I cheered I almost slipped through the railing and 3. the seats were really bad as they were looking down on the rink through a large square hole, so some action was obscured. Also no one was there, no one was cheering, and tUMD was playing like crap. Argh.

Anyway, tUMD's roster pics are out, and guys, you have outdone yourselves. Best collective roster pics of ANY tUMD team since I have been judging appearances. No one looks crazy! People who had bad hair have better hair now! If only Jacky had grown his hair out again, then everything would be perfect. (And DON'T THINK I DIDN'T NOTICE guys wearing the same suit... seniors, come on.) Bergman wins best dressed. Kenny Reiter and J.T. Brown were unable to keep a straight face. Wonder what was going on in the background, hm?

And... holy crap. Montgomery cut his hair.

Study Break

tUMD 2, Imperialist Oppressors 3

All right all right all right. Putting down my World Domination textbook to write this, even though game time is in 2 hours (edit: now 1 hour, as it took me a long time to write this) and I could totally just cheat and do one of my "weekend wraps" where I cover both games in one post. I'm hoping for a much better outcome.

I drove up to Duluth with my dad in one of those whirlwind up-and-back the same night trips. Fortunately I was in my seat BEFORE puck drop and introductions. Well, not really in MY seat. One of the benefits of having seats at the very top of my section is that no one wants to sit there. We ended up having a row to ourselves, or as I called it, a luxury row. So we moved into the middle and then we stood the whole game. I couldn't help it, I was very anxious and could not stand still.
The first period was very uneventful. tUMD had a power play chance early, which seems to happen a lot, and they did not capitalize, which also happens a lot. It wasn't that early, I guess, it was about 6 mins into the game, but I feel like those early PPs are such a missed opportunity. They're well-rested, the other team hasn't had a chance to get adjusted to their style, the goalie's not quite settled yet. Of course, 5 on 3 opportunities to tie up the game when the opponents are tired are also good chances to score. Or so it would seem.

DU got on the board in the second period thanks to junior forward Jesse Martin, who pretty much came out of nowhere for me this year. I'd never heard of him before! I think it's maybe because he has a boring name. I mean, it's easy to remember someone named Rhett Rakhshani. Well, also because he is very good. And extremely unattractive. But Jesse Martin seems about as plain vanilla as you can get and thus his emergence this year has surprised me. That goal was assisted on by one half of DU's power couple, William Wrenn (a LOT of people fell for that!!) and Anthony Maiainollyollyoxandfreeani. The DECC was as close to dead silent as 4437 (ha! Yeah right! That many people did not show up!) could be. I do not believe there was a single DU fan in the house.

I yelled at the Dogs that I didn't want to see any of that two goal lead crap, and caused this old man in front of me to visibly jump. Drew Akins scored on the Bulldogs' second power play opportunity. It was actually a power play I thought was going nowhere in a hurry, but they pumped it in with 22 seconds remaining. I didn't see what happened because there were a lot of folks in the way and it was at the other end of the rink from me.

I'd like to pause here for a public service announcement. Dear Bulldogs: when you go through your little celebratory fist pump line, it's supposed to go Goal Scorer, First Assist, Second Assist, Losers Who Didn't Get A Point. Not whoever gets there first.

Joe Colborne scored on a PP chance where he was literally a foot in front of Peanut Butter Hjelle and he roofed it. The puck went almost straight up. Guys. No need to let them in so close. That's classic Denver right there, and classic Colborne: right in front of the net, just hangin' around waiting for the puck. He's not untouchable, just give him a nice friendly hip check. He's tall, yes, but he's not very solid.

DU got that all-important 2 goal lead on a Kyle Ostrow PP goal, but tUMD answered fairly quickly with a neat goal. I can't really describe it because I'm just not good at that sort of thing, but Monkey was carrying the puck into the zone (IMAGINE THAT, IT ONLY TOOK TWO PERIODS OF HOCKEY TO FIGURE THAT OUT) and just plowed right through these DU guys and maintained possession of the puck and then something happened that I don't remember, either he shot the puck or passed it or lost it and MCON recovered it, but it was in the net! With half a period to go! Yes!

With about 7:25 to go in the game, DU took a penalty (a vicious elbow to the head that knocked a helmet off, which could easily have been a five minute major) and then another one, and then Chevy made this amazing save and then the wheels fell off the power play unit and flames blasted from my ears and nostrils.

It kind of looked like this, except without the beard, and replace DEFENSE with OFFENSE.













Once tUMD had the goalie pulled, things went crazy. Cheverie is a good goalie. There's no doubt about it. He made some great saves, and we needed to be perfect, but everything was just a little off, a little to the left or a little early or a little late or a little too far, and then the game was over. There was a sort of horsecrap call at the very end when DU had an obvious hand pass that was not blown dead, and then they iced the puck, and then there were only two seconds in the game instead of 10. Which is not THAT big of a deal but still, 10 seconds is time for a face-off win, a quick shot, and a rebound, and two seconds is not.

Oh well. Win tonight. DU will be without their star defenceman, Patrick Wiercioch, and we will be without Dylan Olsen, who did not have his best game last night. Best of luck to BOTH of them at the World Juniors camp, and I hope they represent college hockey well!

I don't know who's going to be in goal, but I do know Delisle Smash! is in for Hendo.

Numbers
Wins until we reach last season's total: 3 (Let's make that 2 tonight!)
Points until we reach last season's total: 12 (And bring that down to 10!)

My Guys
Jack Connolly: 23
Brady Lamb: 8
Mike Seidel: 7

Freshmen
Dylan Olsen: 9
Mike Seidel: 7
Keegan Flaherty: 2
Wade Bergman: 1
Dan Delisle: 1
Jake Hendrickson: 1
Drew Olson: 1

Connollys
Jacky: 23
Mikey: 16! (Only exclamation point in The Numbers, sadly)

Olsen/Olson
Drew: 1
Dylan: 9

Drews
Olson: 10
Akins: 15

On Notice
Cody Danberg
Dan Delisle
Keegan Flaherty
Chad Huttel
Scott Kishel
Brady Lamb
Drew Olson

Goals Only
Rob Bordson
Jordan Fulton
Dylan Olsen
Mike Seidel

El Capitan

UMD announced today that Drew Akins will be the 2009-2010 captain, with alternate captains Mike Montgomery and Jordan Fulton.

SO excited for Drew! As you all know (because you follow religiously every word I write), back in June I got the odds, straight from Vegas, on UMD's captaincy.

Drew Akins - 1:1
Drew's pretty a shoo-in for some sort of leadership role, and I'm pretty sure it would be the C. Drew stands up for his teammates, which sometimes gets him in a little bit of trouble, but at least he doesn't have rage blackouts like Zach Jones or attack mascots like Joe Finley; he regains control easily. He's won the heart of MeanEgirl, and a whole slew of creeps at USCHO can attest that is no easy task.

Jordan Fulton - 18:1
Jordy's a senior, which certainly gives him an advantage, but I'm not sure. Rumors swirling that he might bolt for Calgary early have so far been incorrect, but they might affect the locker room's vote.

Mike Montgomery - 50:1
Monty crossed over from foward to defenceman seamlessly, showing he was willing to do what the team needed. If he continues to show the defensive prowess he had last season, he'll take on a leadership role as a senior. This year? I doubt it.

So, folks who bet on Monkey certainly cleaned up. And uh, I guess if you bet on Fonzie, sorry. Now pay up or I will break your thumbs.

Congratulations to all three. Work the guys hard during Captain's Practice, set the tone for the season and teach them what it means to be a Bulldog. You learned from some of the best we've ever seen.

And remember, guys, you don't have to wear a letter to lead. MacGregor Sharp says so.

O Captain! My Captain!

Over the years we have been together, my dear readers, I've been many things. Joker, smoker, midnight toker, and now bookie. That's right, I'm going to handicap the 2009-2010 UMD hockey captaincy for you. No, no need to thank me. I'm here to serve you.

(Other important news: my Jacky and Fuzzy may be drafted! Ee!)

Note: I'm not going to distinguish between captains and assistant captains. Too lazy. Plus, UMD has had tri-captains, one captain and two assistants, and co-captains with no assistants in the past three years.

Seniors
Drew Akins - 1:1
Drew's pretty a shoo-in for some sort of leadership role, and I'm pretty sure it would be the C. Drew stands up for his teammates, which sometimes gets him in a little bit of trouble, but at least he doesn't have rage blackouts like Zach Jones or attack mascots like Joe Finley; he regains control easily. He's won the heart of MeanEgirl, and a whole slew of creeps at USCHO can attest that is no easy task.

Jordan Fulton - 18:1
Jordy's a senior, which certainly give him an advantage, but I'm not sure. Rumors swirling that he might bolt for Calgary early have so far been incorrect, but they might affect the locker room's vote.

Trent Palm - 12:1
Palm's got more of a chance than Fulton as he is a defenceman, where the team isn't as deep. Palm could have red-shirted but gutted out the season as best he could, which I'm sure his teammates noticed. He's got a mean hip check, and I'm about 99% certain his brother dressed up as a gorilla at regionals.

Chase Ryan - 300:1
Well-liked by all of his teammates, not being on the ice and thus unable to fulfill many captain's duties makes the odds pretty long for Chase.

Juniors
Rob Bordson - 100:1
Bordo had some ups and downs this past season, so he'll probably need another year before his chances improve.

Cody Danberg - 30:1
Cody's a hard worker on the ice, and I think he's a bit of a dark horse candidate, though we may need to wait til next year for a chance to see a letter on his chest.

Justin Fontaine - 5:1
After rocketing to WCHA stardom as a sophomore, The Fonz may be ready to step up as a leader. After all, he can score like mad on the power play and can start a jukebox without a quarter.

Chad Huttel - 75:1
The Hutt will need to crack the lineup consistently before he can seriously contend for a letter. He's been known to stand up for his teammates before, so I'm sure he has it in him to lead. Show us what you're made of this year, Chad!

Mike Montgomery - 50:1
Monty crossed over from foward to defenceman seamlessly, showing he was willing to do what the team needed. If he continues to show the defensive prowess he had last season, he'll take on a leadership role as a senior. This year? I doubt it.

Kyle Schmidt - 30:1
Smitty so willingly sacrificed his face for the good of the team, and he is also a supergenius. I believe captains should be strong academically as well as athletically, to set a good example for their teammates.

Sophomores
Jack Connolly - 50:1
My Sweet Jacky is already captain of my heart, but I think the team will go to the upperclassmen ranks this year. Junior and senior year, his odds will improve greatly.

Mike Connolly - 45:1
Shocking, I know, that I'd give him better odds than MSJ, but I was asking someone else (someone who knows the guys better than I do, meaning AT ALL) who they thought would be captains and MCON's name was mentioned.

David Grun - 250:1
Without very many games under his belt, Grun's got to get more experience at the collegiate level before he can expect a C or an A.

Brady Hjelle - 200:1
Brady will be setting the tone in goal for us, letter or no letter. I doubt he'll even be a C or A even as a senior, but he'll certainly be a leader on the team.

Scott Kishel - 180:1
I'm pretty sure Scott will be anchoring a PP unit this year, but I don't see a formal leadership role for him just yet.

Brady Lamb - 100:1
The odds that Brady will be a captain or assistant for UMD someday? Probably about 2:1. But for now, he gets an edge over Kishel simply due to playing time last year, but he'll have to wait his turn.

Travis Oleksuk - 100:1
I think it would be great for Oleksuk to be a captain someday! He's a legacy, after all. Did you know his dad ranks 9th in the NCAA in career power play goals? I just learned that now. T.O. doesn't need to focus on a captaincy right now. He needs to focus on having a breakout sophomore season.

Kenny Reiter - 275:1
If Hjelle's odds aren't that good, and he's looking to be our starter, then Kenny's odds can't be much better. The goalies just need to do their thing and keep each other sharp.

Freshmen
Aggregate odds: 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000:1
I guess anything's possible; it's the whole premise of the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle. (Check it, there's even a sexy Fourier series!!)

The Way We Were

Yes, I know. It has been an unacceptably long time since I last posted, and unlike other season's finales, there's been a ridiculous amount of GOOD content about which to write. If you cared, I am sorry, but the end of the season gave me a lot to sift through and it deserved my full attention. Even now, though this post is more like a novel, I feel like I haven't done it justice, but it's a try.

I don't know of any Bulldog fan who on some level was not ready to pack it in after the UAA series. I mean, some were entirely ready to do so or had already, while some remained cautiously optimistic. I had a post kind of already plotted out in case something terrible happened, which I sort of remember now, weeks and eons later. It certainly felt as though we were headed for another futile, Fitzgerald-esque off-season. You know, "So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past." Another mediocre finish.

Instead, we got one of the wildest finishes to a season that could possibly be imagined in the drug-addled hallucinations of a schizophrenic.

It started in CC. I was actually rather pleased that we had drawn CC rather than any of the myriad other teams we could have played. Yes, we'd only played them once, but we'd played them at home and had totally rocked it. In fact, it was the only team we had fared well against away from home.

tUMD scored 7 goals in those two games and never trailed. It was incredible. They played in a commanding fashion and despite CC's best attempts to kill our players, the Bulldogs swept them into the off-season. Travis Oleksuk burst onto the college hockey scene, and Alex Stalock made an impossible-looking save, as he is wont to do.

God, was that ever a long time ago. Almost a month ago, to be exact. I was incredibly depressed that I couldn't go to the games in CC as I had to work.

The days before the Final Five seemed tortuously slow. On top of that, the crazy PWR-heads had crunched some rather terrifying numbers: there were multiple scenarios in which the Bulldogs would still miss the NCAA tournament. Funny how we'd gone from lookin' good to almost surely out to possibly back in it within a few weeks. Pretty indicative of the season as a whole.

The play-in game was probably the most terrifying game I'd attended, simply because I was almost entirely surrounded by Gopher fans. It ended up not being that bad though, as all the UND fans were cheering against the Gophers, which meant they were cheering for tUMD. I also saw a group of St. Cloud fans in their jerseys with print-outs of tUMD's logo pinned to the fronts. Dirty and MEg both donned UMD gear as well. I have never seen them look more attractive.

I don't believe in fate or destiny, but when I look back on that weekend, I have never seen anything go so right in my entire life. Certainly not for a team that I follow.

It started off well. Gopher goalie Alex Kangas had was fighting off the flu (whether it was influenza or the oft-mislabeled gastroenteritis, I don't know nor do I want to) and it was unclear if he would even play, but he's a gamer and so he was out there. Barely three minutes into the game, Kangas misplayed a rebound and MacGregor Sharp scored the first goal of the game. The UMD fans in attendance, as well as the Gopher haters, made the Xcel sound fairly loud. Five minutes later, UMD found themselves two men short for slightly over a minute, and I really started to stress. Penalty killing had not been a strength over the season, and though they had been must better in CC, they had given up a 6x4 goal and a 6x5 goal. tDogs managed to kill it off, and went into the locker room at intermission with a lead. The Gophers came out in the second with Patterson in net and Kangas on the bench, apparently too sick to continue. The second period saw the always hard-working Matt Greer put the Dogs up another goal, but despite the best efforts of my dear friend and our DanceMania antics, I could NOT calm down. In the third, the Gophers scored early on a weird deflection type goal, which would be the only goal to beat Stalock that weekend. Then I REALLY stressed. The clock could not POSSIBLY go any slower. Once time started running out, I kept one eye on the play and one eye on Patterson. tUMD managed to control play enough that the Gophers couldn't pull him until there were 38 seconds left, and still the Gophers nearly had a great scoring chance, if not for the brilliant hooking penalty Andrew Carroll took, which could not be assessed before time ran out.

The first task completed, tDogs now faced possibly a more daunting prospect: they absolutely needed to win one of the next two games in order to guarantee entry into the NCAAs, and they had to face a team on a roll: UND. Allegiances changed: UND fans were (of course) cheering against tUMD, while only the bitterest of Gopher fans stayed off the UMD bandwagon. I really stressed, again. This was overall a very stressful weekend for me!!! In addition to the games, I had three exams, and I actually skipped the Friday afternoon game to study. Or to attempt to study, as I was terribly distracted.

Stalock recently edged out UND goaltender Brad Eidsness for the WCHA goaltending title by an incredibly slim margin, so many touted it as a battle to see who really could claim the title. Eidsness decided he wanted to show he could beat Stalock at his own game, and while Fonzie was in the box serving a too many men on the ice penalty, Brad went behind the net to play the puck and made a blind pass to MacGregor Sharp, who quickly tucked the puck into the net before Eidsness could finish crapping himself. Mike Montgomery added another hard-working goal in the first period, and the Dogs had a nice lead at the end of the first. Of course, I was still stressed out, but you know me. In the second period, Brady Lamb was handed a major penalty for kneeing Matt Watkins. I went home and watched the game again on my DVR, and I will tell you folks, it was not a kneeing penalty. Watkins came off the bench and skated right into Brady Lamb, who is clearly going after the puck. He makes an odd leg motion, but if you look closely, he's trying to accelerate, not trying to take out Watkins, who as I already said, skated right into him. Watkins was injured, which was unfortunate, but not every injury in hockey is a penalty. UMD killed the major penalty in a textbook manner, and the only subsequent goal was an empty netter from Mike Connolly, who popped his jersey and made a bunch of people get their undies in a bunch. I have no problem with the jersey pop, as long as they're popping the front and not the back. I was so excited after the game I looked up at DHG in the club level and screamed "WE'RE GONNA DANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Saturday came. The day of reckoning. tUMD was essentially playing with the house's money at this point. I was taking a ridiculously hard test and then another test that was not as hard and then I made it over to see the rest of the UW/DU game. And of course, despite everyone's logical arguments and soothing platitudes, I was stressed out. I was probably not helping myself because between periods at each game, the only other person in the building more stressed out than I came over and we probably ended up stressing ourselves out MORE. Although it is nice to have someone who understands me!

No play-in game winner had ever won the Final Five. No team had ever beaten Denver in the Final Five. tUMD had never won the Broadmoor trophy in the current fashion. A pessimist could say the odds were stacked against them, while an optimist would say it was a perfect storm of opportunity. We had die-hard Gopher fans wearing tUMD jerseys. Everyone who mattered was cheering for the Bulldogs, excluding the DU fans, who had an excuse.

I can't even recap the game because it was just so incredible. UMD was... dominant. MacGregor Sharp was dominant. ALEX STALOCK WAS DOMINANT. Gwoz pulled Cheverie fairly early, in a typically gutsy Gwoz style move, and I remember thinking "GET SHARP ON THE ICE." And of course he was, because he's always on the ice in that situation. Mike Connolly got the puck and brought it up ice and, because he is an incredible guy who plays on an incredible team, he passed the puck to MacGregor Sharp who sent it into the open net for a hat trick. The roar in the Xcel was incredible. You would never have known that only about... oh, maybe 15% of the crowd were wearing UMD gear. I didn't leave the arena until the last Bulldog had left the ice.

The only thing left to worry about, tournament-wise, was where UMD would go. They had secured a 2-seed, pole-vaulting over UND to be the second-seeded WCHA team. Wisconsin was the last man out, and the Gophers just behind them. The selection show was pretty cool, as UMD was one of the only non-#1 seeds that got any attention, and Barry Melrose even picked them to be in the finals, which some people said was the kiss of death but he also picked BU, and they won, so it was hardly that way. Once I found out that tUMD would go to the west regional, I was THRILLED.

Days of plotting ensued. MEg and I spent two nights making posters (we made over 20) and togas, and eight of us suited up and headed over to the Miami-DU game. We made friends with the Miami band, which apparently offended the INCH people, but they were very nice. We were fickle in our allegiance. Or as MEg says, allianceship. An incredibly battered Denver team got bounced out, and we prepared ourselves for our Bulldogs.

UMD scored first, which felt so nice, but Princeton scored three times unanswered, and the UMD faithful started to stress. Just as I was running downstairs to give Sioux-cia her ticket (she was very late), Brady Lamb decided it would be a good time to get his first collegiate goal. Bless you, Brady, you have amazing timing. Princeton scored again shorthanded, and we were down by two goals. It was pretty sad. I refused to let the UMD fans get out-cheered by the Princeton band, so every time they started a cheer, I started one. If we were going to die, we were going to die with our boots on. So to speak.

I can not even describe the impossibility of the final minute of the game. Every time I watch it, it seems more impossible. Here, you can watch it, too.



See what I mean? I don't even know if I knew what happened when Oberg scored. I just know it was like being attacked by an octopus, because everyone was hugging everyone. Togas were falling off. Signs were being ripped. The overtime goal was great, but it was just overshadowed by the game-tying goal.

The next night was heartbreaking. There was controversy, of course, but ultimately UMD lost the game and the season ended, and now Cascalenda, Carroll, Gergen, Greer, Kemp, Meyers, Sharp, Oberg, Stalock, and maybe others will never suit up for the Bulldogs again. It's hard for me to even think about. But they have left a legacy and they have left behind some incredible players who will remember this past season, who will remember nothing is over until it truly is, who will remember what these guys who are leaving have passed on to them. But I also don't want to take anything away from the guys who will come back next year, as they were an integral part of the successes of this season.

I didn't think, when I watched the Frozen Four games, that it would be so hard. I kept thinking how much I wanted the Dogs to be there. It's amazing, however, that they came so close. Bittersweet.

Don't worry, because RWD is going to be open for business for the summer. And don't worry, ladies and gents, because the most popular RWD post of the year is on its way.

No Use For A Title

tUMD 3, WCHA Wanna-bes 2

Yay! We won! Hooray! I didn't drive up here for nothing!!! Glorious!

It's late, and I'm tired and have to be up early to see tUMD's freshman class of 2020 skate around without regard for rules or regulations. It will be thrilling from start to finish.

But so many things happened!

#1!!!!! Jacky got a goal!!! Did I NOT say in last weekend's Numbers that I was expecting a goal out of him??? My powers of prognostication are unparalleled. Eee!

#2!!!!!!!! And it's #2 because Gergy scored 2 goals! Hooray! I was so happy. I wanted to see him get 3. I would not have thrown my hat because it was cloth and would have landed on someone 2 rows ahead of me.

#3!!!!!!!! Oleksuk and Kishel got their first points! SO awesome. Can't wait for Scott to be a real force on our power play and Travis to be a nightmare to opposing goalies!

#4 Montesaurus took his first penalty ever. Weird. I was hoping it would be something more exciting, like just blowing a guy away or something.

The second period was not pleasing to me, but the guys really stepped it up and, thanks to a waved-off goal, dominated the 3rd period. I am hoping that tomorrow night's game will be a rout of those dirty Beavers and they will leave scratching their heads about why exactly they want to be in the WCHA again?

The Numbers
Wins until we equal last season's total: 4 (Non-con... for now)
Points until we equal last season's total: 8 (Non-con... for always, I hope!)

My Guys
MacGregor Sharp: 21
Jack Connolly: 15!
Michael Gergen: 10!
Rob Bordson: 0

Freshmen
Mike Connolly: 18
Jack Connolly: 15!
Scott Kishel: 1!
Travis Oleksuk: 1!
David Grun: 0
Brady Lamb: 0

On Notice:
Rob Bordson
Jay Cascalenda
Jordy Fulton
Matt Greer
Nick Kemp
Josh Meyers
Alex Stalock

Goals Only
Andrew Carroll
Cody Danberg
Mike Montgomery
Trent Palm
Kyle Schmidt
MacGregor Sharp

teltnuaG ehT

Donald attempted to Gauntlet me. He did not succeed. Here are the results. Now step aside and let Mama take over.

(Extremely long wait for Donald to get to his computer)
DTP: Ok ... so should we get this over with? [Well, I waited around for forever, so could we please get on with it?]

RWD: Are you sure you're ready?

DTP: 1st question: Why do you hate Mike Connolly?

RWD: Aww, I don't hate Fuzzy. I'm pro Fuzzy. Some big bad Bronco player threw him into the boards last weekend and I about cut someone, but the REF called a PENALTY and I almost died. [Maybe the system works!]

DTP: Mike senses your overwhelming love for Jack and he isn't amused.

RWD: Oh really? Did your Spidey sense tell you that?

DTP: I'm uncharacteristically intuitive about such things

RWD: I think he's probably happy I'm not a freak over him. He sleeps better at night I'm sure. [Meanwhile, I’m sure Jack is terrified. And rightfully so. I am crazy.]

DTP: Do you agree with Hannes Alfven that in a Universe filled with Plasma that electric currents are pervasive? [Do you agree that no one other than possibly MEg is going to understand that question?]

RWD: I failed my plasma engineering course. The professor was a jackass though. [To him, “short quiz” was actually “horrendously long test.” Didn’t get THAT memo.]

DTP: Are you more or less intellectually curious than Sarah Palin?

RWD: I am a McCain supporter and will not participate in anything that mocks her, though Amy Poehler's rap was amazing.

DTP: Will Sandy give Kenny Reiter a start this weekend?

RWD: I don't know. I don't even know if Kenny is there. I am attempting to find out. Bruce is being reticent. He threatened my life. [He did finally respond but only with information that was either self-evident or irrelevant. Then later his blog had useful information. No.]

DTP: I'll handle Bruce this weekend. Was he pouty cos [stupid foreigner spelling] I didn't show up and say hi last year? [We did not go to Anchorage last year. Maybe he was upset because he donated money to your stupid Final Five fund.]

RWD: Bruce is pouty because I send him barrages of text messages about stupid stuff. [Mom and Dad cover your eyes] While I am driving.

DTP: Did it snow there yet?

RWD: No. But every customer that I talk to that finds out I am in Minnesota asks me that. Or about the Mall of America. [Or they tell me I should be in prison, that I am a criminal, that I don't want to help them, or they just say "Listen young lady..."]

DTP: Be happy that they know Minnesota is a state

RWD: It is THE state. Of hockey.

DTP: Is Sandelin's job on the line this year?

RWD: Yes. There is major talent on this team and if we don't finish better then there's no way I can defend him anymore. I will most likely usurp him.

DTP: What will tUMD fans consider "better"?

RWD: Home ice for the playoffs.

DTP: Coke or Pepsi?

RWD: Coke, definitely coke. And also Coca-Cola.

DTP: Rant on to your own satisfaction about USCHO... [meaning Ugly Stupid Crack Heads Online]

RWD: I don't really mention "that site" on my blog as I don't want to give them any undue publicity. It does give me a nice ego boost; it reminds me of how intelligent I am. It is a fruit roll-up of vulgarity, depravity, and the worst elements of the human psyche. It's like shower shoes covered in mold. I generally go on there only to offend.

DTP: As did I once upon a time

RWD: I can't say I ever read one of your posts but I know I'm much more reserved than you are. I usually forget what posts I've started things in.

DTP: Will the LHC create a black hole?

RWD: St. Cloud State will. With all the negative pressure (vacuums don't suck, people!) coming out of there.

DTP: Compare the Bulldogs defense this year to last years blueliners

RWD: They are... um... Kind of the same? Palm is still Palm. Cascalenda is still Cascalenda. Oberg is back and scoring us goals.

DTP: Garrison is gonzo. [Eeeeeee!]

RWD: Yes but I can't compare Garrison to noGarrison. Mike Montgomery has joined the blueline and is a big kid who knows how to play the offensive side of the game as well. Our penalty kill is not as strong.

DTP: What about Josh Meyers?

RWD: Josh is Josh. He is supposed to be another offensive defenceman but I just can't figure him out. He does score points. I don't know how I feel about him on the PP. I know that Scotty Kishel is going to be a great PP guy in the coming years. He is kind of in and out of the lineup.

DTP: Did you guys get whistled for boatloads of penalties so far?

RWD: Yes. But we always do. I think that we were spoiled last year with an outstanding PK.

DTP: Special Teams looks to be THE "theme" this year.

RWD: I think coaches say that every year. They are always a key element of the game and no team is very successful without good special teams. I think the big problem is if there are more penalties on both sides that more guys need to be ready to fill those roles. Many guys play on both the PP and the PK and we really don't want to kill them.

DTP: The extra-emphasis this year on stick-related offenses is an adjustment all the players will have to make.

RWD: Those Canadians sure were confused during the exhibition games. "Thaaaat's a penalty, eh?"

DTP: What would be more fun --- me coming to Final Five ... or you coming to Anchorage for a series?

RWD: You coming to the Final Five. The Final Five is Holy Week, Donald. I will at some point come to Anchorage I am sure, but the Final Five is so awesome.

DTP: I meant more fun from your perspective.

RWD: That is my perspective.

DTP: I have no doubt I'd have more fun at the Final Five than I would chauffering you around Anchorage. [Like I would get into a car with Donald. I’ve seen The Bone Collector.]

RWD: On your moose. Or your... what did you call it... snow "machine?"

DTP: You should know that if you're a McCainiac

RWD: He is my hero.

DTP: Lovely.

RWD: Are you sure you want to have that on your blog? Aren't you afraid people might be a little enlightened? [LOOK OUT, LIBERAL MEDIA!!! HERE I AM!!!! A NON-OLD, UTTERLY STUNNING AND BRILLIANT CONSERVATIVE!!!]

DTP: I'm not concerned about your political leanings on my blog. Anything I say overwhelms it. Enlightened and Sarah Palin are not three words you'd normally see together.

RWD: My word is like the word of God.

DTP: Then tell me Yahweh .... what are the final scores this weekend?

RWD: You're done already? That's IT?

DTP: What? ‘Cos I asked the final scores? [Have you not read a Gauntlet before? Freaking amateur!] Don’t assume.

RWD: Okay, then. I was concerned. [I wasn’t done basking in my own self-importance.] 4-3 tUMD, 4-0 tUMD. Jacky with a goal. Fuzzy with 2.
DTP: LOL [Not sure what’s funny.]

RWD: I went above and beyond there.

DTP: Will you be watching on the web?

RWD: Probably. Is that naughty Santa going to be on?

DTP: I don't know who is advertising this year. I don't watch it much ya know. [Oh yah you betcha!]

DTP: How is UAA's stream compared to others?

RWD: It is great compared to any of the crap I see on B2. Like CC's floating tiger head, for example.

DTP: That thing is psychologically damaging I fear. When was the last time you and Bethlyn were stumble-down drunk together?

RWD: We never have been. I don't think I've ever been drunk in her presence.

DTP: Sigh ... boring. [This is not Penthouse Forum, Donald.]

RWD: I know. When I visited her I came down with bronchitis almost immediately upon arrival. So I didn't drink very much. I had like I sip of something. I do not need to drink to have a good time.

DTP: But you're more fun when you do.

RWD: Eh. Possibly. I'm a really mean drunk.

DTP: It's from a Holiday Inn commercial.

RWD: I have a DVR. I don't watch commercials.

DTP: Naturally. Can I ask an Entourage question?

RWD: I don't watch that either. [I think I’d prefer a commercial.]

DTP: Of course. Shouldn't you really just turn into a Gopher fan? I mean ... isn't that how it works down there?

RWD: I don't see the point. I cannot WAIT to see tDogs win their first NC. No Gopher fan can say that. The[ Gophers] are not the Borg. Resistance is not futile. Not as many people in Minneapolis are Gopher hockey fans as you might think. I mean, Donald, if I was going to be a Gopher fan, I would be. I was born (technically) on campus at the UMTC medical center. You can't get any more into the heart of Gopher country than that.

DTP: Hence my question.

RWD: But I grew up a Dogs fan. It's hereditary. I'd be disowned. Also I went to another big 10 school. [MICHIGAN SUCKS!!!!]

DTP: What team do you dislike (hate) most?

RWD: St. Cloud.

DTP: Are you as apathetic as me about Mankato?

RWD: No. I'm semi-pro Mankato. I have a lot of family there. But I can see how someone might be that way.

DTP: I'm trying to work up more hatred for them but I find them boring.

RWD: Juttz sucks. His wife is my idol though. [The mother of all cougars!!!]

DTP: What about UND? Where are they on your list?

RWD: I could not possibly care less about UND. They bore me.

DTP: Denver?

RWD: Denver is a force to be reckoned with this year.

DTP: Colorado College?

RWD: CC had better get on their horse and figure out if they're going to be a great team. Because, um, 1-0 against UAH?

DTP: UAH's goalie stood on his head.

RWD: They will be on the top 3 in the league but they need to transcend to the macrocosm if they're going to go anywhere. Great teams win those games by lots of goals. I am overly critical, but whatever. [What the heck do I care? We will take them down.]

DTP: Are you happy to get a new rink before UAA?

RWD: I am happy to get a new rink sooner rather than later. It would be nice if UAA got one, too, but I didn't feel any competitive vibes.

DTP: I recall you expressing suicide as an alternative if UAA were to get a rink before you guys

RWD: I am prone to hyperbole. And poor memory.

DTP: Ever had chicken-pox?

RWD: Yes, on Christmas. I gave it to my mom, too.

DTP: Ouch... you [female dog].

DTP: Did you cut your bangs to match Sarah's "do"?

RWD: My hair is curly and so it wouldn't really look the same. I'm actually growing it out. I got it cut kind of short when Bethlyn was here in March and felt regret. I'm actually thinking of maybe dying it white like McCain [I would look hot] for solidarity.

DTP: Make sure you use the same dye he does.

RWD: I'm sorry, is this a hockey interview? You're making it seem like I care about politics. This is not an impression I like to give.

DTP: Compare this year’s Bulldog offense to last year’s.

RWD: This year >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> last year. What else can I say? I mean... last year was just sort of a mess.

DTP: Just trying to steer it back to hockey after your politics meltdown. Are the t'dogs a 2 line or 3 line team?
RWD: Right now they are a 2 line team but they will probably become a 3 line team.

DTP: How many games do you think Stalock will play this year?

RWD: Almost all of them. I'm thinking like 40.

DTP: Do you think that will leave the team in a bit of a spot next year if Stalock doesn't return?

RWD: No, I think Brady is going to be a great goalie for us.

DTP: But Sandy won't play him much this year? Wouldn't it be a good idea to play the backup versus UAA this weekend?

RWD: I think Stalock is the horse that Sandy is going to ride. I would have thought we would see Brady last weekend. I wonder what would have happened if we had... [Love you Al, but for reals homey, that was not your best game.]

DTP: UAA goes to UMD to play on the last WCHA weekend this season. Will you be at those games?

RWD: I might. If I have school I won't.

DTP: What is your earliest memory of a Seawolf?

RWD: It's fairly vague. When I was young we would sometimes go up to my grandparents’ cabin on weekends in the winter and we would watch tUMD games on a super old tv. And sometimes those games would involve UAA. Now a whole generation of children will be deprived of that because tUMD is no longer on TV.

DTP: Do you miss Sertie?

RWD: I don't, I think it's great for him to enjoy retirement.

DTP: Does Sertie attend games at the DECC?

RWD: I don't know. Maybe? We're not BFFs.

DTP: Shouldn't that be BFsF?

RWD: No. It's just like when people say RsBI in baseball. I mean, I guess technically I should say BFF.

DTP: lol

RWD: But a "BFF" is kind of a noun, so it's pluralized as is.

DTP: You take the dumb questions so seriously. [If I didn’t take the dumb questions seriously, there would be none to take seriously.]

RWD: I feel strongly about this subject, actually. I can't stand when people type RsBI. Or "ribbies."

DTP: You are truly the Acronym Queen.

RWD: I love them. The Gophers Invite Cupcakes So We Don't Get Embarrassed At Our Own Tournament is just too long to type. GICSWEDGEAOOT is better. It almost says "Swede" in the middle. Damn that's not right.

DTP: Ultra-cool almost.

RWD: GICSWDGEAOOT. There we go.

DTP: I pay "homage" [Why is homage in quotations? I’m sure because Donald is probably pronouncing it in some foreign way.] to your love of acronyms when I can on my blog ... ever notice?

RWD: You have a blog? It's hard to tell what you're writing. You need more white space.

DTP: Yeah I know... all those words are a problem

RWD: The problem is, they are boring. No offense. [Hee]

DTP: None taken. But they aren't boring.

RWD: I'm sure to a Seawolf fan, they might not be.

DTP: They are each useful and important to make the necessary point. I'm all out of prewritten questions.

RWD: Those were prepared in advance???

DTP: A few were.

RWD: Not as easy as it looks, is it? Bow to the master.

DTP: Let me find a mirror. [Gotta look nice when you genuflect!]

RWD: So are you going to continue this interview or what?

DTP: I thought I'd just let you dangle there and decide.

RWD: Man did I ever get off easy.

DTP: Your offense at certain lines of questions kept it short.

RWD: I'm just not overly political. Also, the Gauntlet's main purpose is offense.

DTP: This isn't the Gauntlet. [No you-know-what, Sherlock.] It's a Gauntlet rip-off

RWD: It is.

DTP: It walks like the Gauntlet, it talks like the Gauntlet, but it is not the Gauntlet. Typing Gauntlet three times is hard. [But four is comparatively easier.]

RWD: It doesn't really talk like the Gauntlet.

DTP: More evidence that it is not the gauntlet then eh? [Friggin’ Canadian.] I gots to run to pick up dinner. [Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit, foo!]

RWD: Oh, did someone drive by your house and hit a rodent?

And… scene!

Lithium

UMD 3, Ref Complainers 8

What kind of a fanbase whines about officiating when their team wins by 5 goals? UND Blogger Goon should be ashamed of himself. Evidently, Sioux fans are only satisfied when zero penalties are called on the Sioux and their opponent is down 2 men for the entire game. Plus, since the UND PP was pretty much crap last night, I would think they wouldn't want to showcase that too much. Not that they'd ever give our PK any credit.

Yeah, I know, I sound like a sore loser right now. It's not that. I just hate playing this series. I resent the implication by many of the UND fans that we don't even deserve to play their team, that we should just roll over and die because our team is worthless and the only team worth their time is UMTC, with whom they are obsessed. I really wish that tDogs could have shown that we were better than that, and for moments during the game, they did. I felt like I developed acute bipolar disorder during the course of the game.

There are five parts to this game. I will divide and conquer.

The first 6 or so minutes of the game were fine. It didn't seem like much was going on. Blah blah blah.

Then UND scored 3 goals in 1:23, including a goal that didn't take any skill on their part, just garbage play on our part, 45 seconds after our timeout. I was crabby beyond belief at this point. My cat was cowering in fear.

With 3 seconds left in the period, Nick Kemp scored ON THE POWER PLAY. FINALLY, A POWER PLAY GOAL! RAISE A BANNER! (Wait, this isn't St. Cloud.) To start the 2nd period, we scored 2 more goals in the first 5 minutes, including Kyle Schmidt's first Bulldog goal (!!!) and Mike Montgomery's first assist (!!!), and it was tied. I was on top of the world. My 'Dogs had shown they could come back with a vengeance.

Then it was 4-3, and then 5-3, and I was still pretty much okay, thinking you know, at least we fought a good fight, and that stupid crap goal was no longer the GWG.

When it became 6-3, I was back to pissed off again. And then the rest of the game happened, and then I lay siege on Tokyo.

Photo: Associated Press.

I'm hoping we can come back tonight and play well defensively as well as offensively. We're a Saturday night team, and I know we can recover! Let's split it, 'Dogs!!

THE NUMBERS
Wins Until We Surpass Last Year's Total: 4
Points Until We Surpass Last Year's Total: 11

My Guys:
MacGregor Sharp: 7
Michael Gergen: 6!
Matt McKnight: 5
Mike Curry: 1

Freshmen:
Justin Fontaine: 3!
Cody Danberg: 1
Rob Bordson: 1
Kyle Schmidt: 1!!!!!!!!
Mike Montgomery: 1!!!!!!!!
Chad Huttel: 0
Evan Oberg: 0 (INJ)

On Notice:
Points
Evan Oberg
Jay Cascalenda
Andrew Carroll
Matt Greer
Cody Danberg
Jordan Fulton

Goals only
Drew Akins
Jason Garrison
Travis Gawryletz
Alex Stalock
Trent Palm
MacGregor Sharp
Justin Fontaine