Like Lambs to Slaughter

tUMD 5, Bad News Huskies 0
tUMD 3, Bad News Huskies 0

Everyone all thawed out after the chilly weekend? It's 15 degrees (in Minneapolis, in Duluth it's 21), I'm wearing shorts!

I know this is going to blow your mind, by Friday I went out with friends instead of listening to the game. I know! I can't even believe it either! I have friends! What? And my whole life doesn't revolve around Bulldog hockey! I'm as surprised as you are. I thought I'd break out in hives.

Saturday I wasn't really paying attention either, because I was over at MEg's house helping her paint and helping assuage her grief over the impending loss of Jamie Russell. This upsets me as well, as it's well-documented how I feel about Le Russell.

So finally! Finally tUMD gets 8 points from Michigan Tech! That has not happened since before College Hockey Stats has data! That really sucks!

The PP still needs work. Discussion over on tPB tends to favor abandoning the four forwards approach. As did the overall sentiment in AA (I can't write the arena name anymore, not because I have a problem with it but because I am getting spammed like scrazy* with "questions" about my "involvment" with a certain synthetic oil) when we played Wisconsin. Also on the list, not waiting forever to shoot it into the opponent's legs. Just do it right away.

Also, my link for the Hobey Baker vote is jacked up, and I've been too lazy to change it, but here's the correct one. UND's Lawn Mower Tossing Champion is in the lead right now, thanks to some Maple Leafs fans who ran out of waffles to throw. I've been voting pretty much daily just because I can, but all of our guys are sitting with less than 1% of the vote. Good thing the fan vote counts for 1% of the total voting process. Theoretically.

You can also vote for an award a Bulldog player is guaranteed to win: the Stauber Brothers Fan Favorite award. Past winners are My Jacky, Stalock and Garrison.

I already have another idea for a post! I'm hoping this is the end of my posting doldrums!


*Scrazy is a new word Dirty made up last night. Definition pending.

Duck Tales

Everybody sing! "Duck Tales, A-WOO-HOO!"

This afternoon, Jimmy Bellamy from the Duluth News Tribune hosted a live chat with Rob Bordson, our favorite rags-to-riches (relatively speaking, I mean he did go to Marshall) Bulldog-turned-Duck. Since it wasn't my chat, I'm not going to provide a transcript, but I will give some of the highlights (with my own commentary, of course.)

"Dawn": Which former teammate are you most looking forward to playing against?

Rob: I am looking forward to playing against Jason Garrison and Evan Oberg. I played at UMD with those guys [yes, we know] and I got to know them pretty well when we played together.

Jimmy: Who on the Ducks did you get to know the most in your short time with Anaheim this year?

Rob: I got to know Dan Sexton pretty well. [Dan Sexton is my enemy because he prevents MacGregor Sharp from playing in the NHL.] We were both staying at the hotel together as we were both rookies. He is also from Minnesota and played high school at Apple Valley. He was a very nice guy and I learned a lot from him about how everything works and what it's like to play in the NHL. [Still my enemy.]

RWD: [That's me! Holy smokes!] Hey Rob! Congratulations on a great year with the Bulldogs and your pro contract! [I'm nice.] There's a lot of talk [on USCHO, where losers matriculate en masse] about college vs. major juniors as the right route to the NHL. Do you think that the Ducks' organization respects the college game or are they biased toward MJs? [I asked a question! I didn't chicken out! Like I always do at the Coaches' Show. Except when I won a sweatshirt and screamed.]

Rob: That's a good statement. [Which one?] I think both college and major juniors is [sic] great hockey. A lot of good players come from both leagues. The Ducks definitely respect the college players because they have a history of signing college free agents. Guys like Dustin Penner [Maine], Andy MacDonald [Colgate] [Wait, what???] and Chris Kunitz [Ferris State]. I think a lot of teams are starting to look at the college players as much as major junior players.

RWD: Don't forget MacGregor Sharp... :) [!!!]

Rob: I will actually probably be on the same team as MacGregor. I am very excited. [Me too.]

Jimmy: Have you had a chance to check out the almost-completed Amsoil Arena yet?

"Jamie": Are you disappointed you won't get to play in the new arena?

Rob: I have not seen the new rink since our team took a tour during the year. I am a little disappointed I won't get to play in it, but it was one of the things I had to give up to sign pro. [Also given up: a 2011 NCAA Men's Ice Hockey Champions ring.]

Bruce C.: [A CLEVER DISGUISE!!! Why not B. Ciskie?? Oops, gave it away.] How cool would it be to get to play on Sharpie's line, since you didn't do that much -- if at all -- at UMD? Oh, and did you get to meet the Ducks radio guy? Is he nearly as cool as I am (probably not)? [Good lord. And we were worried I would be the one to make an ass of myself.]

Rob: I would definitely like to play with Sharpie. He is a great player and since we didn't get to play together at UMD I think it would be a lot of fun. And no, I didn't get a chance to meet the radio guys yet. Haha.

Jimmy: No one tops you, Bruce. Ciskie is Spanish for "cool." [THAT'S NOT TRUE, JIMMY! YOU LIAR!!!] Did it take you a second to get over the fact that you were sharing a locker room in practice with Teemu Selanne and the now-retired Scott Niedermayer?

Rob: Yeah, I was in shock for a few days before I actually realized who I was skating with. It was pretty unbelievable to skate with those guys after watching them for years. It is unreal how much skill they have and how well they know the game.

RWD: [I'm monopolizing this chat.] Who are you working out with this summer? [RESTRAINING ORDER ALERT!] You're in Duluth now, right?

Rob: Yes, I am in Duluth for the summer. I am working out with the UMD strength coach Justin May. It is a good place to workout because there are a few current Bulldogs there and some other guys around the area that play Division 1 elsewhere around the country or juniors. It's a good workout. [Men Made By May! Isn't that sexist? Your wife should totally have Chicks Created by Christyn.]

Jimmy: When does training camp begin? Do you have to report earlier than vets?

Rob: I actually have to report next Monday for rookie camp. That will be for a week. And the main training camp begins in September. I am not sure if the veterans will be there right away.

Jimmy: You came from the WCHA, which is arguably [though I don't know why people even bother to argue, it's true] the best conference in college hockey. How much of a speed difference is there in the pro game from what you saw this year?

Rob: It is a bit of a difference. The players are faster and stronger and the puck moves very fast. Everyone is a good passer so the puck zips around pretty good. I felt I could keep up pretty good when I practiced with the team.

[Celebrity guest alert! I mean, other than me. And "Bruce C."]
Sean Avery: What is your take on enforcers? Do you think you could have the mindset to be one in the NHL or have ever taken on that role at any level?

Rob: I think every team needs enforcers. You have to have skilled players and role players to make up a good team. I don't think I will play the role as an enforcer because Anaheim sees me as a skilled forward, but I will definitely learn to play tougher at the pro level.

Bruce C: How ready are you for a gig in the AHL, Rob? Do you think you'll fit in there right away?

Rob: It will definitely be an adjustment. But I think I will learn how to play at the pro level. It might take a few months, but I hope to pick it up fast.

"Tom": Hey, Rob. It's no secret that the Ducks have a lot of great veteran players on their roster. Is there anyone in particular that you're really excited to play alongside?

Rob: Anaheim has a great group of veterans. They have guys that have won the Stanley Cup and medals at the Olympic Games. I think if I made the team I would enjoy every day. It was pretty awesome skating with Teemu Selanne during practice.

RWD: [Yes!!!] Rob, you helped win me 2nd place in my WCHA fantasy hockey league, so thank you. What are some of your personal highlights from last season or your college career?

Rob: Haha. Well, I had a rough couple years to start out my college career, but last year was full of memories. I had a couple 4 point games that were pretty awesome. I think the sweep down in Minnesota [UMTC] was awesome. It is always nice to beat the Gophers and we beat them twice in their barn. As a team that was one of our better weekends. [It was also one of my better weekends for being a total hag to opposing fans.] It was also fun beating CC in the playoffs to get to the Final 5.

Bruce Ciskie: [Whoa, wait! Was that Bruce C. another person??] How about your boy Alex Stalock maybe getting a shot in San Jose this year? [Well if that NNIITTYYMMAAKKII person doesn't get it] Even if he doesn't, how cool is it going to be to face him in the AHL or NHL? [Uh, well, if he doesn't get a shot, then he won't be in the NHL, Bruce.]

Rob: Yeah, Al has a great chance at playing in San Jose. I think the GM of San Jose said it was pretty much wide open. I think Al has a great shot as he played well all year and tied an AHL record for wins as a goalie. It would definitely be fun to play him again.

Bruce C: [See!!! What is going on here???] Where do you shoot on him?

Rob: That's a tough call. He is good all over. He is quick down low so maybe up high.

Jimmy Bellamy: Do you know much about the incoming freshmen at UMD? How do you think the 'Dogs will fare this season?

Rob Bordson: I think UMD will have a good year. [WE DO NOT WANT A "GOOD" YEAR. WE WANT A FANTASTICAL YEAR!] I think they have some good recruits coming in. I know Faulk will be good as he was just drafted in the 2nd round. [Er, yes, that is correct, second round draft picks are always... oh right.]

Fffff. I prepared a question LAST WEEK, I was going to ask if he had experienced any rookie hazing, but I FORGOT. Ugh. Swear words.

Golden

It's my birthday, bitches!! And I'll swear if I want to!!! I'm 27 on October 27th!!!! Wow!!!

I've never been one of those people who passive-aggressively keeps their birthday a secret until 11:59:59 PM and then rages at everyone for forgetting. I have enough things to rage about, thank you. The more people know, the happier the day is! I am already having a great birthday. I got a fabulous email from one of my best friends from college, and a box waiting on the front step when I got home that came from my mom and sounds as though it is broken, and a birthday card from my grandparents addressed to the wrong name, as usual!

The last time I celebrated my birthday with any sort of celebration was... oh, wait, nm, I mean the SECOND TO LAST time, whoops, Grandma's gettin' old... ok, it was my 21st, the last I spent in Illinois. It wasn't a birthday... it was like, a birthCARNIVAL! The Brazilian kind! It lasted for days! I think there was Fighting Illini football (meaning Fighting Illini losing), and DEFINITELY Fighting Illini HOCKEY with pregaming at my favorite bar followed by the game (I had season tickets, which were $40 TOTAL!) and extreme harrassment of the visiting team and then more bar. And then on MY actual birthday... oh, a fluid mechanics test. It was a Monday. Things happen.

But that was the start of Birthday Hockey. Let's discuss the birthday hockey record!

2003: Illinois 4, Eastern Michigan 2
2004: tUMD 4, Mankato State 1, things happened
2005: tUMD 6, Tech 3, CURRY SCORES 2 GOALS IN 30 SECONDS!!!!!!!!!!!
2006: tUMD 2, DU 1, Garrison gets the GWG in OT!
2007: tUMD 4, DU 0, Sharp and Bordson have goals!
2008: tUMD 5, SCCC 1, Jacky and Sharp have 2 assists each, Drew Akins gets a goal!!!

Guys. We have to talk. Especially you, David Grun. Guys who wear 27 (Peluso, Curry) have gotten goals for me on my birthday. You must carry on the tradition. But a win is most important. I will not be at the game, which is causing me to hyperventilate (I AM NOT GOING TO SEE A GAME LIVE FOR LIKE THREE FRIGGIN WEEKS), so you guys have to help me. Just... play really really well. And take a commanding lead and never let up. BE RELENTLESS. Please do not make me worry about this game. I have enough stress!!! I KNOW you can do this. Look at the awesome record you've compiled over the last five years. And some of those teams were, like, TERRIBLE. And they STILL pulled out birthday wins for me.

It's Tuesday, four weeks into the season, and I'm already begging. Sigh.

MC's Back!

EXCITING NEWS, PEOPLE!!!!!!

I know that I rarely post about former Bulldogs, but eeeeeeeeeeeee! Mike Curry scored his first professional goal as part of a Jean-Phillippe Lamoureaux sieve-out in Mormon Country on Friday.















Here is what the Aces' press release says:

Aces rookie Mike Curry, raised in Eagle River, Alaska, scored on a rebound in his pro debut with 6:49 remaining, but James Sanford answered with a goal off the rush three minutes later to complete the scoring.

James Sanford can go jump in a frozen lake. He is inconsequential here, though. Great job, Mike!!! Keep up the scoring flurry!

Jason Garrison also made his NHL debut last night. We definitely miss him on the blueline this year, but considering he's already been called up by his team, I'm happy for him and understand that his decision was the right one for him.

teltnuaG ehT

Donald attempted to Gauntlet me. He did not succeed. Here are the results. Now step aside and let Mama take over.

(Extremely long wait for Donald to get to his computer)
DTP: Ok ... so should we get this over with? [Well, I waited around for forever, so could we please get on with it?]

RWD: Are you sure you're ready?

DTP: 1st question: Why do you hate Mike Connolly?

RWD: Aww, I don't hate Fuzzy. I'm pro Fuzzy. Some big bad Bronco player threw him into the boards last weekend and I about cut someone, but the REF called a PENALTY and I almost died. [Maybe the system works!]

DTP: Mike senses your overwhelming love for Jack and he isn't amused.

RWD: Oh really? Did your Spidey sense tell you that?

DTP: I'm uncharacteristically intuitive about such things

RWD: I think he's probably happy I'm not a freak over him. He sleeps better at night I'm sure. [Meanwhile, I’m sure Jack is terrified. And rightfully so. I am crazy.]

DTP: Do you agree with Hannes Alfven that in a Universe filled with Plasma that electric currents are pervasive? [Do you agree that no one other than possibly MEg is going to understand that question?]

RWD: I failed my plasma engineering course. The professor was a jackass though. [To him, “short quiz” was actually “horrendously long test.” Didn’t get THAT memo.]

DTP: Are you more or less intellectually curious than Sarah Palin?

RWD: I am a McCain supporter and will not participate in anything that mocks her, though Amy Poehler's rap was amazing.

DTP: Will Sandy give Kenny Reiter a start this weekend?

RWD: I don't know. I don't even know if Kenny is there. I am attempting to find out. Bruce is being reticent. He threatened my life. [He did finally respond but only with information that was either self-evident or irrelevant. Then later his blog had useful information. No.]

DTP: I'll handle Bruce this weekend. Was he pouty cos [stupid foreigner spelling] I didn't show up and say hi last year? [We did not go to Anchorage last year. Maybe he was upset because he donated money to your stupid Final Five fund.]

RWD: Bruce is pouty because I send him barrages of text messages about stupid stuff. [Mom and Dad cover your eyes] While I am driving.

DTP: Did it snow there yet?

RWD: No. But every customer that I talk to that finds out I am in Minnesota asks me that. Or about the Mall of America. [Or they tell me I should be in prison, that I am a criminal, that I don't want to help them, or they just say "Listen young lady..."]

DTP: Be happy that they know Minnesota is a state

RWD: It is THE state. Of hockey.

DTP: Is Sandelin's job on the line this year?

RWD: Yes. There is major talent on this team and if we don't finish better then there's no way I can defend him anymore. I will most likely usurp him.

DTP: What will tUMD fans consider "better"?

RWD: Home ice for the playoffs.

DTP: Coke or Pepsi?

RWD: Coke, definitely coke. And also Coca-Cola.

DTP: Rant on to your own satisfaction about USCHO... [meaning Ugly Stupid Crack Heads Online]

RWD: I don't really mention "that site" on my blog as I don't want to give them any undue publicity. It does give me a nice ego boost; it reminds me of how intelligent I am. It is a fruit roll-up of vulgarity, depravity, and the worst elements of the human psyche. It's like shower shoes covered in mold. I generally go on there only to offend.

DTP: As did I once upon a time

RWD: I can't say I ever read one of your posts but I know I'm much more reserved than you are. I usually forget what posts I've started things in.

DTP: Will the LHC create a black hole?

RWD: St. Cloud State will. With all the negative pressure (vacuums don't suck, people!) coming out of there.

DTP: Compare the Bulldogs defense this year to last years blueliners

RWD: They are... um... Kind of the same? Palm is still Palm. Cascalenda is still Cascalenda. Oberg is back and scoring us goals.

DTP: Garrison is gonzo. [Eeeeeee!]

RWD: Yes but I can't compare Garrison to noGarrison. Mike Montgomery has joined the blueline and is a big kid who knows how to play the offensive side of the game as well. Our penalty kill is not as strong.

DTP: What about Josh Meyers?

RWD: Josh is Josh. He is supposed to be another offensive defenceman but I just can't figure him out. He does score points. I don't know how I feel about him on the PP. I know that Scotty Kishel is going to be a great PP guy in the coming years. He is kind of in and out of the lineup.

DTP: Did you guys get whistled for boatloads of penalties so far?

RWD: Yes. But we always do. I think that we were spoiled last year with an outstanding PK.

DTP: Special Teams looks to be THE "theme" this year.

RWD: I think coaches say that every year. They are always a key element of the game and no team is very successful without good special teams. I think the big problem is if there are more penalties on both sides that more guys need to be ready to fill those roles. Many guys play on both the PP and the PK and we really don't want to kill them.

DTP: The extra-emphasis this year on stick-related offenses is an adjustment all the players will have to make.

RWD: Those Canadians sure were confused during the exhibition games. "Thaaaat's a penalty, eh?"

DTP: What would be more fun --- me coming to Final Five ... or you coming to Anchorage for a series?

RWD: You coming to the Final Five. The Final Five is Holy Week, Donald. I will at some point come to Anchorage I am sure, but the Final Five is so awesome.

DTP: I meant more fun from your perspective.

RWD: That is my perspective.

DTP: I have no doubt I'd have more fun at the Final Five than I would chauffering you around Anchorage. [Like I would get into a car with Donald. I’ve seen The Bone Collector.]

RWD: On your moose. Or your... what did you call it... snow "machine?"

DTP: You should know that if you're a McCainiac

RWD: He is my hero.

DTP: Lovely.

RWD: Are you sure you want to have that on your blog? Aren't you afraid people might be a little enlightened? [LOOK OUT, LIBERAL MEDIA!!! HERE I AM!!!! A NON-OLD, UTTERLY STUNNING AND BRILLIANT CONSERVATIVE!!!]

DTP: I'm not concerned about your political leanings on my blog. Anything I say overwhelms it. Enlightened and Sarah Palin are not three words you'd normally see together.

RWD: My word is like the word of God.

DTP: Then tell me Yahweh .... what are the final scores this weekend?

RWD: You're done already? That's IT?

DTP: What? ‘Cos I asked the final scores? [Have you not read a Gauntlet before? Freaking amateur!] Don’t assume.

RWD: Okay, then. I was concerned. [I wasn’t done basking in my own self-importance.] 4-3 tUMD, 4-0 tUMD. Jacky with a goal. Fuzzy with 2.
DTP: LOL [Not sure what’s funny.]

RWD: I went above and beyond there.

DTP: Will you be watching on the web?

RWD: Probably. Is that naughty Santa going to be on?

DTP: I don't know who is advertising this year. I don't watch it much ya know. [Oh yah you betcha!]

DTP: How is UAA's stream compared to others?

RWD: It is great compared to any of the crap I see on B2. Like CC's floating tiger head, for example.

DTP: That thing is psychologically damaging I fear. When was the last time you and Bethlyn were stumble-down drunk together?

RWD: We never have been. I don't think I've ever been drunk in her presence.

DTP: Sigh ... boring. [This is not Penthouse Forum, Donald.]

RWD: I know. When I visited her I came down with bronchitis almost immediately upon arrival. So I didn't drink very much. I had like I sip of something. I do not need to drink to have a good time.

DTP: But you're more fun when you do.

RWD: Eh. Possibly. I'm a really mean drunk.

DTP: It's from a Holiday Inn commercial.

RWD: I have a DVR. I don't watch commercials.

DTP: Naturally. Can I ask an Entourage question?

RWD: I don't watch that either. [I think I’d prefer a commercial.]

DTP: Of course. Shouldn't you really just turn into a Gopher fan? I mean ... isn't that how it works down there?

RWD: I don't see the point. I cannot WAIT to see tDogs win their first NC. No Gopher fan can say that. The[ Gophers] are not the Borg. Resistance is not futile. Not as many people in Minneapolis are Gopher hockey fans as you might think. I mean, Donald, if I was going to be a Gopher fan, I would be. I was born (technically) on campus at the UMTC medical center. You can't get any more into the heart of Gopher country than that.

DTP: Hence my question.

RWD: But I grew up a Dogs fan. It's hereditary. I'd be disowned. Also I went to another big 10 school. [MICHIGAN SUCKS!!!!]

DTP: What team do you dislike (hate) most?

RWD: St. Cloud.

DTP: Are you as apathetic as me about Mankato?

RWD: No. I'm semi-pro Mankato. I have a lot of family there. But I can see how someone might be that way.

DTP: I'm trying to work up more hatred for them but I find them boring.

RWD: Juttz sucks. His wife is my idol though. [The mother of all cougars!!!]

DTP: What about UND? Where are they on your list?

RWD: I could not possibly care less about UND. They bore me.

DTP: Denver?

RWD: Denver is a force to be reckoned with this year.

DTP: Colorado College?

RWD: CC had better get on their horse and figure out if they're going to be a great team. Because, um, 1-0 against UAH?

DTP: UAH's goalie stood on his head.

RWD: They will be on the top 3 in the league but they need to transcend to the macrocosm if they're going to go anywhere. Great teams win those games by lots of goals. I am overly critical, but whatever. [What the heck do I care? We will take them down.]

DTP: Are you happy to get a new rink before UAA?

RWD: I am happy to get a new rink sooner rather than later. It would be nice if UAA got one, too, but I didn't feel any competitive vibes.

DTP: I recall you expressing suicide as an alternative if UAA were to get a rink before you guys

RWD: I am prone to hyperbole. And poor memory.

DTP: Ever had chicken-pox?

RWD: Yes, on Christmas. I gave it to my mom, too.

DTP: Ouch... you [female dog].

DTP: Did you cut your bangs to match Sarah's "do"?

RWD: My hair is curly and so it wouldn't really look the same. I'm actually growing it out. I got it cut kind of short when Bethlyn was here in March and felt regret. I'm actually thinking of maybe dying it white like McCain [I would look hot] for solidarity.

DTP: Make sure you use the same dye he does.

RWD: I'm sorry, is this a hockey interview? You're making it seem like I care about politics. This is not an impression I like to give.

DTP: Compare this year’s Bulldog offense to last year’s.

RWD: This year >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> last year. What else can I say? I mean... last year was just sort of a mess.

DTP: Just trying to steer it back to hockey after your politics meltdown. Are the t'dogs a 2 line or 3 line team?
RWD: Right now they are a 2 line team but they will probably become a 3 line team.

DTP: How many games do you think Stalock will play this year?

RWD: Almost all of them. I'm thinking like 40.

DTP: Do you think that will leave the team in a bit of a spot next year if Stalock doesn't return?

RWD: No, I think Brady is going to be a great goalie for us.

DTP: But Sandy won't play him much this year? Wouldn't it be a good idea to play the backup versus UAA this weekend?

RWD: I think Stalock is the horse that Sandy is going to ride. I would have thought we would see Brady last weekend. I wonder what would have happened if we had... [Love you Al, but for reals homey, that was not your best game.]

DTP: UAA goes to UMD to play on the last WCHA weekend this season. Will you be at those games?

RWD: I might. If I have school I won't.

DTP: What is your earliest memory of a Seawolf?

RWD: It's fairly vague. When I was young we would sometimes go up to my grandparents’ cabin on weekends in the winter and we would watch tUMD games on a super old tv. And sometimes those games would involve UAA. Now a whole generation of children will be deprived of that because tUMD is no longer on TV.

DTP: Do you miss Sertie?

RWD: I don't, I think it's great for him to enjoy retirement.

DTP: Does Sertie attend games at the DECC?

RWD: I don't know. Maybe? We're not BFFs.

DTP: Shouldn't that be BFsF?

RWD: No. It's just like when people say RsBI in baseball. I mean, I guess technically I should say BFF.

DTP: lol

RWD: But a "BFF" is kind of a noun, so it's pluralized as is.

DTP: You take the dumb questions so seriously. [If I didn’t take the dumb questions seriously, there would be none to take seriously.]

RWD: I feel strongly about this subject, actually. I can't stand when people type RsBI. Or "ribbies."

DTP: You are truly the Acronym Queen.

RWD: I love them. The Gophers Invite Cupcakes So We Don't Get Embarrassed At Our Own Tournament is just too long to type. GICSWEDGEAOOT is better. It almost says "Swede" in the middle. Damn that's not right.

DTP: Ultra-cool almost.

RWD: GICSWDGEAOOT. There we go.

DTP: I pay "homage" [Why is homage in quotations? I’m sure because Donald is probably pronouncing it in some foreign way.] to your love of acronyms when I can on my blog ... ever notice?

RWD: You have a blog? It's hard to tell what you're writing. You need more white space.

DTP: Yeah I know... all those words are a problem

RWD: The problem is, they are boring. No offense. [Hee]

DTP: None taken. But they aren't boring.

RWD: I'm sure to a Seawolf fan, they might not be.

DTP: They are each useful and important to make the necessary point. I'm all out of prewritten questions.

RWD: Those were prepared in advance???

DTP: A few were.

RWD: Not as easy as it looks, is it? Bow to the master.

DTP: Let me find a mirror. [Gotta look nice when you genuflect!]

RWD: So are you going to continue this interview or what?

DTP: I thought I'd just let you dangle there and decide.

RWD: Man did I ever get off easy.

DTP: Your offense at certain lines of questions kept it short.

RWD: I'm just not overly political. Also, the Gauntlet's main purpose is offense.

DTP: This isn't the Gauntlet. [No you-know-what, Sherlock.] It's a Gauntlet rip-off

RWD: It is.

DTP: It walks like the Gauntlet, it talks like the Gauntlet, but it is not the Gauntlet. Typing Gauntlet three times is hard. [But four is comparatively easier.]

RWD: It doesn't really talk like the Gauntlet.

DTP: More evidence that it is not the gauntlet then eh? [Friggin’ Canadian.] I gots to run to pick up dinner. [Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit, foo!]

RWD: Oh, did someone drive by your house and hit a rodent?

And… scene!

Hits from the Blog

Pick it, pack it, fire it up, come along and read some hits from the blog...

I know, it's lazy, but it's entertaining to me at least. One of the things I love about this blog is, even though no one reads it, I still get hits. Judging from some of these keywords, most of the people coming here are sociopaths, but I'm pleased with that.

(Also, folks, what did we learn from last week's MVP??? That if a player is a healthy scratch or isn't playing to his potential, it is most likely because he was left handcuffed to a bed by a crazy skank with a dollhouse who falsely accused him of rape and wears crazy wigs. Also, midgets are evil and will stab you in the back, and there's no point in quitting drinking because life will suck anyway. I haven't watched this week's ep. yet, but I KNOW it's going to be AMAZING.)

Anyway, here. Here is what the once and future mass murderers of the world are using as keywords for their desperate searches:

Hockey-related

grawler for checking amateurs because our grawler is a checking professional

scsu bulldog blog gonna be searching for that for a long time, buddy

umd brooms hockey decc gopher ahh, sweet memories

jordan parise naked gouge my eyes out with a rusty nail!

brian salcido kiss possible cause of the mono?

does tj oshie have have a girlfriend? 2nd most popular hit on this blog, after david james elliott shirtless.

rob bordson loves michael gergen i love him, too. i also love rob bordson.

what does the t in tumd mean ask the expert!

minnesota state mankato nick kemp blog people need to read the media guide more closely.

colby genoway in bed ok, seriously. someone is messing with me. that's the grossest thought ever conceived.

taylor chorney's girlfriend ...is me.

mike curry muscular agreed

how good is stalock he's like buttah.

jason garrison brown bear kill kodiak alaska he is SO badasssssss.

robbie earl engaged even a blind squirrel finds a nut.

Semi-hockey-related

duluth, party, football, crazy, bulldogs consider this my rsvp

marney gellner big ass screw you, she just had a baby!

stearns county syndrome, examples see uscho for a plethora

proper way to wear a toga get advice from the godfather

deer fhg yeah, probably not going to happen once he gets into the yukon.

maroon fire helmet needs redecoration!

check me from behind ohhh yeah baby

marney gellner husband yes, she has one, despite speculation to the contrary

minnesota gophers plastic cup 1986 i'm sure you'll find one in mint condition, cardinal.

fatass fhg possible typo?

What the???

depantsing from behind the only way to do it!
jordan dancer at mettlers that hit probably came from brooklyn center.
s i am so amazing, one can get to my site with a mere letter.
dogs eat man, but don't quite finish i hope they have tupperware.
rhino lined bong would probably harsh the buzz
picture of bad hair on ugly man that would be like 95% of the WCHA player photos.
why do dogs hypervenilate well, rob green, it cools them.
journalism useless major word.
how will wolves be in a hundred years mean as f***, evolution isn't that efficient.
snowmobile gauntlet alternate title for my interview with skeeterman
mankato hotties sex for free also probably came from brooklyn center
dying puppies in saint cloud i didn't think their season was that bad.
sexy mitosis technically correct
do dogs know when you look at them ugly? yes, why are you so mean?
deer attacks dog in hermantown preferrably a dachsund
bleeding from ears get off the internet and CALL 911!
what would worf do probably live in his mom's basement and get a job as a computer programmer. are you happy?
sweatpants for dogs conspicuous consumption
what happened to curly headed guy on alltel commercial? i'm hoping for "he died a painful death." or "prison bitch."
cougar bars in minnesota i would buy that in pamphlet form!
what means if boy holds your hair you've probably had too much tequila.
i has blog i shove i does!
bootcamp haircut bleeding maybe you shouldn't have mouthed off to the DI, private joker.
mile high club penalties possibly checking from behind, or spearing.
bed and breakfasts that except tdogs i would assume all. at least i would hope, for my honeymoon with Evan S.
photo of jason giambi drinking jack daniels from a bottle glad it's not "photos of RWD" doing the same thing

The All-WCHA Hottie Teams

Coach: Jamie Russell***, MTU
Blogger: Dirty of Dirty's Diatribe!

1st team:
F Ryan Peckskamp*, SCSU
F Merit Waldrop*, UAA
F T.J. Oshie**, UND
D R.J. Linder**, MSUM
D Geoff Kinrade, MTU
G Robby Nolan**, MTU

2nd team:
F Matt Hartman, SCSU
F Chris VandeVelde*, UND
F Rob Bordson, UMD
D Kane Lafranchise, UAA
D Jason Garrison, UMD
G Richard Bachman, CC

3rd Team:
F Mike Testwuide, CC
F Scott Thauwald, CC
F Michael Gergen, UMD
D J.P. Testwuide, DU
D Davis Drewiske, UW
G Michael-Lee Teslak, MTU

Freshman Team:
F Rob Bordson, UMD
F Jordan Baker, MTU
F Brian Gifford, DU
D Ben Youds, MSUM
D Kane Lafranchise, UAA
G Richard Bachman, CC

*denotes two-time honoree
** denotes three-time honoree
*** denotes four-time honoree

2007 Honorees
2006 Honorees
2005 Honorees

********************************EDIT***********************************
FINALLY, all of the RWD contributors have made their own hottie lists. A certain short girl from Michigan was holding up the show. LGM is applauded for her timely contribution: she was the only one who submitted her counter-list before the deadline. This is the second year I have invited a few of my fellow bloggers/hockey fans to make their own counter-lists. Hottness is very subjective, so I thought I'd give others an opportunity to show who they think is hott.

MEg's picks
F T.J. Oshie, UND
F Tyler Bozak, DU
F Tom May, DU
D Geoff Kinrade, MTU
D Stu Bickel, UMTC
G Robby Nolan, MTU

WinTwins's picks
F Mike Testwuide, CC
F Ryan Peckskamp, SCSU
F Michael Gergen, UMD
D RJ Linder, MSUM
D Jake Gannon, CC
G Jase Weslosky, SCSU

Let's Go Mavs's picks
F Ben Gordon, UMTC
F Joel Hanson, MSUM
F Ryan Peckskamp, SCSU
D RJ Linder, MSUM
D Garrett Raboin, SCSU
G Richard Bachman, CC

A Tale of Two Teams

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of defence, it was the age of turnovers, it was the epoch of shutouts, it was the epoch of getting shut out, it was the season of expectations, it was the season of disappointments, it was the first half of hope, it was the second half of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to the NCAAs, we were all going direct to the golf course--in short, some of the season's noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative.

Back in October, I don't think I could have predicted how deeply I am feeling the end of the season. Jim Morrison might say "This is the strangest season I've ever known." I came into the season with very low expectations, although every season I hope the team will rise above its circumstances and exceed my expectations. I would say this season is even more strange than the 2004-2005 season, when we were the top-ranked team in the country and then spiralled into a team that was practically run out of North Dakota on a rail in the WCHA playoffs. I try to balance my blooming hopes for the season with some roots planted firmly in the dirt of reality. I knew we probably wouldn't finish very well this season, and I knew it was a matter of riding out this season before we arrived at a team that would go places. No offense to any of the guys on the team this year, but there a few key pieces were missing. It's not your fault, and you played your best, and I am still crazy about ALL OF YOU. This team was supposed to have a healthy Garrison and a powerplay quarterback in Niskanen and a speedster in Mason Raymond, along with another key penalty killer in Logan Gorsalitz. None of that is really important because what happened this season has nothing to do with any of those guys (with the exception of Jason, whose injury was totally unfortunate and abhorrent as it was inflicted upon him by the heinous Badgers).

Quite unexpectedly, we started off the season winning. And when we lost, we bounced back with a win the next night. We were winning the freaking league at one point. According to the pairwise, we were in the NCAA tournament and had control of our destiny up until the final game of the season. What makes this season more disappointing than the last two seasons are the golden opportunities that passed us by. We had a chance to surpass our point total from the previous season in December, and we didn't until February. We had a chance at home ice and we ended up in Denver. We had a chance at the NCAAs and now we have none. We had a chance to beat Denver, a team missing their leading scorer and demoralized by CC the weekend prior, a team we'd already beaten once this year (On my birthday! Thanks guys!) and a team we'd leapfrogged over to get to the Final Five two years ago, and now here we are. With no more hockey for almost seven months.

Along with my disappointment I feel a contradictory twinge of gratitude for this season. A season with hope is infinitely better than a season with no hope, even if the hopes don't come to fruition. There is no way I could feel this low if I hadn't felt elated at points during the season, if until the final buzzer of last night's game I hadn't lived inside the hope we could keep playing for another day, another series, another few weeks. There are so many things about this season that were wonderful and fun and amazing. Alex Stalock set the school record for shutout minutes. We swept St. Cloud. We won at Mariucci. We lost 8-3 in Grand Forks and came back and WON the next night. Every single freshman on the team, and in fact every PLAYER on the team (excepting Ziggy and Reiter, who are excused) scored a point this season. I drove to Duluth and back in the same night to see tDogs come back and beat Mankato in overtime on a goal from a freshman assisted by two other freshmen. Mike Curry found his scoring touch in the last few games of the season, and laid out some bone-jarring hits in the process. Howie announced the first-ever penalty for cross-dressing.

My only regrets this season are the things I can control. I regret the games I missed and the road trips not taken. I care about winning and I care about tournaments and trophies and that all-important first banner, but I care about this team, whoever is on it, first and foremost. They could lose every game (please don't, guys) and I'd still cheer and taunt the opponents and hope for a win and throw stuff around and curse my brains out and get mad at each loss. I'm already counting the days until next year, and licking my chops at the prospect of home ice and the NCAAs.

THE FINAL NUMBERS
My Guy of the Year: MacGregor Sharp, 17 points! (Also the team scoring champion!)
Matt McKnight: 16!
Michael Gergen: 13!
Mike Curry: 7!

Freshman Scoring Champion: Justin Fontaine, 12 points!
Kyle Schmidt: 8!
Cody Danberg: 7!
Rob Bordson: 7!
Evan Oberg: 3!
Chad Huttel: 2!
Mike Montgomery: 1!



I plagiarized and paraphrased my opener from Dickens, FYI. He's dead, so who cares?

Yesterday

I wrote this entry in class this morning, while I was waiting for the rest of the class to finish taking their midterms. I'm a very fast test-taker.

tUMD 1, Dirty Hacks 3

Obviously, I'm dissatisfied with the outcome of last night's game. I mean, duh, we lost, that's never a fantastic thing. I hate giving up empty net goals; they're so demoralizing, especially when they come with so much time left in the game.

The real loss of the game, however, is the Very Handsome Jason Garrison. He allegedly has a broken leg and will allegedly be out for the rest of the season (Pates says so, but Sandy won't confirm), and I'm very sad. He's obviously an integral part of the team and one of our top 3 defencemen. The circumstances of the injury seemed a little strange, as it appeared Patrick Johnson smashed him from behind into the boards (at least, that was the audible reaction of Justin May, Renaissance Man) right after he lost an edge. Bruce goes on about it over on his site, so whatever, I don't need to repeat him. At any rate, we will miss his presence. DA pointed out perhaps a different defenceman would have been more expendable, because we'd have about three less penalties a game, but I think the whole D-corps responded nicely to their hardship and didn't take any interference penalties or anything. This is certainly a golden opportunity for Chase "Put Me In Coach!" Ryan or Chad "I Overstated My Height On The Roster" Huttel to step into a more regular role. What this means for Garrison, Gawryletz, and Montgomery's band is unknown. It all depends on if he is the drummer or not. If he's a guitarist, it's cool, because he can sit down and sing soulful ballads. I hope they write a song about me, and it's not derogatory.

I have to applaud Sandelin for taking such a huge risk by pulling Stalock with so much time left in the game, during a stoppage in play. It showed a lot of confidence in our guys, and especially in My Guy MacGregor Sharp, who won the face-off and gave us control of the puck. We had possession for quite awhile and some great chances before Wisconsin got control and scored their empty net goal.

The lone goal in the game came from Travis Gawryletz on the power play, which must have meant the moon was in the seventh house and Jupiter aligned with Mars. It was an awesome goal that I'm sure many other guys were jealous of: he was all alone on the backdoor and lifted the puck over Connelly's leg. I saw this because the game was randomly televised here in the Cities. I am so pleased to take TG Off Notice for the first time this season!

Other exciting news: Mike Curry returned to the lineup after a long absence due to injury!

Awesome

Okay, I don't normally check the official tUMD hockey site, but I always like to see the player profiles. Not that they ask particularly probing questions, and not that anyone EVER says that RWD is their favorite site, but still, I like to see if I can get any more stalking information.

However, it is important to note that in the most recent player profile, Jason Garrison mentions that his favorite college course is PHYSICS. That should be EVERYONE'S FAVORITE COURSE. He also mentions his favorite pastime is vacuuming; physics probably helped him take vacuuming to a new level.

Also, despite only 1 point on the weekend, tStalock was named tWCHAPOTW. BRING BACK THE SUPERFANS!

Put 'Em On The Glass

tUMD 4, tMTU 1

It's not really what it looks like. We really won 2-1, with 2 ENGs, which is fine, because a win's a win no matter how you get it. Our win is JUST as valuable as Denver's 7-0 whomping of MSUM (vengeance for the 8-7 embarrassment of a few years ago?), if not more valuable, as a win over Tech is more helpful in the PWR. And man, am I glad that we can consider PWR again!

Last night, we went for a little change of pace and sat on the glass next to the penalty box. It's not exactly the greatest place to sit, as your view is limited in a few place, but it's also a great feeling to be down on ice level for the glass-rattling hits. Or to see Jason Garrison almost fall into the visitor's penalty box because the door flew open. I wouldn't recommend sitting down there often, as I had a distorted view of every goal except the empty netters, but it's so cool when the action's in your end. I could see the intensity of Matt McKnight's face on the face-off, and I could see Gawryletz's weird mulletesque hair in all its glory.

The major problem with our seats was not the view, but the company. I know people have complaints about a lot of annoying things, like people blocking your view or asking dumb questions ("Who is Huffer Christiansen?" Jeez, what are we teaching in those schools?), so my complaint is minor, but this dude behind me was ripping on Mike Curry. Not cool. I was really hoping for Big Mike to get a goal or an assist or something so I could substantiate my claims of Curry Supremacy, but except for one bone-jarring hit on one of his first shifts, and a penalty for high-sticking (My response: "It's not fair! He's just tall!"), he didn't do much to distinguish himself.

My big complaint this game is with... can you guess? THE POWER PLAY. Oh my god. It's not good, and we had better get it straightened out before we go to Grand Forks. My first suggestion is: Matt McKnight needs to GET OFF THE POINT. Put someone on there who can hold the zone. Of course, Matt McKnight is one of My Guys, so this isn't a direct criticism of him, but merely a suggestion on where to play him to his potential. Now, we did have some great chances on the PP, but we got a 5 on 3 for 1:15 and zippo. Tech scored 2 power plays, and their own FANS admitted their PP sucks. We did get a VERY nice delayed penalty goal which I never thought would happen.

One of the zambonis died on the rink between the first and second periods, and crapped snow all over the ice. It was funny.

After the game was fun. I ate some pizza, stalked some dads (hi, Mr. Fulton!), and licked MEg. A good time was had by all.

The drive home today was very annoying. Once we got closer to the Cities, we ran into a bunch of people hauling ATVs/dead deer/snowmobiles/small churches. I would compare our situation to trying to leg out a Texas League double with Frank Thomas, Jason Phillips, and Prince Fielder on the basepaths ahead of me. Yargh. We had a very nice stay at a place called the Firelight Inn, which is not too far away from the RWD Ancestral Home (located at 21st and E. Superior). Nothing says romance like Bulldog hockey and a bed and breakfast! I would certainly recommend the place for anyone visiting Duluth. It's not dirt cheap or anything, but it's beautiful, quiet, and the breakfast is grubbin'. The folks who run it are extremely nice, and you get every amenity you'll get at a hotel and then some.

I'm glad to be home, and I'm glad my first Bulldog series of the season resulted in three points! This coming weekend, we'll probably see new levels of whining from the UND fans. I can't wait to see what kind of heinous behavior they will defend this week.

Speaking of heinous behavior, here's the Mattias Ohlund slash on Mikko Koivu from Friday night's Wild game. A four game suspension is a slap on the wrist compared to what Ohlund deserves. (If Kyle Radke had done this to, say, Michael Gergen, it would be considered "gritty play," or "Gergen deserved it," or "The Bulldogs should wear tutus and dance like hippos if they don't want to get slashed in the back of the leg, this is HOCKEY!") Koivu is one of My Guys in pro hockey (along with Mark Parrish), and you just don't mess with one of my guys. Although no one deserves to be slashed like that.

THE NUMBERS
Wins Until We Surpass Last Year's Total: 4!
Points Until We Surpass Last Year's Total: 11!

My Guys:
MacGregor Sharp: 7!
Matt McKnight: 5!
Michael Gergen: 5!
Mike Curry: 1 (But his mere presence in the game cemented our win!)

Freshmen:
Justin Fontaine: 3
Cody Danberg: 1
Rob Bordson: 1
Everyone else: 0

On Notice:
Points
Evan Oberg
Kyle Schmidt
Jay Cascalenda
Andrew Carroll
Matt Greer
Cody Danberg

Goals only
Drew Akins
Nick Kemp (but getting plenty of chances! Especially shorthanded!)
Jason Garrison
Travis Gawryletz
Alex Stalock
Trent Palm
MacGregor Sharp

The Gauntlet: Multimedia Edition

That's right, baby. It's back. Sort of. For the first The Gauntlet of the season, RWD interviewed sometime Bulldog photographer, copy-editor, and mixmaster Larry R.

RWD: So, usually I am better prepared, with planned lines of questioning, but since I'm not out to trap you into admitting something or trying to make you look crazy, I'm not as organized.

Larry: Considering most of the tens [of people reading RWD…] already think I'm nuts, feel free to fire away.

RWD: Tens of people may be exaggerating.

Larry: Well I know I read it, not with any dedication, but I've been there multiple times. [Oooh! That means elevens of readers!]

RWD: Superb! That makes me very happy. Perhaps you could start out by informing my readers who don't know you exactly how you are involved with the UMD hockey program.

Larry: Now my involvement is as a volunteer. I'm available to them as needed for whatever type [of] help they need: stats, photography and operations director for game nights. Back in 1997, I was involved in setting up their music system, and brought full time planned music to games. I did that for 5 years, and now it’s more of a support role. [Isn't Larry the genius behind "Don't Stop Believin'," which has been ripped off by everyone from other sports teams to tSopranos?]

RWD: How long have you been a Bulldogs fan?

Larry: I'm really aging myself, but I've been a fan since 1983. I became a Dogs fan when Mom said I couldn't go to Madison to go to college because it was too big, so I traded Cardinal Red and White in for Maroon and Gold.

RWD: The best choice you've ever made.

Larry: Without a doubt, the friends I've made with my involvement at UMD are priceless. [For buying additional friends, there's MasterCard.]

RWD: Were you a college hockey fan in college?

Larry: I was a freshman in 1985. I waited outside (it was a true camp out back then) the Thursday night before the Monday tickets went on sale. I failed my first collegiate exam because I was out drinking when I should have been studying for a [microeconomics] exam. I was a season ticket holder for four years, and my last year, I worked for the Sports Info Office, so I didn't need a ticket.

RWD: So that's a yes.

Larry: Definitely. I think I missed a total of 6 home games in 5 years.

RWD: 5 years is a bit accelerated compared to some current tUMD fans. [RWD included!]

Larry: I was ready to go. 1987-1990 weren't the best hockey years. Seriously, I love Dale Jago, but top scorer?

RWD: I'll just note that here... *man-love for Dale Jago*

Larry: I'm sure his wife will appreciate that.

RWD: Are the college years a bit of a blur for you, or do you have some outstanding memories of Great Moments in Bulldog History?

Larry: I don't have my media guide within reach to cheat, so I'm all on my own. It started so strong with Hull. Just to watch him skate was amazing. I remember a shot that he took from the blue line that hit behind the top rows at the top of the DECC and bounced back to where the Zamboni comes out. It might have broken the safety net; it was that hard. After that, you know the team trended down, so it wasn't a great set of years to be there. We had some fun, I traveled a lot to the away games, but there were certainly more nights drinking over losses than partying over winning… It was different back then, the team had house parties and they lived at the Warehouse, so it was never a boring time.

RWD: Team house parties! Sounds exciting! [It must have been much easier to be a stalker back then.] Where was this "Warehouse" located?

Larry: One of the many Park Point Hotels is now occupying its place. It was right next to the Burger King that used to be on Park Point. It was "THE" college bar during the time I was in school. Grandma's was for the upscale kids and where girls went because they didn't want to get spilled on. Everyone else was at the Warehouse.

RWD: I would definitely be at the Warehouse. [Getting Old Milwaukee dumped on me and getting confused for a guy, obvs.]

Larry: You would have been right at home there. It was definitely a tPB type of place.

RWD: Would you say there was more interest in Bulldog hockey back then (both in the community and among students), or less?

Larry: I think it has followed the same course it does today. 1984-86 there would be people scalping tickets outside, much like the end of 2004 and to some extent 2005. But when the team isn't winning, the interest goes down. My first senior year, nobody waited in line for student season tickets.

RWD: It goes in cycles, I suppose. It would be nice if those winning cycles were longer.

Larry: I think that everyone wishes that. I'd be happy to finish in the top 5 every year. In this league that is all you can ask for.

RWD: So after college, did you stay in Duluth or double-cross it back to Wisconsin?

Larry: I left for 6 years, moved a lot working for a company in Wisconsin, but they opened an office in Duluth and I moved back [for awhile].

RWD: Do you still cheer for Bucky, or have you seen the light?

Larry: I [currently] live about 90 minutes from Madison, and so I still cheer for them when they don't play the Dogs, but you won't see me in any Wisconsin hockey gear anytime soon. I'm a huge Badger Football and Basketball fan. But part of that comes from the fact there is absolutely no way you will every see me with an M on shirt.

RWD: So you save your real hatred for UMTC.

Larry: I have absolutely no love for their program at all.

RWD: Back when you were in college, who were some of your favorites (other than your bf Dale)?

Larry: Hull, of course, but I was more a fan of the working class guys. Joe DeLisle will probably be one of my all time favorite players.

RWD: When did you start doing photography for the games?

Larry: I traveled with the team in 2004 to Boston, and I had my camera there. In 2005, I got a call from Jess Myers (who was working for Inside College Hockey) asking if I could shoot a game, and I've been covering for them ever since.

RWD: Who do/did you enjoy photographing the most?

Larry: I like shooting goaltenders [I agree, I sometimes feel like shooting goaltenders, too.]; they provide the best action shots. Alex is a lot of fun to shoot because he is so mobile. Elliott from Wisconsin always seemed to come up big, and Lamoureux from North Dakota provided a great shot that ended up being a save that was ESPN's play of the day during the Frozen Four. I have that as a poster that I'm waiting to get signed. [Larry = the ultimate Fan Boy.]

RWD: Are most of the photos from the Bulldogs' site your own?

Larry: The school has an official photographer, so most are his. I try to schedule my trips home when he isn't there so I can get something up on the web.

RWD: Do you ever do photos for the DNT?

Larry: I do some freelance for them; I do some work when they don't have coverage and I'm in town or if they are on the road, I'll send pictures up.

RWD: You would think they would have a staff photographer just for the Bulldogs.

Larry: Their sports department is pretty small and they have a huge area to cover. Budgets just don't allow them to keep someone like that on staff.

RWD: I just laughed. What exactly are they covering that's more important than the Bulldogs? Smelt fishing? [No offense, DA and Gramps.]

Larry: I'm sure they spend a great deal of time covering things like the DHW [Drunk Hockey Walk] [Brilliant! I couldn't think of a better use of resources. Except that nothing I do on the DHW is anything I'd want documented for the public domain]. That goes in cycles too. When they win, they get more coverage. When I was in Boston, they had 3 people out there, so keep winning is the rule to better coverage. That’s why the women’s team gets its fair share.

RWD: Oh man, you touched on the hot button issue. [Bracing for impact.]

Larry: I am usually on the wrong side of that issue.

RWD: I don't have an issue with women's hockey, other than no checking. Who would you say are some of your current favorite Bulldogs? Or are you going to Ciskie-out and say all of them?

Larry: Nah. I don't have to deal with them on a daily basis or need them to keep a talk show running. Do I get bonus points for Mr. Curry? Jason Garrison is one of them, I was a big Bryan McGregor fan (they'll miss him) and I like Alex because he is so unpredictable.

RWD: Well, don't lie. If you don't like Curry, don't say you do to suck up to me. Not that anyone could NOT like him.

Larry: Not knowing what you like about him aside, he is a great presence on the ice, and I like how he works. And if he ever gets paired up in the penalty box, you can learn a lot why he gets under peoples skin.

RWD: I'm a fan of that. Everything he does it seems is designed to irritate someone.

Larry: He’s a lot like Stauffacher, except bigger. [Um, like a whole freaking foot bigger.]

RWD: I'm surprised you would find "unpredictability" in a goaltender "likeable." [I'm sure Scott Sandelin thinks it's a laugh riot.]

Larry: That’s the photographer talking. My dad would like him to be more predictable.

RWD: How about your all-time Bulldog favorites?

Larry: Hull, Podein, DeLisle, Plante, Lessard (love the accent).

RWD: What do you think about Junior's professional situation?

Larry: He has enough talent to play in the league. I'm not an expert on NHL clubs and their needs, but he could be an every day player for someone.

RWD: Evidently no one felt that way, as he cleared waivers and will be in the AHL. [With the extremely sexy Chris Conner.]

Larry: Hopefully he'll end up in Milwaukee and I can go see him play. I'll drop $12 a night to go watch him skate.

RWD: If you were the coach of the Bulldogs, what would you do differently?

Larry: Not that Scott needs my help, but I'd really like to see two things: get someone who isn't afraid to crash the offensive zone with the puck, and I'd really like to see them try something different with the power play. [NO FREAKING KIDDING. Maybe they need to try a little more cowbell.]

RWD: That was a nice roundabout way of seeing where you stand on the coaching issue.

Larry: He has a tough job, and I imagine there is some real pressure on him to win. I think losing Nisky is the big loss, my understanding that while UMD may miss the scoring touch, they'll be better off as a team without Raymond.

RWD: Wow, can I print that without being sued for libel?

[some stuff]

RWD: Most Bulldogs fans have two outlooks to the season: what they hope will happen, and what they believe will happen. The two rarely align. What are your predictions and hopes?

Larry: As a lifelong Packer fan, I know how that goes. I think they finish 5th, and end up making it to the WCHAs. I always hope they make a run, because it makes the post season more fun when you have somebody to cheer for at the rink.

RWD: So you think, realistically, they are going to be 5th in tWCHA? [As you can probably tell, I'm still trying to wrap my mind around this.]

Larry: I think they have a shot at it. Alex is going to have to carry the team, and he does have the talent. If the team gets off to a good start, they have the ability to catch people. If the team comes out as a team, they'll be able to string some wins together, and that will give them the confidence they need to be successful. But then, I was always the [delusional] optimistic guy.

RWD: To wrap things up, as this could go on all night, I'll open it up to any comments you want to make about Bulldog hockey.

Larry: I think the Dogs will surprise some people this year. I'm excited for the year, The Superior Cup with some teams that used to be good rivals, and a league that is always stacked with talent. If they get some league wins early they can position themselves for a playoff run. Unfortunately, the schedule at the end of the year is a big test. But that’s when you'll see what character they have.

RWD: Any bold predictions, or "calls" as Bert Blyleven says?

Larry: Wisconsin wins the league in a runaway. The three first round picks that they have make them a force to be dealt with right away. That being said, they probably finish 4th.

RWD: Whoa, it's not a call unless you believe it's going to happen. No qualifiers. No reneging.

Larry: I believe they have the ability to run away with the league. But, if reality sets in...

RWD: Who's your breakout player of the year for tDogs?

Larry: Put your money on Michael Gergen. [I have none, thanks for reminding me.] I think he has the most to gain from Raymond leaving early. If he steps up and takes the offensive role that they brought him in with, watch out.

RWD: Ooh, he is My Guy, other than Curry. Most Impactful Freshman?

Larry: Evan Oberg. He'll step up and replace Nisky right away. Close second for Cody Danberg if he stays healthy.

RWD: Larry's Personal Player of the Year?

Larry: Andrew Carroll. He provides the leadership and will lead the team in points.

RWD: Well, that's the good word.

I can't believe I friggin' forgot to ask him who the hottest Bulldog was!