Hits From The Blog, Part Deux

It's been awhile since I've been lazy enough to do this, so I've got some good crazy stuff saved up. There are some twisted people out there, coming to RWD. And writing it.

Somewhat Hockey-Related
mike zacharias budweiser i take it he's a big fan.
t.j. oshie beer bong people, get it right. that was jonathan toews.
greer Macgregor is this some sort of science experiment gone wrong?
euthanasia, nick kemp is that really necessary? can't we just put him out to stud?
the drunk hockey guy blog umd doesn't exist yet. you're stuck with rwd.
don lucia complaining imagine that!
bulldog with fire helmet more like fire helmet with bulldog.

Hockey Player Stalker Hits
drew akins is cute probably a meanegirl hit.
is mike sertich of duluth minnesota married wow, even sertie gets stalked!
rob bordson is so hot yes.
uaa nathan lawson girlfriend i hope she's combing the beaches, because he is washed up.
josh meyers shirtless yes yes.
bryan mcgregor girlfriend i wonder what he's up to?
stu bickel girlfriend another meanegirl hit.
tyler bozak girlfriend probably dumped him when he got his knee injury.
tony lucia girlfriend ...is jay barriball.
tj oshie apartment on you tube for what? dirtiest apartment ever?
alex goligoski girlfriend ...is ryan potulny.
tyler ruegsegger girlfriend hopefully did not get projectile-vomited on.
glenn fisher girlfriend who? oh wait, that du guy.
jordan parise gf to be fair, the gf could stand for grand forks.
rob nolan girlfriend ...is rwd.
tj oshie girlfriend should probably not view "tj oshie apartment on you tube."
matt smaby engaged someone cares?
jonathan toews shirtless with a beer bong, i hope!

What the...????
when does air bud hockey come out i don't know, but i can't wait!!!
good rat keeping i guess you clean their cage and feed them and stuff.
boosh hot dogs the game yeah, i'm sure that happened.
making of the game banana is the "game banana" some sort of trophy for gorilla footballers?
rat bleeding from ears probably resulted from bad rat keeping.
cowbell penalty two minutes for not enough!
that heartless bitch, thb tech hockey blog?
christmas dogs midget performance i'm assuming this show is in tijuana.
my legs are extremely long does not apply here.
i'm a guy, and i want grow my hair out like jason micheal carrol's, but until then, how should i manage my hair? ask hollywood clark!
your so into hockey and you don't even know it t-shirts i would never wear that grammatically incorrect shirt.
why women don't like hockey because we're too busy making sandwiches and fetching beers.
home improvement brad shirtless in locker room who wants to see the mullet kid shirtless?
outline of bronco for pumpkin carving that seems useful.
rhyme master rwd yo yo yo, peace out homeslice.
where to go in denver if you're single co14ers' house.
why do people cut off deer heads on the side of the road because they are lousy shots.
shopko temple of doom i see someone shares my point of view.
political affiliation ted Kaczynski same as donald's.
dogs that coach people i don't think they exist. i searched.
jack i don't think they are ready for this that's what she said.
real life fights between badger and dogs ask cody danberg for footage.
wow fhg that's what cardinal said.
does jack daniels have turpentine in it? does it matter?
i kissed a goon and i liked it?
what happened in the houghton temple ...stays in the houghton temple.
runnin and quantum theory you've come to the right place!

The All-WCHA Hottie Teams

There is one thing that sets RWD apart from all other college hockey blogs. No, not its utter uselessness, as there are many other useless college hockey blogs. It is the All-WCHA Hottie Awards, which are generally done in April, but due to 1. Laziness and 2. Extreme Workaholicness, here they are in May. For those of you who were in a panic, thinking they weren't coming, fear not. I always come through for my readers... eventually.

So, here we are!

Coach: Jamie Russell****, MTU
Assistant Coach: Brett Larson, UMD
Blogger: StartTheBus of The Bus Stops Here! Still the greatest blog to ever come out of St. Cloud!

LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD
Once in awhile, there comes along a hottie so amazing that he needs singling out. After four years of dominating the All-Hottie List and the hearts of college hockey fans, he has graduated and there will be a gaping void in his place. Not only is he an amazingly hot hottie on the outside, he's an incredibly nice person on the inside, and really, when you're hot, you don't have to be nice. (At least this is my excuse.) So, Robby Nolan, I am naming the First Team All-Hottie Goalie spot after you. I will miss you and your crazy sweatpants ritual before games, your blindingly white teeth, your penchant for wearing very strange clothing, your handsome face, and your kindness. Best of luck as you begin the next leg of your journey!

1st team:
F MacGregor Sharp**, UMD
F Malcolm Gwillam*, MTU
F Darcy Zajac*, UND
D Geoff Kinrade*, MTU
D David Carlisle*, SCSU
G Robby Nolan***, MTU

2nd team:
F Ryan Peckskamp**, SCSU
F Jack Connolly, UMD
F Chris VandeVelde**, UND
D JP Testwuide*, DU
D Brady Lamb, UMD
G Alex Stalock*, UMD

3rd Team:
F Michael Gergen*, UMD
F Jordan Baker*, MTU
F Matt Greer, UMD
D Kane LaFranchise*, UAA
D Drew Dobson*, MTU
G Mike Zacharias, MSUM

Freshman Team:
F Jack Connolly, UMD
F Jake Hansen, UMTC
F Justin Jokinen, MSUM
D Brady Lamb, UMD
D Nicholas Rioux, SCSU
G Lars Paulgaard, DU

* denotes two-time honoree
** denotes three-time honoree
*** denotes four-time honoree
**** denotes five-time honoree

Some notes:
CC players are missing because their roster pix are all down.
MSUM and MTU have their new rosters up, and so their seniors are missing and I had to get creative.

UMD's website doesn't have links to individual players, so again, creativity. Argh.
UW players are missing because they are ugly.

The freshman team was very painful to put together. Half the guys on there are just plugged in because I had to put someone. And yes, I know, Paulgaard looks insane.

The Way We Were

Yes, I know. It has been an unacceptably long time since I last posted, and unlike other season's finales, there's been a ridiculous amount of GOOD content about which to write. If you cared, I am sorry, but the end of the season gave me a lot to sift through and it deserved my full attention. Even now, though this post is more like a novel, I feel like I haven't done it justice, but it's a try.

I don't know of any Bulldog fan who on some level was not ready to pack it in after the UAA series. I mean, some were entirely ready to do so or had already, while some remained cautiously optimistic. I had a post kind of already plotted out in case something terrible happened, which I sort of remember now, weeks and eons later. It certainly felt as though we were headed for another futile, Fitzgerald-esque off-season. You know, "So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past." Another mediocre finish.

Instead, we got one of the wildest finishes to a season that could possibly be imagined in the drug-addled hallucinations of a schizophrenic.

It started in CC. I was actually rather pleased that we had drawn CC rather than any of the myriad other teams we could have played. Yes, we'd only played them once, but we'd played them at home and had totally rocked it. In fact, it was the only team we had fared well against away from home.

tUMD scored 7 goals in those two games and never trailed. It was incredible. They played in a commanding fashion and despite CC's best attempts to kill our players, the Bulldogs swept them into the off-season. Travis Oleksuk burst onto the college hockey scene, and Alex Stalock made an impossible-looking save, as he is wont to do.

God, was that ever a long time ago. Almost a month ago, to be exact. I was incredibly depressed that I couldn't go to the games in CC as I had to work.

The days before the Final Five seemed tortuously slow. On top of that, the crazy PWR-heads had crunched some rather terrifying numbers: there were multiple scenarios in which the Bulldogs would still miss the NCAA tournament. Funny how we'd gone from lookin' good to almost surely out to possibly back in it within a few weeks. Pretty indicative of the season as a whole.

The play-in game was probably the most terrifying game I'd attended, simply because I was almost entirely surrounded by Gopher fans. It ended up not being that bad though, as all the UND fans were cheering against the Gophers, which meant they were cheering for tUMD. I also saw a group of St. Cloud fans in their jerseys with print-outs of tUMD's logo pinned to the fronts. Dirty and MEg both donned UMD gear as well. I have never seen them look more attractive.

I don't believe in fate or destiny, but when I look back on that weekend, I have never seen anything go so right in my entire life. Certainly not for a team that I follow.

It started off well. Gopher goalie Alex Kangas had was fighting off the flu (whether it was influenza or the oft-mislabeled gastroenteritis, I don't know nor do I want to) and it was unclear if he would even play, but he's a gamer and so he was out there. Barely three minutes into the game, Kangas misplayed a rebound and MacGregor Sharp scored the first goal of the game. The UMD fans in attendance, as well as the Gopher haters, made the Xcel sound fairly loud. Five minutes later, UMD found themselves two men short for slightly over a minute, and I really started to stress. Penalty killing had not been a strength over the season, and though they had been must better in CC, they had given up a 6x4 goal and a 6x5 goal. tDogs managed to kill it off, and went into the locker room at intermission with a lead. The Gophers came out in the second with Patterson in net and Kangas on the bench, apparently too sick to continue. The second period saw the always hard-working Matt Greer put the Dogs up another goal, but despite the best efforts of my dear friend and our DanceMania antics, I could NOT calm down. In the third, the Gophers scored early on a weird deflection type goal, which would be the only goal to beat Stalock that weekend. Then I REALLY stressed. The clock could not POSSIBLY go any slower. Once time started running out, I kept one eye on the play and one eye on Patterson. tUMD managed to control play enough that the Gophers couldn't pull him until there were 38 seconds left, and still the Gophers nearly had a great scoring chance, if not for the brilliant hooking penalty Andrew Carroll took, which could not be assessed before time ran out.

The first task completed, tDogs now faced possibly a more daunting prospect: they absolutely needed to win one of the next two games in order to guarantee entry into the NCAAs, and they had to face a team on a roll: UND. Allegiances changed: UND fans were (of course) cheering against tUMD, while only the bitterest of Gopher fans stayed off the UMD bandwagon. I really stressed, again. This was overall a very stressful weekend for me!!! In addition to the games, I had three exams, and I actually skipped the Friday afternoon game to study. Or to attempt to study, as I was terribly distracted.

Stalock recently edged out UND goaltender Brad Eidsness for the WCHA goaltending title by an incredibly slim margin, so many touted it as a battle to see who really could claim the title. Eidsness decided he wanted to show he could beat Stalock at his own game, and while Fonzie was in the box serving a too many men on the ice penalty, Brad went behind the net to play the puck and made a blind pass to MacGregor Sharp, who quickly tucked the puck into the net before Eidsness could finish crapping himself. Mike Montgomery added another hard-working goal in the first period, and the Dogs had a nice lead at the end of the first. Of course, I was still stressed out, but you know me. In the second period, Brady Lamb was handed a major penalty for kneeing Matt Watkins. I went home and watched the game again on my DVR, and I will tell you folks, it was not a kneeing penalty. Watkins came off the bench and skated right into Brady Lamb, who is clearly going after the puck. He makes an odd leg motion, but if you look closely, he's trying to accelerate, not trying to take out Watkins, who as I already said, skated right into him. Watkins was injured, which was unfortunate, but not every injury in hockey is a penalty. UMD killed the major penalty in a textbook manner, and the only subsequent goal was an empty netter from Mike Connolly, who popped his jersey and made a bunch of people get their undies in a bunch. I have no problem with the jersey pop, as long as they're popping the front and not the back. I was so excited after the game I looked up at DHG in the club level and screamed "WE'RE GONNA DANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Saturday came. The day of reckoning. tUMD was essentially playing with the house's money at this point. I was taking a ridiculously hard test and then another test that was not as hard and then I made it over to see the rest of the UW/DU game. And of course, despite everyone's logical arguments and soothing platitudes, I was stressed out. I was probably not helping myself because between periods at each game, the only other person in the building more stressed out than I came over and we probably ended up stressing ourselves out MORE. Although it is nice to have someone who understands me!

No play-in game winner had ever won the Final Five. No team had ever beaten Denver in the Final Five. tUMD had never won the Broadmoor trophy in the current fashion. A pessimist could say the odds were stacked against them, while an optimist would say it was a perfect storm of opportunity. We had die-hard Gopher fans wearing tUMD jerseys. Everyone who mattered was cheering for the Bulldogs, excluding the DU fans, who had an excuse.

I can't even recap the game because it was just so incredible. UMD was... dominant. MacGregor Sharp was dominant. ALEX STALOCK WAS DOMINANT. Gwoz pulled Cheverie fairly early, in a typically gutsy Gwoz style move, and I remember thinking "GET SHARP ON THE ICE." And of course he was, because he's always on the ice in that situation. Mike Connolly got the puck and brought it up ice and, because he is an incredible guy who plays on an incredible team, he passed the puck to MacGregor Sharp who sent it into the open net for a hat trick. The roar in the Xcel was incredible. You would never have known that only about... oh, maybe 15% of the crowd were wearing UMD gear. I didn't leave the arena until the last Bulldog had left the ice.

The only thing left to worry about, tournament-wise, was where UMD would go. They had secured a 2-seed, pole-vaulting over UND to be the second-seeded WCHA team. Wisconsin was the last man out, and the Gophers just behind them. The selection show was pretty cool, as UMD was one of the only non-#1 seeds that got any attention, and Barry Melrose even picked them to be in the finals, which some people said was the kiss of death but he also picked BU, and they won, so it was hardly that way. Once I found out that tUMD would go to the west regional, I was THRILLED.

Days of plotting ensued. MEg and I spent two nights making posters (we made over 20) and togas, and eight of us suited up and headed over to the Miami-DU game. We made friends with the Miami band, which apparently offended the INCH people, but they were very nice. We were fickle in our allegiance. Or as MEg says, allianceship. An incredibly battered Denver team got bounced out, and we prepared ourselves for our Bulldogs.

UMD scored first, which felt so nice, but Princeton scored three times unanswered, and the UMD faithful started to stress. Just as I was running downstairs to give Sioux-cia her ticket (she was very late), Brady Lamb decided it would be a good time to get his first collegiate goal. Bless you, Brady, you have amazing timing. Princeton scored again shorthanded, and we were down by two goals. It was pretty sad. I refused to let the UMD fans get out-cheered by the Princeton band, so every time they started a cheer, I started one. If we were going to die, we were going to die with our boots on. So to speak.

I can not even describe the impossibility of the final minute of the game. Every time I watch it, it seems more impossible. Here, you can watch it, too.



See what I mean? I don't even know if I knew what happened when Oberg scored. I just know it was like being attacked by an octopus, because everyone was hugging everyone. Togas were falling off. Signs were being ripped. The overtime goal was great, but it was just overshadowed by the game-tying goal.

The next night was heartbreaking. There was controversy, of course, but ultimately UMD lost the game and the season ended, and now Cascalenda, Carroll, Gergen, Greer, Kemp, Meyers, Sharp, Oberg, Stalock, and maybe others will never suit up for the Bulldogs again. It's hard for me to even think about. But they have left a legacy and they have left behind some incredible players who will remember this past season, who will remember nothing is over until it truly is, who will remember what these guys who are leaving have passed on to them. But I also don't want to take anything away from the guys who will come back next year, as they were an integral part of the successes of this season.

I didn't think, when I watched the Frozen Four games, that it would be so hard. I kept thinking how much I wanted the Dogs to be there. It's amazing, however, that they came so close. Bittersweet.

Don't worry, because RWD is going to be open for business for the summer. And don't worry, ladies and gents, because the most popular RWD post of the year is on its way.

Forget Pretense

I'm just going to tell you what you want, and you are going to like it.

Comrades, you want:

Tech to annihilate Minnesota-Twin Cities

Mankato to pulverize St. Cloud

North Dakota to disembowel Wisconsin

Denver to incinerate Colorado College

and

your UMD BULLDOGS to sweep the Seawolves!!!!

If these things occur, then I'll have one more trip up to Duluth this season!!!

Andrew, Jay, Josh, MacGregor, Nick, Matt and Michael: I'm counting on you, just as I always have for the past four years.

Additionally, I should announce the winner from the previous poll. With 14 votes (well, really 13, because I voted once), the winner is... THEY ARE ALL CREEPY!!!! Thanks to everyone who voted early and often.

The John

tUMD 2, Corporate Drones 2

Hello, all! Are we all exhilarated and refreshed after the stressful tie last night? Are we all so nervous our hearts are pounding faster than a hummingbird's wings? Don't leave me hangin' here!

I was so stressed last night. And the entire day preceding the game. And pretty much ever since I recovered from my trip to Houghton. And a tie is incredibly stressful for me because of its potential to swing from 1 point to 0 in a matter of seconds. Especially when tUMD's all-star rocking forecheckers didn't GO TO THE NET ENOUGH. ESPECIALLY ON THE POWER PLAYS, GUYS. Seriously. Peppermint Patty was leaving you nice sexy rebounds to romance into the net, and y'all were like "We just want to CYCLE!!!" Seriously, though, tUMD put on a CLINIC in pressure in the offensive zone in the 3rd period. However, not enough players registered for the break-out session on goal-scoring.

It's no surprise to see who stepped up in this game. MATT GREER and NICK KEMP, two SENIORS. Greer's goal was just... ok I should have watched the tape delay so I could really write about it, but I happened to be looking right down on it and on the initial shot or pass or whatever I was like "Nooooo" because I didn't think it came at Matty at a good angle but then he just made it work. Tim Gunn would be proud. Kemp's goal was an awesome garbage goal that Peppermint Patty couldn't keep out of the net. Honestly I can't believe the whistle wasn't blown or something but MIRACLE OF MIRACLES the officials never lost sight of the puck. The Gopher goals came on 1.) Stalock being Stalock and 2. Shenanigans so I'm feeling pretty good about tonight's game. I think that UMTC should probably put away the checkbook and save any money earmarked for tonight's ref payoffs for the 09-10 campaign; what is the point? Even winning out may not help their cause.

I'd like to talk for a moment about YET ANOTHER reason why I'm glad I'm not a Gopher fan. There are just so many, but their precious palace is one that I'm probably in the minority on. I think for a college atmosphere, it's just... terrible. My #1 complaint is that when I am yelling, only like 1% of the people in the arena can hear me. Trust me, I'm yelling for a reason, you want to hear it. Unless like in the 2nd period when I yelled "LET'S GO POWER PLAY!" when we were 4 on 4. I could not count, evidently. But I think the clock guy heard me because there was only a Gopher penalty on the board. But other than swallowing up the noise of the individual, the arena sucks because there's no sense of unity among the fans. Even the student sections couldn't get together, and they are on a cheering schedule. Cheer at an unscheduled time, and one of the 8,000-year-old ushers will ask you to leave. Oh, and also, when Thug4life Jake Hansen took out Greer and Suz was running onto the ice, the music folks decided to play "Another One Bites The Dust." Ok, Music Person, I'm pretty classless at arenas at times, but I'm not in any way affiliated with tUMD. YOU are, and you suck. SANCTIONS! One final thought: how come no one can trash talk well with me? Someone asked me "Are all UMD fans like you?" and I said "They aren't as cute as me," and he said "That must have been a long bus ride." Then later when T-Lu and the Sheriff took their OT matching penalties, I was laughing about Sunday dinner at the Lucia house and how Tony would be in trouble, and the wife of the previously mentioned person said "He'll get extra dessert." What? People, try harder.

Sigh. I'm in class right now and don't have my Numbers. I just know that Matty G and Kemper the Wrecker are OFF NOTICE!!!!

Come on 'Dogs!!! No giving away charity points tonight! Go for the jugular!!

Endzone

tUMD 1 Touchdown, Mankato's Football Team 2 Safeties


I'm glad I drove up here. This will be a short post because I am watching Katt Williams on Comedy Central and it is entertaining.

I missed much of the 1st period because I was still driving up. Depressingly, I missed my Jacky's goal (though I heard it on the radio) AND Josh Meyers's goal (because I was waiting for InebriatedMike in the ticket lobby while he was waiting for me at the back entrance), and I was starting to wonder if I was a curse because we did not score any more goals until Monkey scored.

I feel sorry for Troy Jutting. I mean, not just because he is super uggo and gross, but also because he does not understand what sport he is coaching. That's really the only explanation for tonight's play. It was rough for tDogs in the 2nd period because they let Mankato dictate what game was being played, and it was Maverick Football, not Bulldog Hockey.

In the 3rd period, I got a call from one of my friends with 9 minutes to go. He asked about the score and I said "It's 4-3... we're losing." I was pretty crabby. The PK was rough and the PP was hurting a bit from the shorty. Later on I was telling him about the game and he was like "They really scored 4 goals in 9 minutes?" I didn't even realize it. Wow. Amazing. What's also amazing is how much food you can get from Taco John's for $25: 2 sodas, 1 order of chicken quesadillas, 2 hard shell tacos, 3 softshell tacos, 3 orders of Potato Oles, 1 buffalo chicken burrito, 1 side of nacho cheese, 1 side of sour cream, and a side of guacamole. Heavenly. Mom, I'm sure you're jealous. But the 3rd period was a smorgasbord of scoring: Sherrif Andrew Carroll said "No way are we going to let this herd of cattle run wild on OUR rink," and tied the game. Then Captain Greer decided he needed to get in on the scoring, assisted by Super Sexy Shirtless Brady Lamb! All three captains scored in the game!!!! That's awesome. MCON decided he DEFINITELY did not want to be On Notice and got his own goal, and then Jordan Fulton kicked an extra point with 33 seconds to go.

I sat in the student section tonight, and they were AWESOME in the 3rd period. I've often stressed that it doesn't matter WHAT they say, just that they are LOUD and PROUD (like 2 certain Gopher fans I know...). The student section was so rocking tonight that we couldn't even get chants going in our section because the next section had already started one! And then... many of them left before the end of the game. Screw them. Also, students, there is no reason to drink so much that you vomit on yourself or your friends while in your seat. If you're going to do that, why even bother attending the game?

I'd like to write more, and I probably will, but it's 2:17 and I have to be up to drive home in like... 7 hours. And I have tacos to eat, and miles to go before I sleep.

The Numbers (abbreviated until I'm home again)
Wins until we equal last season's total: 2! (Yay! We're comin'! We're comin'!)
Points until we equal last season's total: 4! (AMAZING!!!)

My Guys
MacGregor Sharp: 26!
Jack Connolly: 20!
Michael Gergen: 11
Rob Bordson: 0

Freshmen
Mike Connolly: 22!
Jack Connolly: 20! (Sorry I missed your goal!)
Scott Kishel: 2
Brady Lamb: 1! (Yay Brady! And your dad was there to see it!)
Travis Oleksuk: 1
David Grun: 0

We're Not Mercyhurst!

Hello, everyone! Are you all sleepy from your 4 a.m. jaunts to Walmart for cheap crap that no one wants to receive from you because they already know it's cheap Walmart crap? I'll take a gift receipt, please. Oh, we may have some St. Cloud fans in the hizzy this weekend, so I'll try to make them feel included. Did you enjoy your campout at FleetFarm to get the lastest fashions from Carhart? Something in a coverall, perhaps?

Now, let's talk about the real turkeys: Duh Huskies!!! (Heather, you can stop reading now. It's better this way.)

"St. Cloud State University: you'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy." Ah, Obi-Wan, you sure do know what you're talking about.

We really laid the hurt down on St. Cloud in the first game of the series. In case you've forgotten, here is the box score and here is my recap. One is informative. The other is not. Guess which one!!!

To recap the recaps, the Connollys Connollied all over the Huskies. There was only one goal that was not either a direct or indirect result of a Connolly, and it was scored by Matt Greer from Andrew Carroll and Trent Palm. I always love goals where random combinations of people score. I mean, yes, Carroll and Greer were on the same line and all, but... well... they're not exactly Bill Watson and Brett Hull. But, it was a very exciting goal and I was very unstressed once they scored. tUMD also went 3/7 on the power play and 6/6 on the penalty kill. Bob Vader tried to pull another Kronick by inserting *itch Ryan onto the 2nd line, but he barely touched the ice (yet managed to be -1 as he was on the ice for the first goal) and only showed up on the stat sheet by taking a boarding penalty.

Some things have changed. St. Cloud swept Denver after Denver swept us. They also split with Wisconsin whereas we only had 1 sad little point. St. Cloud also eked out a few wins against college hockey powerhouse Robert Morris. We took three against perennial bottom-feeder North Dakota. Chris Hepp cut his mullet. *itch Ryan hasn't played since tX.

Some things have stayed the same. St. Cloud still has a terrible power play. They have 1 power play goal in conference play. ONE POWER PLAY GOAL. That is a power play percentage of 2.2%. I'm feeling pretty good about our pk. I always feel good about our PK, especially when Matty Greer is taking care of business out there.

I'm trying to figure out Garrett Roe's status by wading through the SCCC season thread on USCHO (barf) but all I can find is domestic bickering between the cousin/sibling/spouses on there. Okay, something actually posted in the game thread and it appears Roe will be playing despite a BRUISE on his LEFT ARM. REPEAT: A BRUISE ON HIS LEFT ARM. DO YOU READ, ME? OVER. Well, I guess that means there will be two crybabies on the ice instead of just the usual Ryan Lasch. (HEATHER!! I TOLD YOU TO STOP READING!!!)

We need two points this weekend. Sic 'em, Dogs. Stick salute tomorrow night!

Things To Do In Denver When You're Dead

It's been tough times for Scotty "The Saint" Sandelin. He's been out from under the thumb of crime boss Dean "Blazer" Blais for eight years and he's still trying to go legit. His Bulldogs haven't had the greatest of years these past few years, and a few years ago they majorly pissed off another pillar of the mob community, "The Man With The Plan," also known as "Curious George." Apparently The Saint owed a debt to Curious George, and he called in the note. The Man With The Plan wanted his boys to get shaken up, get ready for the playoffs, and he wanted The Saint and his boys to surprise the Pioneers with a little upset in the first game of the playoffs, you know, to keep them hungry and all. (Here's what actually happened. But don't go here if you don't like Christopher Walken, bad words, or hobos being beaten up. And if that is the case, I feel like it's best if you and I part ways.) Sandelin had no choice but to gather together a group of his best guys and carry out the Man's orders.

Well, we all know what happened there. Sandelin's boys got a little crazy and ended up taking out the Pioneers entirely. Not only did they miss the Final Five, but they also failed to make the NCAA tournament despite being finishing 2nd in the WCHA. And The Man With The Plan was not happy.

Today after the WCHA coaches had their conference call and Sandelin showed up to practice looking totally freaked out.

"What's the matter, Coach?" asked Josh "Easy Wind" Meyers. But he didn't get an answer, The Saint just stared.

"Really, Sandy, what's the deal?" Critical Nick [really, Nick, I am sorry that you had to be this guy... if you haven't seen the movie, you just don't want to know] pressed him for answers. He exchanged a look with Matt "Pieces" Greer and Andrew "Franchise" Carroll. They all know something is up.

Finally, The Saint opened his mouth and uttered a single word. "Buckwheats."

Silence. Finally Franchise sputtered "Buckwheats?" The Saint repeated, "Buckwheats."

It was silent for a moment as a look of horror fell over the face of every senior on the team.

"What's 'buckwheats?'" piped up Mike Connolly, confused. The guys shot him death stares. "Geez, never mind, eh?"

The rest of the guys got up to start their practice, not realizing the severity of the situation. The seniors and The Saint stayed seated, shell-shocked.

"Who are they sending?" asked Critical Nick. "Goal Czar Salazar? Brock the Rock?"

"He's dead," Easy Wind said.

"Oh yeah. So who is it?"

Still with his thousand-yard stare, The Saint replies "Mr. Shh." And with a collective intake of breath, all the seniors realize they are about to come face to face with their own mortality. Mr. Shh, whose real name is Rhett Rakhshani, is known for killing his opponents slowly, drawing penalties by falling on the ice if so much as the breeze from an opponent passes his way, then whining like a little baby until the Pioneers get a power play, which is where he takes his kill shot.

It's an epic battle, folks. Mr. Shh and the Pioneers vs. The Saint, Franchise Carroll, Critical Nick, Easy Wind Meyers, Pieces Greer and the rest of the seniors. Evil vs. Good. Boys vs. Men. Stupid Fat Creatures In Coonskin Caps vs. Bulldogs. And it's not going to be settled tonight, so stay tuned for this weekend.

Is anyone even going to understand this post?? It's not that obscure of a movie, is it??? Oh well. It's late. Just appreciate the genius.

Tougher in Alaska

Well, folks, I know that we've got our first WCHA series coming up next weekend. It's at UAA, where we often struggle. This is going to be a real test.

Now, I know I've said that this year is going to be different in so many ways. And I got advanced copy of some video that shows me just how serious our guys are about making this the best season we've had in years. They've been training all summer to get prepped for this series so we can start out 2-0 in the WCHA.

No one was more serious than tUMD's resident badass, Drew Akins.














This will give you an idea of some of the training measures Drew undertook in order to be prepared for what will be his breakout season.












Here, Drew is setting out to do what we call the Duluth Rodeo, which involves lassoing ships anchored off-shore and hauling them into port.




















Here he is preparing to gnaw through a telephone pole. This way if someone knocks off his helmet his teeth will be tough enough to chew through bone. I wish he'd wear more safety gear, though.














This is Drew's haul from the Duluth Rodeo. These boats were full of salmon and he ate it all.














After singlehandedly building and erecting this oil derrick, Drew has tapped an oil deposit rich enough to fuel the entire country until we can figure out how to wean ourselves off of petroleum products. He's about to do some pullups, or maybe bend some of the girders with his bare hands. I won't say which.

Not everything about this training exercise has been grunt work. Drew also honed his concentration and finishing skills by making this nice boat.













Here he is with Jordan Fulton testing out his new creation in the icy waters off the Alaskan coast.

Some of his teammates joined him on his quest to prove himself more efficient than a steam-powered drill. Drew Akins is a steel-drivin' man. I should mention that being on television adds 10 pounds, but in their case it was added exclusively to their heads. First person to guess correctly all 6 of the guys in the background gets a free beer of their choice at the Curling Club during the Wisconsin series in November.

Based on all the hard work Drew's been putting in, plus his new role on the power play and his general badass characteristics, I foresee great things this coming weekend. 4 points, boys!

Summer Nights

Okay, I know, I haven't written in a long time. 72 days, if you want a little precision. Which, let's face it, you don't, because it's not like you were wondering "Dang, when is she going to post again?"

Well, maybe one or two people were wondering. And they're not going to like this post anyway. So ha ha.

Things have occurred, like tUMD has a new coach, and Drew Olson was taken in the draft, and Carroll, Greer and Meyers were selected as the three captains of the 2009 NCAA Men's Ice Hockey Champions. You heard it here first. I also went to a game of the MN 4 on 4 Hockey League with MEg and was burned again (you may recall my first encounter with this sham of a league) by a lack of consistency between the online roster and the players present. We were, of course, looking for Casey Borer, MEg's ex-fiance. He's a member of the All-St. Cloud All-Night Competitive Eating team, but yet the only guy there we even remotely recognized was Brent Borgen, and who cares about him? There was another team playing, and they did have another notable player in Derrick LaPoint, but I don't really care about UND players other than Chris Porter. MEg had even brought a sign and we were going to reminisce with Casey about the old days. If the games weren't free to attend I'd definitely be contacting the BBB about this bait and switch operation. I'm never going back there again, even if they are trying to tempt me by setting up the Primerica team with FOUR current Bulldogs, a Bulldog alumnus, AND Ryan Carter. I'm sure they'll end up substituting in the Pee-Wee C Team from Brooklyn Center, and I'll have to wear a bullet-proof vest and pack heat.

What's INTERESTING and FABULOUS is this amazing new television show on Comcast Channel 120, otherwise known as SOAPNET. Just like General Hospital is an insight into what it's really like to work in a hospital, or The Young and the Restless is a snapshot of the lifestyle of a cosmetics executive, or Days of Our Lives showing us the day to day existence of the demonically possessed, MVP: He Shoots, She Scores is a gripping, true-to-life (I can only assume) serial drama about the lives and loves of professional hockey players. I think it's good for all of us to watch it so we can understand what happens to our superstars after they leave the college ranks and go pro. I'm wondering who from the WCHA was voted Most Likely to Stand Trial for Sexual Assault After Being Caught Videotaping His Sexual Encounter With a Girl He Had Previously Had a 3-way With While Being Haunted by the Ghost of the Wife and Daughter He Killed in a Car Wreck When He Was Driving High on Cocaine? Maybe Bickel? Or perhaps Brock Trotter? And which player is going to leave his weird trailer-park crimped-hair girlfriend and her senile grandmother back in Canada to pose in his underwear for some photo shoot and do ballet with the possibly underage daughter of the team's now-dead captain in her home which he bought and moved into while her mother works at a convenience store and sells weird apple juice smoothie drinks with her dead husband's hockey card on them? The smart money is on Wheeler there. And either Gabe Guentzel or Tony Lucia could end up as the sex maniac attempting to reform himself so he can sleep with a virgin preschool teacher while testifying that he was the guest star in the aforementioned 3-way and trying to fill the skates of the dead captain while preventing his dad/head coach from falling off the wagon (hint: it's too late!) and preventing the slutty reporter from finding out AND from getting into bed with him.

After that scintillating plot recap, I expect you all to be watching. Thursday nights at 10 p.m. central time.

0-fer? No, Sir!

Ugh. I kind of hate that post title, but I'm going with it anyway.

The disgusting fact is, this is our first win against a team from the state of Minnesota.

BUT WHO CARES?????????????? WE WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Who cares if Kronick scored a goal?? It was the ONLY GOAL!
Who cares if we're in 9th place?? We didn't care last year! (Well, we cared, but it didn't stop us from beating Denver!)
Who cares if St. Cloud fans left in droves after Meyers scored on the PP? I'm sure tUMD fans stayed til the end!

I listened to the game tonight with UMDDogz, The Alleged Webmaster, and DA, while flipping between the HS hockey tournament and the Gophers-Seawolves game, while monitoring the Wild game through GameTracker. It was sort of a lot of hockey. You might say.

Ummm... I don't even know what to say, I'm so excited! Yay! Let's get out there and SWEEP!

Important other news: 7 Bulldogs were named to the WCHA All-Academic Team.
Andrew Carroll
Jason Garrison*
Michael Gergen*
Matt Greer
Matt Niskanen*
Mason Raymond
MacGregor Sharp

*denotes one of My Guys

Numbers
Playoff Wins Until We Surpass Last Year's Total: DONE!

My "Guys" Competition:
Matt Niskanen: 30
Michael Gergen: 16
Mike Curry: 14
Matt McKnight: 8
Jason Garrison: 2

Freshmen Competition:
Akins: 10
Fulton: 9
Stalock: 4
Gorsalitz: 2
Palm: 1
C. Ryan: 1
(Ahem, freshmen!)

On Notice:
Drew Akins: GD 19 PD 8
Trent Palm: GD 26 PD 26
Ryan Geris: GD 36 PD 7
Travis Gawryletz: GD 37 PD 4
Matt Greer: GD 14 PD 14
Jeff McFarland: GD 13 PD 13
Jay Cascalenda: GD 13 PD 13
Michael Gergen: GD 10 PD 6
Jordan Fulton: GD 9
MacGregor Sharp: GD 4
Andrew Carroll: GD 6 PD 6

They Call It A Streak

A winning streak! Hooray!

RWD Ace reporter and prognosticator DA checks in with the following report on the game (since I had to work):

What, the first stick salute in how long? I think I used to have hair (well not that bad but it's been a while). [RWD finds this very hard to believe, as DA has not had hair since the '70s.]

First time since 2004 for a [conference] sweep, and it had been since Nov of 2004 that they won a game when trailing after two. [There was some serious grammar editing just now, and it's still a messed-up sentence fragment.] 42 games.

The scoring started early with Sharp from Gergen and Kemp at 1:06, good goal. Tech took over for a while and then finally tied it at 7:38 after the 'Dogs had killed back to back penalties. UMD used a five on three to get back in the lead but scored one second after the first penalty expired. McKnight from Niskanen and Raymond.

Kinrade tied it again on a defensive breakdown when Rouleau worked the puck past two defenders and fed the puck to Kinrade for a goal. End of one.

McGregor missed a breakaway shorthanded attempt [Aw, man! But I sure am glad THAT GUY is on our PK!] and that was followed by a goal later in the period by Batovanja at 16:45. A fight later led to a PP but they [Tech] failed to convert. End of two with Tech leading 3-2.

After a big post was hit by Geris, Sharp from Gergen and Kemp at 3:00 minutes tied the
game. A few penalties back and forth and then at 12:10 Raymond put away a great goal from a feed by McGregor and McKnight.

The scoring finished with Greer putting it in the open net from a pass from Stalock [with an assist to Josh Meyers as well, welcome back!] that tipped off Shepherd. (19:38).

What a series win over a team that, no matter how poor they are playing, usually comes into Duluth and sweeps the 'Dogs just when you think they have a chance to move up in the
standings. Maybe this year will be different. Look for a big second half.

And from the Canadian world, hockey savant and honorary RWD correspondent The Crazy Canuck gives us the inside scoop on no-longer-snake-bitten Mason Raymond:

Just to give you some history here bulldog fans, Mason Raymond has been a nemesis of goaltender Robbie Nolan for a couple of seasons. His biggest goal against this Mich Tech product was when Rob Nolan played for the Fort McMurray Oil Barons and Raymond played for the Kodiaks. The year: 2005. The series: bragging rights for the Alberta Junior Hockey League Championship. The Kods were down in this series 3 games to 1. Came back to get the second win at home. Then went into Fort McMurray in hopes of staving off elimination for the second straight game. The score: 2-0 Barons with 6 minutes to go. Kods get one. Kods get the tying goal with 35 seconds left in the game. And then in OT, Magic Man Mason does his best dipsy doodle and out maneouvers Nolan to put the biscuit in the basket. The Kods never looked back and defeated the Barons in game 7 back on home ice.

So, we've got a winning streak, we've got our top scorers with multiple points on the night, a PK that was perfect this weekend, and fans who won't stop believin'! We are ready for a second half run! (Also, there is a house party at tBeersong's, if you're interested.)

Numbers
Points Until We Surpass Last Year's Total: 16 (SWEEP! GLORIOUS SWEEP!)
Wins Until We Surpass Last Year's Total: 7 (HOORAY!)

My "Guys" Competition:
Matt Niskanen: 22!
Michael Gergen: 11! (Overtakes Mike Curry!)
Mike Curry: 10
Matt McKnight: 5!
Jason Garrison: 2 (We miss you!)

Freshmen Competition:
Akins: 9
Fulton: 7
Stalock: 4! (Assisted on the ENG at the end!)
Gorsalitz: 2
Palm: 1
C. Ryan: 1

The Gauntlet: Killing The Radio Star Edition

This week, The Gauntlet returns with a vengeance...

Okay, maybe not a vengeance, since this is another "Friendly Fire" incident. This week, RWD threw down the glove to Bruce Ciskie, UMD Radio Guy, former USCHO Poster, and Purse Snatcher.

RWD: Hold on, must find notebook with questions.

Ciskie: Uh oh... you wrote them down?

RWD: Weeks ago.

Ciskie: I'm marginally impressed.

RWD: Seriously, what do you take me for? What about my blog would ever make you think I am anything other than a serious journalist with the highest standards of integrity?

Ciskie: I'll be more impressed after I find out what the questions are.

RWD: I think my questions will be better than "What's in your iPod?" I already know it's country. Did you have a nice christmas?

Ciskie: Absolutely. I can never complain about a new PS2 game and seeing my kid happily ripping open his mom's presents because he apparently didn't get enough of his own. [Bruce won't be winning Father Of The Year any time soon.]

RWD: I was going to ask if there was a Mrs. Bruce Ciskie, but you've already answered that.

Ciskie: Yeah, there is, and she's really the one who jump-started my hockey obsession. I was only a casual fan until our second date, which happened to be the 1998 UMD-[UMTC] playoff game that everyone SWEARS they were at. I was, and I now own a DVD of it thanks to some really nice UMD fan in the Twin Cities.

RWD: Do you know that the only people who have answered yes to the "is there a Mr/Mrs [your name here]" question are UMD fans?

Ciskie: Really?

RWD: Really. So you have been following tDogs since 1998? Or before?

Ciskie: Slightly before. I had gone to a few games before that 1998 playoff game, but it wasn't enough to hook me. We went to the Saturday game of the playoff series, and I have a vague memory of a fight or some sort of skirmish happening late in the game (a Gopher shutout win). No matter what it was, it was enough for me to make it clear that we were going to the Sunday night game. After that, I was hooked on college hockey. I also remember listening to the 1984 title game with Bowling Green on the radio, even though I was supposed to be sleeping. I didn't know anything about hockey at the time, but I knew it was a big deal so I listened (BANDWAGON!). I turned it off before the fourth overtime because I couldn't stay awake anymore (I was six at the time).

RWD: I suppose the players make you feel really old.

Ciskie: All of them except Geris.

RWD: "So, Jordan Fulton, how was your senior year of high school... LAST YEAR?"

Ciskie: Well, there's that. I don't really think about the age gap with the guys that much, though there will sometimes be conversations where I come away feeling old.

RWD: Mentally I'm sure there's no age gap.

Ciskie: Actually, they're probably older than I am in that regard.

RWD: Let's talk about the players. Who's the hottest Bulldog?

Ciskie: Can I cheat on this one?

RWD: NO! No one's WIFE! No CHEERLEADERS!

Ciskie: I don't think any of the players are married, so I can apparently choose a girlfriend.

RWD: NO! [extremely long pause] For crying out loud! This is taking too long!

Ciskie: You're asking a guy who the hottest Bulldog is... really, did you expect a quick response?

RWD: [After another extremely long pause, when it becomes evident that Bruce is using a lifeline.] Have you decided who is the hottest?

Ciskie: Mrs. Ciskie says if she had to pick she'd pick Sharp or Gawryletz.

RWD: But Bruce, I know you've seen them shirtless! Who has the best body? Maybe some of them are butterfaces.

Ciskie: I think you're misunderstanding the nature of my job. I don't need to interview them in the shower.

RWD: You don't need to.

Ciskie: Nor do I want to.

RWD: I'm torn between editing this out because I look like a jersey chaser, and leaving it in, because it is so funny.

Ciskie: I do know enough about sports to know that the goalies are typically the best athletes on the team, so if you're looking for the best body, you should probably start there. [Translation: Ciskie wants Stalock.]

RWD: What is Judd like? Is he dreamy?

Ciskie: You mean Medak or Hirsch? I'm sure his wife finds him very attractive and that's all that matters. He's a great guy, very knowledgeable about hockey, and the best part about him is that he's not afraid to be critical when conditions warrant. Some color guys are afraid to say anything that could be construed as critical of the home team.

RWD: I know that you're very restrained in that area, especially about the refs.

Ciskie: I'm always nice to the officials.

RWD: We'll return to that.

Ciskie: I'm sure we will.

RWD: Why doesn't Judd go on the road with you?

Ciskie: It was something we had put in place probably 10 years ago. I've never really asked anyone about it, but it seems to me that it really wasn't financially smart to have a second person go on the road for these longer trips especially.

RWD: Don't you get bored?

Ciskie: I had about five years of experience doing high school hockey games before I got the UMD job, and almost every game I did was by myself. In all honesty, I don't think much about it unless the game is REALLY bad. The weird thing is that I can flip the switch when we go home. I don't make Judd sit there for a half hour not able to say anything because I won't shut up.

RWD: What happened to Fan in the Stands? I wanted to win a pizza from the Lakeview Castle

Ciskie: There really wasn't much demand for it, so we decided to use that time in the pregame to actually talk about hockey. It wasn't easy to drop it, but I didn't want to put a cap on everything else we do in the pregame (I think it's more important to not have to cut Sandelin off).

RWD: I thought it was between periods.

Ciskie: It was, but without doing it in the pregame, it was asking a lot to have someone come down to the rink just for that purpose. If we had a three-man booth, we could just send that third person downstairs for that.

RWD: So you have a new feature instead: Email the Booth. Does anyone other than me use it?

Ciskie: Not as much as I had hoped. It was something that a few Twin Cities fans had asked me to do, and when I was going over feedback and trying to figure out what we could add to the broadcasts for 06-07, I decided it was something we could do. The response hasn't met the prior demand. It also stinks that I don't have a laptop and we can only do it for home games.

RWD: I've been trying to help you out, but it's hard to think of questions.

Ciskie: And I appreciate that. Just make random comments about what Judd and I are saying. It's all about interaction. It doesn't have to be anything perceptive about the game itself.

RWD: I'm surprised more people don't. There are plenty of people listening.

Ciskie: I am, too. I know.

RWD: I should ask a dumb question...

Ciskie: Go ahead.

RWD: ...to make people feel better.

Ciskie: No such thing as a dumb question.

RWD: No, I mean on the air.

Ciskie: Oh.

RWD: Not now. Then people will be like, okay, yeah, I don't have to be brilliant. Speaking of questions: the coach's show. Why can't I get it on the radio?

Ciskie: Because some idiot isn't turning on the internet switch.

RWD: I want to listen tomorrow. Are you going to ask about Mike Dorr?

Ciskie: You know we can't talk about recruits.

RWD: At all?

Ciskie: Not until they sign.

RWD: Lame.

Ciskie: If I asked a question about Mike Dorr right now, I'd get a mystified stare and some sort of physical signal that it's time to move on to a different topic.

RWD: At least you can get on USCHO and tPB and read about it. Speaking of USCHO, what do you say to rumors that you stole an old lady's purse and ran into a gay bar?

Ciskie: There could be some exaggerations there.

RWD: The lady may have been younger than originally thought. The best post on that thread was "Judd? Is that you?"

Ciskie: The alarm went off in my head when that thread went up. I knew it was time to disappear.

RWD: Is it hard to go from being a fan to being more professional?

Ciskie: I don't care if people talk about me, but the only other D1 announcer who has gotten his own thread is Doug Woog, and I'm so far away from his league that it's not even funny. It's tough. I still enjoy hanging around in the Cafe because there are actually people there that I have met and gotten to know a little bit. But it turned into a no-brainer to get away from the D1 board and stop getting sucked into dumb conversations that I don't need to get sucked into anymore. [Which is essentially the entire experience at USCHO.] About the toughest thing with this job is shedding the emotions of being a fan, because those never truly go away. I want UMD to win every game, and I want nothing but the best for this group of kids because they are such good kids, but I have to set at least a chunk of those feelings aside on game nights. I was proud of myself on Saturday for staying away from the officials until they called that major on Sharp.

RWD: How many Christmas cards did you receive from officials this year?

Ciskie: Brett Klosowski still talks to me. In fact, he's the saintly one who explained the attainable pass rule to me. Of course, I had to think about it for a month before I understood it.

RWD: I'll take that as "zero."

Ciskie: Same number as what I sent out to them. But in all seriousness, I like brett and I'm glad he's in our league now. It's a tough job, and frankly i'm not sure there are a ton of great officials in college hockey right now. I think the problem, if there is one, really only has one fully effective solution: full time officials, and it's just not feasible for these leagues or the NCAA in general to do something like that. Until someone finds the money to make a full time officials system more economical, we have to live with what we have, which is an imperfect system run by humans. [Bruce clearly wants this world to be run by DAMN DIRTY APES!]

RWD: I see you spend a lot of time thinking about this.

Ciskie: When you're driving by yourself to and from some of the stops in the WCHA, you think about a lot of stuff.

RWD: That makes you sound like you're headed for the padded cell.

Ciskie: Wouldn't surprise me. I think there's a special wing there for radio people, and I've spent more than 10 years in radio.

RWD: What is the best road trip you've been on?

Ciskie: Best road trip? Colorado Springs last year or Florida. I can't pick. The TV guys and I took a drive up Pike's Peak on the Saturday of the Colorado trip, and then we won that weird game where CC outshot us like 274-9 but Isaac stood on his head. Florida was cool because I got to hang out with my old buddy Chris Long and I walked into the Gulf of Mexico and called my wife in her office. Alaska is a trip that every fan should try to make at least once.

RWD: Alaska would be fun. I could meet Donald. Armageddon would probably come.

Ciskie: I've not met Donald. Donald knows where I sit at the Sullivan, and I'm deeply offended that he's never popped over to say hello. Sully isn't like some places where they have an actual press box. Fans walk behind me and around me to get to their seats, so I can be talked to by any random fan who wants to strike up a conversation.

RWD: I could hear you on the UAA video webcast.

Ciskie: I heard about that. Last year, Justin May swore he could hear me on the other side of the arena (the video guy sits across the rink from where the radio guys are).

RWD: Isn't Justin May the strength and conditioning coach?

Ciskie: Yeah, but he handled the video stuff last year.

RWD: Wow, a renaissance man. What's the best game you've called so far?

Ciskie: You mean quality of the game or quality of the broadcast?

RWD: Your favorite moment in Bulldog broadcasting history.

Ciskie: Probably McKnight's game winner in Mankato last year. It was a sweet goal because 1) it took about an hour to trickle across the goal line, and 2) I had no idea who was camped out in front of the net, so I just said "IT'S IN THE NET, AND THE DOGS WIN IT!"

RWD: I thought "AND HERE COME THE TEDDY BEARS" was possibly the greatest thing you've ever said. It sounded like we were being invaded.

Ciskie: That one's up there, too. McFarland's first goal was fun, too.

RWD: Well, not his first.

Ciskie: Well, the first one I got to call.

RWD: The first one that wasn't NOT COUNTED or RECREDITED.

Ciskie: Right. Though, it's worth noting that from a "quality of the goal call" standpoint, the one they stole from him in St. Cloud last year was much better.

RWD: When are you interviewing Mike Curry?

Ciskie: Already did.

RWD: WHAT? WHEN?

Ciskie: I think it was during the Tech series.

RWD: Because he scores a lot in Michigan, right. AND I MISSED IT!

Ciskie: Yeah and he had been playing really well the last couple weekends before that trip, so it seemed like an easy decision.

RWD: He is still playing really well.

Ciskie: Yeah, he's really stepped it up. That whole line has. You know the McFarland story and Greer has a career high for goals already.

RWD: People mocked me last year, they were like "How can you like him? All he does is take penalties." But now he is doing well, and staying mostly out of the box.

Ciskie: Curry is a force when he uses his reach. He's not the quickest cat on the ice, but he is physical and he has longer arms than Yao Ming.

RWD: He needs to meet Mark Parrish and learn from the master. They could be the same type of player.

Ciskie: Yeah, I can see that. Mark Parrish is cool.

RWD: Camp out in front of the net in his "office" as those TV dorks say.

Ciskie: I HATE that. It started with Gretzky behind the net.

RWD: Well, we are incapable of going to the net hard, it seems, so someone has to be there when we take an annoying shot from far away. Who are your favorite Bulldogs? Current and All-Time?

Ciskie: Current: all of them. All time: [Brett] Hull, [Bill] Watson, [Lucien] Lessard, [Derek] Plante, [Judd] Medak [obvs sucking up to Judd here], [Beau] Geisler, [The Alaskan Assassin] Todd Smith, and Steve Rodberg makes honorable mention for that fight with Erik Jensen of Wisconsin. Frankly, I do like pretty much all of [the current players], it's about as good a group of kids as anyone could ask to hang around.

RWD: I like them all too, but I have my guys, of course. I'm visiting Duluth for the Northern series, and bringing some random people with me. What would you suggest visiting fans do in Duluth?

Ciskie: The aquarium is cool if it's too cold to walk around the zoo.

RWD: The zoo? We are all adults.

Ciskie: It's winter in Duluth, so unless you want to walk them around the mall there isn't much.

RWD: It's winter in Duluth??? GASP!

Ciskie: Take them skiing or something.

RWD: What about eating?

Ciskie: Old Chicago, Timberlodge, Ground Round, Grandma's, Big Daddy's. (Aren't you going to ask me what's in my IPod? )

RWD: COUNTRY! How about a weekend prediction for us?

Ciskie: 4-2, 4-3.

RWD: Mike Curry hat trick?

Ciskie: no, but he'll have another four-point weekend, and UMD will get their first two-game sweep since, um, i don't know when. I yearn for not having to watch visiting team fans celebrating a sweep in the DECC, so this weekend will be fun.

RWD: Especially with your nemesis in attendance. She already saw them sweep at UND. She is overconfident.

Ciskie: I have no nemesis... she is also like four feet tall, so I hope she brings her high chair so she can watch the games.

RWD: Any New Year's resolutions?

Ciskie: I don't want to be fat anymore. I want to continue trying to be less mean to the officials. I want to keep getting better at my job.

RWD: It's radio, no one has to know...

Ciskie: Yeah, but airplane seats aren't comfortable when you are 6'4 and [come on, Bruce, no one really wants to know how much you weigh].

RWD: Ask Justin May for tips, if he isn't too busy de-worming orphans and solving a Rubik's Cube with his feet.

Ciskie: Justin could probably kill me if I ever worked out with him.

RWD: Or by just looking at you wrong. Is he hot?

Ciskie: Mrs. Ciskie is unavailable for comment. She's on a conference call for work.

Well, there you have it. The first The Gauntlet of 2007, albeit a lite version.