RWD would just like everyone to know that the Gauntlet has been thrown down to the bloggers of Tech Still Sucks, and they as yet have not even acknowledged it. Will they give me satisfaction, or be branded cowards for the rest of their days?
That's right, baby. It's back. Sort of. For the first The Gauntlet of the season, RWD interviewed sometime Bulldog photographer, copy-editor, and mixmaster Larry R.
RWD: So, usually I am better prepared, with planned lines of questioning, but since I'm not out to trap you into admitting something or trying to make you look crazy, I'm not as organized.
Larry: Considering most of the tens [of people reading RWD…] already think I'm nuts, feel free to fire away.
RWD: Tens of people may be exaggerating.
Larry: Well I know I read it, not with any dedication, but I've been there multiple times. [Oooh! That means elevens of readers!]
RWD: Superb! That makes me very happy. Perhaps you could start out by informing my readers who don't know you exactly how you are involved with the UMD hockey program.
Larry: Now my involvement is as a volunteer. I'm available to them as needed for whatever type [of] help they need: stats, photography and operations director for game nights. Back in 1997, I was involved in setting up their music system, and brought full time planned music to games. I did that for 5 years, and now it’s more of a support role. [Isn't Larry the genius behind "Don't Stop Believin'," which has been ripped off by everyone from other sports teams to tSopranos?]
RWD: How long have you been a Bulldogs fan?
Larry: I'm really aging myself, but I've been a fan since 1983. I became a Dogs fan when Mom said I couldn't go to Madison to go to college because it was too big, so I traded Cardinal Red and White in for Maroon and Gold.
RWD: The best choice you've ever made.
Larry: Without a doubt, the friends I've made with my involvement at UMD are priceless. [For buying additional friends, there's MasterCard.]
RWD: Were you a college hockey fan in college?
Larry: I was a freshman in 1985. I waited outside (it was a true camp out back then) the Thursday night before the Monday tickets went on sale. I failed my first collegiate exam because I was out drinking when I should have been studying for a [microeconomics] exam. I was a season ticket holder for four years, and my last year, I worked for the Sports Info Office, so I didn't need a ticket.
RWD: So that's a yes.
Larry: Definitely. I think I missed a total of 6 home games in 5 years.
RWD: 5 years is a bit accelerated compared to some current tUMD fans. [RWD included!]
Larry: I was ready to go. 1987-1990 weren't the best hockey years. Seriously, I love Dale Jago, but top scorer?
RWD: I'll just note that here... *man-love for Dale Jago*
Larry: I'm sure his wife will appreciate that.
RWD: Are the college years a bit of a blur for you, or do you have some outstanding memories of Great Moments in Bulldog History?
Larry: I don't have my media guide within reach to cheat, so I'm all on my own. It started so strong with Hull. Just to watch him skate was amazing. I remember a shot that he took from the blue line that hit behind the top rows at the top of the DECC and bounced back to where the Zamboni comes out. It might have broken the safety net; it was that hard. After that, you know the team trended down, so it wasn't a great set of years to be there. We had some fun, I traveled a lot to the away games, but there were certainly more nights drinking over losses than partying over winning… It was different back then, the team had house parties and they lived at the Warehouse, so it was never a boring time.
RWD: Team house parties! Sounds exciting! [It must have been much easier to be a stalker back then.] Where was this "Warehouse" located?
Larry: One of the many Park Point Hotels is now occupying its place. It was right next to the Burger King that used to be on Park Point. It was "THE" college bar during the time I was in school. Grandma's was for the upscale kids and where girls went because they didn't want to get spilled on. Everyone else was at the Warehouse.
RWD: I would definitely be at the Warehouse. [Getting Old Milwaukee dumped on me and getting confused for a guy, obvs.]
Larry: You would have been right at home there. It was definitely a tPB type of place.
RWD: Would you say there was more interest in Bulldog hockey back then (both in the community and among students), or less?
Larry: I think it has followed the same course it does today. 1984-86 there would be people scalping tickets outside, much like the end of 2004 and to some extent 2005. But when the team isn't winning, the interest goes down. My first senior year, nobody waited in line for student season tickets.
RWD: It goes in cycles, I suppose. It would be nice if those winning cycles were longer.
Larry: I think that everyone wishes that. I'd be happy to finish in the top 5 every year. In this league that is all you can ask for.
RWD: So after college, did you stay in Duluth or double-cross it back to Wisconsin?
Larry: I left for 6 years, moved a lot working for a company in Wisconsin, but they opened an office in Duluth and I moved back [for awhile].
RWD: Do you still cheer for Bucky, or have you seen the light?
Larry: I [currently] live about 90 minutes from Madison, and so I still cheer for them when they don't play the Dogs, but you won't see me in any Wisconsin hockey gear anytime soon. I'm a huge Badger Football and Basketball fan. But part of that comes from the fact there is absolutely no way you will every see me with an M on shirt.
RWD: So you save your real hatred for UMTC.
Larry: I have absolutely no love for their program at all.
RWD: Back when you were in college, who were some of your favorites (other than your bf Dale)?
Larry: Hull, of course, but I was more a fan of the working class guys. Joe DeLisle will probably be one of my all time favorite players.
RWD: When did you start doing photography for the games?
Larry: I traveled with the team in 2004 to Boston, and I had my camera there. In 2005, I got a call from Jess Myers (who was working for Inside College Hockey) asking if I could shoot a game, and I've been covering for them ever since.
RWD: Who do/did you enjoy photographing the most?
Larry: I like shooting goaltenders [I agree, I sometimes feel like shooting goaltenders, too.]; they provide the best action shots. Alex is a lot of fun to shoot because he is so mobile. Elliott from Wisconsin always seemed to come up big, and Lamoureux from North Dakota provided a great shot that ended up being a save that was ESPN's play of the day during the Frozen Four. I have that as a poster that I'm waiting to get signed. [Larry = the ultimate Fan Boy.]
RWD: Are most of the photos from the Bulldogs' site your own?
Larry: The school has an official photographer, so most are his. I try to schedule my trips home when he isn't there so I can get something up on the web.
RWD: Do you ever do photos for the DNT?
Larry: I do some freelance for them; I do some work when they don't have coverage and I'm in town or if they are on the road, I'll send pictures up.
RWD: You would think they would have a staff photographer just for the Bulldogs.
Larry: Their sports department is pretty small and they have a huge area to cover. Budgets just don't allow them to keep someone like that on staff.
RWD: I just laughed. What exactly are they covering that's more important than the Bulldogs? Smelt fishing? [No offense, DA and Gramps.]
Larry: I'm sure they spend a great deal of time covering things like the DHW [Drunk Hockey Walk] [Brilliant! I couldn't think of a better use of resources. Except that nothing I do on the DHW is anything I'd want documented for the public domain]. That goes in cycles too. When they win, they get more coverage. When I was in Boston, they had 3 people out there, so keep winning is the rule to better coverage. That’s why the women’s team gets its fair share.
RWD: Oh man, you touched on the hot button issue. [Bracing for impact.]
Larry: I am usually on the wrong side of that issue.
RWD: I don't have an issue with women's hockey, other than no checking. Who would you say are some of your current favorite Bulldogs? Or are you going to Ciskie-out and say all of them?
Larry: Nah. I don't have to deal with them on a daily basis or need them to keep a talk show running. Do I get bonus points for Mr. Curry? Jason Garrison is one of them, I was a big Bryan McGregor fan (they'll miss him) and I like Alex because he is so unpredictable.
RWD: Well, don't lie. If you don't like Curry, don't say you do to suck up to me. Not that anyone could NOT like him.
Larry: Not knowing what you like about him aside, he is a great presence on the ice, and I like how he works. And if he ever gets paired up in the penalty box, you can learn a lot why he gets under peoples skin.
RWD: I'm a fan of that. Everything he does it seems is designed to irritate someone.
Larry: He’s a lot like Stauffacher, except bigger. [Um, like a whole freaking foot bigger.]
RWD: I'm surprised you would find "unpredictability" in a goaltender "likeable." [I'm sure Scott Sandelin thinks it's a laugh riot.]
Larry: That’s the photographer talking. My dad would like him to be more predictable.
RWD: How about your all-time Bulldog favorites?
Larry: Hull, Podein, DeLisle, Plante, Lessard (love the accent).
RWD: What do you think about Junior's professional situation?
Larry: He has enough talent to play in the league. I'm not an expert on NHL clubs and their needs, but he could be an every day player for someone.
RWD: Evidently no one felt that way, as he cleared waivers and will be in the AHL. [With the extremely sexy Chris Conner.]
Larry: Hopefully he'll end up in Milwaukee and I can go see him play. I'll drop $12 a night to go watch him skate.
RWD: If you were the coach of the Bulldogs, what would you do differently?
Larry: Not that Scott needs my help, but I'd really like to see two things: get someone who isn't afraid to crash the offensive zone with the puck, and I'd really like to see them try something different with the power play. [NO FREAKING KIDDING. Maybe they need to try a little more cowbell.]
RWD: That was a nice roundabout way of seeing where you stand on the coaching issue.
Larry: He has a tough job, and I imagine there is some real pressure on him to win. I think losing Nisky is the big loss, my understanding that while UMD may miss the scoring touch, they'll be better off as a team without Raymond.
RWD: Wow, can I print that without being sued for libel?
[some stuff]
RWD: Most Bulldogs fans have two outlooks to the season: what they hope will happen, and what they believe will happen. The two rarely align. What are your predictions and hopes?
Larry: As a lifelong Packer fan, I know how that goes. I think they finish 5th, and end up making it to the WCHAs. I always hope they make a run, because it makes the post season more fun when you have somebody to cheer for at the rink.
RWD: So you think, realistically, they are going to be 5th in tWCHA? [As you can probably tell, I'm still trying to wrap my mind around this.]
Larry: I think they have a shot at it. Alex is going to have to carry the team, and he does have the talent. If the team gets off to a good start, they have the ability to catch people. If the team comes out as a team, they'll be able to string some wins together, and that will give them the confidence they need to be successful. But then, I was always the [delusional] optimistic guy.
RWD: To wrap things up, as this could go on all night, I'll open it up to any comments you want to make about Bulldog hockey.
Larry: I think the Dogs will surprise some people this year. I'm excited for the year, The Superior Cup with some teams that used to be good rivals, and a league that is always stacked with talent. If they get some league wins early they can position themselves for a playoff run. Unfortunately, the schedule at the end of the year is a big test. But that’s when you'll see what character they have.
RWD: Any bold predictions, or "calls" as Bert Blyleven says?
Larry: Wisconsin wins the league in a runaway. The three first round picks that they have make them a force to be dealt with right away. That being said, they probably finish 4th.
RWD: Whoa, it's not a call unless you believe it's going to happen. No qualifiers. No reneging.
Larry: I believe they have the ability to run away with the league. But, if reality sets in...
RWD: Who's your breakout player of the year for tDogs?
Larry: Put your money on Michael Gergen. [I have none, thanks for reminding me.] I think he has the most to gain from Raymond leaving early. If he steps up and takes the offensive role that they brought him in with, watch out.
RWD: Ooh, he is My Guy, other than Curry. Most Impactful Freshman?
Larry: Evan Oberg. He'll step up and replace Nisky right away. Close second for Cody Danberg if he stays healthy.
RWD: Larry's Personal Player of the Year?
Larry: Andrew Carroll. He provides the leadership and will lead the team in points.
RWD: Well, that's the good word.
I can't believe I friggin' forgot to ask him who the hottest Bulldog was!
Okay, this part may be total garbage, but exciting news!
Matt Niskanen made the lineup for the Dallas Stars and will be playing tomorrow night! YOU SEE, PEOPLE! This is what HAPPENS when you are My Guy of the Year. FAME AND GLORY. I know I'll be watching Vs tomorrow night.
Additionally, Mason Raymond is slated to play on a line with the Swedish Twins. All I can think of is that commercial where the Sedins were hired for that bachelor party and they brought a crappy boombox and tentatively started doing the cabbage patch.
It's what you've all been waiting for! It's time for RWD to name My Guys for the 2007-2008 season! Last year, My Guys were Mike Curry, Michael Gergen, Matt McKnight, Jason Garrison, and Matt Niskanen. My Guy of the Year (based solely on points scored) was Matt Niskanen, who has abandoned me for the hated Dallas Stars.
This year's My Guys are:
Mike Curry
Michael Gergen
Matt McKnight
MacGregor Sharp
My Guys hold the distinction of being my favorites amongst the Dogs, which means they are not eligible for the Humane Society of the WCHA (where I send Bulldogs when they are bad), and I will not tolerate any criticism from outsiders.
Please note that freshmen are not eligible to become one of My Guys as I have not had the chance to see their stuff. Thus, they have their own competition, Freshman Scoring Champion. Last year's title was shared by Jordan Fulton and Drew Akins. This year, we have a significantly larger number of competitors:
Rob Bordson
Cody Danberg
Justin Fontaine
Chad Huttel
Mike Montgomery
Evan Oberg
Kenny Reiter
Kyle Schmidt
There are no special exemptions for the freshmen, so they had better play hard every night or they will end up in the HSWCHA.
*And so what if I watch ANTM? It's like a trainwreck, I can't look away!
I'm watching hockey right now. Regular season hockey. (And wow, Parros has quite the mustache. He looks like an extra from Almost Famous.) It's kind of annoying that it has to be the hated Ducks, but it's still hockey. I wonder if my dear friends from the dormant Nottingham Pandas site have managed to get tickets to the sold out games in London. I also wonder if maybe they have quit enjoying hockey and gone back to football, or Footballers Wives.
The Bulldogs still have just under two weeks to go until their season gets started, and let me tell you, I am SICK AND TIRED of hearing people saying they are SO EXCITED for NEXT weekend. Screw you all.
I have been networking quite a bit lately. In addition to the WIB from a few weeks ago, I had a conversations with Duluth radio hick Bruce Ciskie, and rage-filled blogger Donald Dunlop. Bruce thinks tDogs are going to be awesome this year and finish much higher than expected because everyone else is going to suck more than expected. Donald thinks soccer is awesome and baseball is all about people scratching themselves out of boredom. As you can see, some discussions were more valuable than others.
There are things I'm going to write about in the next few weeks, but information is pretty limited and I'll have to wait until the season really gets underway before this blog really kicks into high gear. Relatively speaking.
TWELVE MORE DAYS!
Please note: you will not be seeing the Grand Folks Herald WCHA Coaches' Poll on RWD. Please visit one of the MANY fine blogs in my links section to see what those drunks think their teams are going to do.
RWD's Head LaP Watchdog over at Wild Puck Banter wrote a little ditty on why he hates the Gophers. I encourage my readers to go forth and multiply the reasons for hating those varmints.
As a writer for the premier blog in college hockey, I am often invited to engagements in the college hockey world. I was a keynote drinker at the RCBF '07, moderator for Dinner with the Legends, and now, panelist at the Minnesota Chapter of the WIB convention. The WIB convention is not, as you would expect, a Wine In Box convention (I stopped attending those in college), but is the Women in Blogging convention.
And by that, I mean Let's Go Mavs and Win Twins (along with their personal body guards) visited me at my place of employment.
Topics of the WIB Convention included:
Hotties and How To Rate Them
Who's Hot? Hottiewatch 07
We're Dumb Girls Who Don't Know Anything About Anything
Like, Oh My God
I Don't Know What Satire Is
Jersey Chasing Techniques
You know, because that's all we care about. Right?
We actually talked about the Twins game they had just come from, LGM's interactions with various Mavs players, my careful avoidance of any interaction with any Bulldogs players, the inept WCHA standings predictions of the Great Unwashed USCHO posters, how LGM should go about getting a date with Donald, that weird racist diatribe that was left as a comment on both of our blogs (possible by a certain blogger I will not name), weird fans, and some other topics.
We also talked about stereotyping. It was a timely topic, as they informed me of a comment that was left on another site in response to a silly comment I made. I was excited to go home and read this comment, because there is nothing I enjoy more than seeing what people think about me. ME! The most interesting person in the world! This person was really concerned about my personal life. S/he wrote "Running with the dogs- you need to switch to women's hockey because you blogs are as boring as women's hockey. Great, let's hear about the cutie report. PS- Get a date once for once and stop writing about stuff that you would expect from a high schooler."
That's awesome. I didn't know anyone cared so much about me that they were concerned about my social life. I have definitely reached a new level. I'm also wondering if maybe this person wants a date with me, but doesn't know how to ask. I'll have to politely decline. I don't know why anyone would be interested in an old hag who stalks barely-legal hockey players, but I'm flattered at the overture! (I should add that by writing about hotties, I am just giving the people what they want! Do you know how mean people come here by searching for "[Your player here] hot?" Even the ugly guys are sometimes listed!)
Overall, this adds to the list of bloggers I have actually met. It's a short list: Ciskie, LGM, DG, WT, Dirty, Eliot Olshanksy, MEg, and Booster. Oh, I kind of met the guy from tSecond Best Feeling in tWorld, but not really. Others, take note: get on my list. I am funny. Despite what that comment said.
September 2, 2004. A date that will die in obscurity.
As always, I totally forgot to mark the RWD Dogiversary. 3 freaking years, people, can you stand it? And still, no one reads this thing.
This is my fourth season of covering the Bulldogs. When I first started the site, optimism abounded among the Bulldog faithful. We had a veteran squad that had been in the Frozen Four five months prior. We had a very hott captain. I thought I was going to attend a lot of Bulldogs games*. And I had just discovered a freshman named Mike Curry.
We've got a lot of juniors this year, but they aren't particularly playoff-tested. Our assistant captain looks like a serial killer. I'll probably only make a few games this year. And yet, there's always optimism at the start of the season. Just look at Donald, even The Grinch can be optimistic about his Seawolves. I'm ready for the season to start, and I'm ready to see hella wins this year. LET'S GO 'DOGS!!!!!!!!!
*HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Okay, so I underestimated my readership by, like, 2 people. Sorry, RW77. I can't count that high on one hand.
Recently, Interested Parties contacted me via covert communications to ask if I would be doing a hottie preview this year. After the request was filtered through the Canadian-to-Normal-English translat-o-matic, I nearly tore my hair out of my head at the mere memory of what I went through last year with my ten team whirlwind WCHA hottie preview. Dear god, the ugliness. Also, it totally made me look like a loser jersey-chasing fan-girl. I may be a loser and a total fan-girl, but I AM NOT CHASING JERSEYS. If I found myself in proximity to a jersey, I would be running the other way. I stalk from afar, comrades.
But yet, as I get so very, very few requests from my readers, and most of those requests are to stop blogging and die, so when a real request reaches me, I'm more than happy to finally have something to freakin' write about oblige. This year, instead of doing tGtBatA, I'll be doing something different. I give you:
The Dow Jones Memorial Hottie Stock Report
This year, in an attempt to be a kinder person (and I know Satan just saw a few snowflakes falling when I wrote that), instead of labeling people as Ugly or Heinous or, rarely, Not Ugly, I'll be using relative terms such as Less Uggo or More Uggo, as compared to last year. If I wanted to be nicer, I would maybe say Less Hott or More Hott, but that is a pretty big if, folks.
Freshman Class
(obvs. freshmen have no comparison from last year, but I couldn't exclude them. We will just say they are all hotter, because becoming a D1 hockey player makes you hotter, even if you're Colby Genoway, Ugliest Man Ever.)
Rob Bordson: Well, hello, lovah. If every hockey player looked like you, I would do an All-WCHA Hottie Preview.
Cody Danberg: Cody totally wants to sell me something. I see he's an undecided major. Ooh, ooh! Cody! Major in marketing or something!
Justin Fontaine: Justin is rocking the SJP hair from Sex and the City.
Chad Huttel: I don't know if it's my computer or the picture, but Chad's hair is totally pixellated or something. It looks like Larry decided to Photoshop in some raindrops or something. His hair is as dewy as grass in the morning.
Mike Montgomery: Mike looks like he is hiding something, both from the expression on his face, and from the lack of bio. I see he is from Lino Lakes. Maybe he is a prison escapee. Monte, get on that bio (although Monte will write that he is the next Crosby).
Evan Oberg: Evan appears to have just removed swim goggles. His face is very creased. He also looks like a guy I really liked in junior high, so we have an instant rapport.
Kenny Reiter: For a non-Robby Nolan goalie, Kenny is not bad. Sunburned, but not bad. Next time, smile, honey.
Kyle Schmidt: Kyle is possibly Mike Montgomery's partner in crime. He is so plotting something. I the plot is growing his hair out. Ladies love the curls.
Sophomore Class
Drew Akins: Drew is MORE HOTT. He looks like he wants to kill me, but hey, get in line, pal.
Jordan Fulton: Jordy is MORE HOTT. He must have read my criticism from last year, and has a five o'clock shadow to try to make him look older. Shout out to me!
Logan Gorsalitz: MORE HOTT. Logan is looking fiiiiiiiine, awww yeah. And no one paid me to say that. Although I do take Porsches as currency. This is one instance in which Not Smiling is acceptable.
Trent Palm: LESS HOTT. The chin is too Jay Leno for me.
Chase Ryan: MORE HOTT. Chase has discovered the beautiful skin under his acne with Proactiv Solutions.
Alex Stalock: LESS HOTT. The pre-mutton chops are weird, and worse than regular mutton chops.
Junior Class
Andrew Carroll: MORE HOTT. He, too, is showing the scruff to mature his face a little.
Jay Cascalenda: MORE HOTT. The spikes aren't so scary this year.
Jason Garrison: MORE HOTT. Like, potential All-Hottie Team hott.
Michael Gergen: MORE HOTT. Whoa, mama. I need a cigarette.
Matt Greer: MORE HOTT. Um, I don't know. Work on that tie knot, sailor.
Nick Kemp: MORE HOTT. Although, he has a near mullet. See a doctor about that, sweetie.
Josh Meyers: EVEN. Didn't he have longer hair last year? Bring that back.
MacGregor Sharp: I DON'T KNOW. I can't decide. He is weirdly morphing into another Bulldog player from a few years ago, but I can't quite figure out who. I'll have more on this later.
Senior Class
Mike Curry: MORE HOTT. He is less Cusack-esque this year. However, he looks toasted. Nicely toasted.
Travis Gawryletz: MORE HOTT. I wrote an essay about this picture called Two Treatises on Gawryletz, but I will not post it here, as it is longer than War and Peace. I guess I wouldn't say that morphing into the Charles Manson of werewolves is actually hott, he looks so damn awesome I must give him props.
Matt McKnight: EVEN. Fearless Leader looks the same every year. If you recall, I had to check last year to make sure he had not re-used his sophomore photo. This year I didn't have that problem, as he is def. wearing something different.
Nate Ziegelmann: EVEN. I have a feeling that by the time he is 50, Ziggy will actually look like Ziggy the comic strip character.
OVERALL, it looks to be a bull market for this year's Bulldogs. Yum!
Do you know how many posts I write while driving? I would say that about 75% of my non-recap related posts are started while driving in rush hour traffic. There are also quite a few posts that I write in my car that don't make it onto the site because I forget about them, or get a better idea, or they are boring (more boring than normal, I mean), or I'm too busy stuffing my face, or whatever. Anyway, composing posts while driving is very theraputic with me. It helps me deal with the BLINDING RAGE I feel toward other drivers. I have to do something when commercials are on the radio and I can't rock out to Toto's "Africa."
So, today I had a little driving experience that I guess, in a Six Degrees of Separation sort of way, is relevant to this site. (God, I am really stretching it here, but I can't neglect my five readers! I love you guys! And I can list you: LGM, WinTwins, Goon, Donald, and FHG. NOTE THAT I CAN'T EVEN COUNT ON MY FREAKING PARENTS TO READ THIS THING. Why do I even bother? *******SHAMELESS PLEA FOR VALIDATION**********) I was trying to get somewhere, and some jerks would not let me merge off of 94E at my exit, and then I barely made it to the next exit, and then I was in on the UMTC campus, and NO ONE THERE CAN DRIVE WORTH CRAP. Seriously. And people also suck at walking. And parallel parking. I should seriously drive a tank, because then if I want to merge, I will just put my blinker on and people will move, or else I will just run over them. And I will also run over pedestrians and parallel parkers.
Moral of the story: Gopher fans suck in all forms of traffic.
Seriously, when is hockey going to start? I am lonesome for it. Some radio station was giving away Wild tix for some time this month, so there's hope, but seriously. I MISS HOCKEY. I also miss the cool weather that comes along with hockey, because my fab car overheats when I get stuck in traffic, so while I was creeping through Dinkytown, I was blasting my heater and swearing at people. I need the weather to cool down about 10 degrees so when I go for a run, it doesn't feel like a freaking Death March. I also miss hockey-related news. Nothing is going on. I guess tDECC is getting a new floor, which will make for some better ice. This is fab, since our ice usually has the consistency of an Icee, without being as tasty. Also, Ciskie has started updating his old blog, but I am not going to change the link until A.) he informs me it's a permanent change and B.) he quits writing conference previews for college football. Ugggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggh. But, because I am nice (yeah, right), I am linking.
Okay, enough of this. I've lost steam. Goodnight, all.
You know, just like the Teamsters.
While I am fairly certain all is not quiet on the Bulldog front, with school starting very soon and everything, my spy net hasn't caught a whole lot worth sharing. School is starting for ME in a very short period of time, and unfortunately that's going to frequently conflict with my quality time in front of my computer listening to Ciskie and flailing wildly in panic. The good news here is, that significantly decreases the chances I will stroke out during the season. This doesn't indicate a decrease in the quality of my BRILLIANT POSTING on this site, but rather a need for some serious creativity on those days when I'll be missing the broadcasts. (Did you know that with Replay Radio, you can listen to your program any time, day or night? BECAUSE I SURE KNEW THAT AFTER LAST SEASON. It is burned into my brain.)
If there are any other fellow Lazy and Surly Bulldog fans out there, please contact me about contributing to the site. There are many ways people can contribute to this site: photography, web design (ha!), game recaps, interviews, opinion pieces, modern art, historical articles, scouting reports, gourmet recipes, article ideas, epic poems written in iambic pentameter, publicity, hilarious Photoshop creations, gossip, or whatever you can dream up inside that head of yours. Please note that if you make a mistake in your spelling or grammar, I will warn you once by chopping off your hand, but the second time, I will be forced to kill you. This site has high standards.
I'm fairly certain no one's interested in stepping up to the plate, but I just thought I'd throw that out into the ether and see what happened.
And now, for a Major Concern. The UMD Hockey site ran a blurb on Fearless Leader Matt McKnight recently, mostly discussing his election as captain for the second year in a row. That's not the concern. HERE is the concern:McKnight will enter his farewell collegiate season ranking first among current Bulldogs in career scoring (53 points) and games played (99). Last winter, the Halkirk, Alberta native was hobbled for nearly a quarter of the season with an arm injury, and wound [up] mustering just nine points (four goals and five assists) in 29 outings.
Okay. I knew things were bad, but good lord. Our top returning scorer is a guy who was injured for a good portion of the season last year? Is anyone else a little scared? Of course, I know that there are more than a few guys on the team that are capable of so much more than they achieved last year, points-wise, we're bringing in some great new freshmen, and Mike Curry will continue his ascent toward Scoring Animal, so I have that to look forward to. I also know that in years past we have returned some high-scoring talent and seen the team underperform BIG TIME, so one can hardly project numbers for one season using the numbers from the previous season.
Let's fall back on a platitude here. Time will tell. Coach says we're gonna finish in the top five. College Hockey News says we'll be in the bottom five. Someone's gotta be right.
Just... hurry up, hockey. I'm sick of waiting.
Okay, yes, I do realize I went to Duluth over a week ago, but I've been tired, people. Give a girl a break.
FIRST OF ALL, we must discuss the incredible 36.3 miles per gallon I got in my lovely and amazing Saturn, which also did not overheat at all. Brilliant. I guess that's all the discussion that is needed, except to say STOP DRIVING FREAKING HUMMERS AND SUVS AND CRAP LIKE THAT. Jeez. I sound like a freaking hippie. And that makes me feel dirty.
Okay, so last Sunday I jumped in the Wheels of Death and zipped up to Duluth (a bit behind schedule, but what's new?) I can only go so long without a.) visiting Duluth and b.) talking Bulldog hockey with a real live Bulldog fan. So I decided to visit the RWD Mobile Reporter, Gramps, as well as Gram (collectively known as The Folks).
After arriving on campus at tUMD, I thought that I saw a few Bulldog hockey players, but I might have just been projecting. Besides, short of a player coming up to me, introducing himself, and reminding me that he plays for tDogs, I wouldn't have a clue. So, no chance for any kind of stalking. One of the great tragedies of our time, no doubt.
So, after arriving at Heaney Hall to rendez-vous with the Mobile Reporter, we climbed into The Mothership Lincoln and headed down to Canal Park. There, we ran into a very rich old codger acquaintance of Gramps's (hint: there's a hockey arena named after him), and ended up in some exceptionally long movie about the Lighthouses of Isle Royale down at the Army Corps of Engineers museum. My god. It was so long. There should have been some sort of warning. We also visited the Duluth Pack store where I got some most excellent accessories (apparently I am either Bill or Ted now). We rounded out the day with a visit to the Lakeview Castle for "the best walleye" that the Folks had had "all summer." (I did not go to the Sports Garden. I'd never go there without FHG.)
Now, for the actual hockey content. We discussed the television situation in Duluth. According to Gramps, when they moved here from New Hampshire, they were told that the whole city essentially revolved around hockey. Obvs. there was nothing else to do in Duluth in those days. tUMD wasn't even in the WCHA back then, though they became a D-1 independent just after the Folks moved up to Duluth (or, as Gram thought of it at first, the end of the world). Already hockey fans from growing up watching high school hockey in Rhode Island and Massachusetts (yes, 65 years ago, they had high school hockey in New England), the Folks had season tickets to tUMD hockey for decades, starting at the old Curling Club (scene of excessive fraternity hijinx from other RWD correspondents, including former RWD Overseas Correspondent L and RWD East Coast correspondent H) and continuing once tDECC was built. Even the Most Excellent former Matriarch of the RWD family (my great-grandmother) had a season ticket for a few years. The RWD family is in its fourth generation of Bulldog hockey support.
Highlights from our conversation:
1. Gramps's friend was the guy who posted on the DNT message board that we need to fire Sandelin because tDogs have not had a winning season since '92. I asked him to remind said friend that tDogs did not have a losing season when they went to the Frozen Four.
2. Speaking of firing Sandelin, Gramps is not in favor. He believes (and I agree) that we need a coach that is either Canadian or has mucho Canadian connections, because we can't effectively recruit an entire competitive team out of the Northland. This is not a new revelation.
3. As a matter of fact, Gramps cancelled his season tickets one year when tUMD hired... um... what's his name... that fella from Grand Rapids whose name escapes me at this moment. Then, during some sort of scrimmage, he witnessed a young walk-on named Brett Hull show off his mad skillz, and promptly retrieved his season tickets, because he didn't want to miss out on the Brett Hull show.
4. During the Brett Hull years, Hull was on one line and current tUMD coach/party animal Bill Watson was on another, but they were always paired together during a 4 on 4 situation. According to Gramps, a 4 on 4 situation was "a goal for UMD" almost without fail. It's kind of a shame that I was too young to know what the heck was going on back then. It's kind of a shame our special teams situation has been a bit of a pain in the butt the past few years, especially 4 on 4.
5. Under the reign of terror of "So Long Ralphie" as they used to sing to coach Romano, tDogs employed a very Lemaire-esque defencive plan: get a 2 goal lead, and sit on the puck. Waste time. Don't even bother to do anything offensive, just hold the lead. It was not a very good strategy, evidently, nor was it very popular with the fans. Of course, the best way to get rid of a coach is to promote him. (Note: Romano was, according to my sources, a most excellent A.D. He just "wasn't a hockey coach.")
Though it was great to discuss hockey for awhile, it also reminded me of how much I miss the game. And, of course, of how excruciating it is to try to come up with content for this site during the long off-season.
I should note that tDogs selected their captains for 2007-08 at some point, though I was totally unaware. There was no press release (LARRY I AM LOOKING IN YOUR DIRECTION), and I just happend to look at the "fast facts" link on tUMD's website. RWD Guy Matt McKnight is our Fearless Leader for the upcoming season, with Andrew Carroll as his Boris and Travis Gawryletz as his Natasha (these roles are interchangeable, I'm not trying to say anything about anyone's masculinity here). tDogs have an opportunity to build on last year's, um, success if they can get strong leadership out of their juniors and seniors. Last year's upperclassmen really stepped it up and elevated their own play as well as that of their teammates, and I'll be expecting that again. I hope that Knighter and Carroll have full, healthy seasons this year, as a shoulder injury and post-concussive issues, respectively, sidelined the poor guys.
Look for a RWD press release in the near future naming My Guys for the upcoming season.
Stay off the roads Sunday, because RWD is invading Duluth. Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!
REAL LIVE ACTUAL NEWS! I can't even stand it!
First of all, the BIGGEST news of all is that tDogs have brought in Camrose Kodiak Evan Oberg a year early. This is gigantor news, as Oberg is an outstanding defenceman with some offensive power. Oberg joins forwards Rob Bordson, Cody Danberg, Kyle Schmidt, Mike Montgomery, and Justin Fontaine, defenceman Chad Huttel, and goalie Kenny Reiter as the incoming Bulldogs. Did I or did I not predict tDogs would bring in another player? I am a genuis! (Although it was pretty obvs.)
Secondly, UND Blogger and RWD friend Goon has adopted a human child to go along with his dog child Dakota. No word on how Dakota is handling the usurping of his position.
Thirdly, you can read a little profile of Drew Akins over at INCH's A-Z feature. Though he is not one of my guys, I am a huge Drew A. fan. Note that the "B" profile guy is a faux-Dog.
Okay, that's about it. I don't know what else to post until Money gets bored and starts another topic on tPB.
(In this case, state meaning mode or condition of being, not one of the constituent units of a nation having a federal government.)
What's going on in Duluth?
Seriously.
3 years ago, the Bulldogs went to the Frozen Four. Now, the broadcast has been dumped by WDIO-TV. (See the DNT article here.) I know we sucked hardcore the past few years, but I didn't think it was that hardcore. Of course, it's not like ticket sales were any better than the TV ratings.
The WDIO-TV station manager, Dave Poirer, says "Advertisers aren’t interested in supporting UMD hockey broadcasts." Wow. That's a powerful statement. That shows that the community businesses in Duluth are seeing that Bulldog hockey isn't reaching enough of an audience to warrant their money. (I should point out that the article says that advertisers are turning to the internet instead. I think the idea that internet advertising is more effective than television or radio advertising is a fallacy. I understand that it's much cheaper to have some robot Photoshop you a print ad than it is to hire actual humans to record a commercial. However, as a consumer of the internet, television, and to a lesser extent, radio, I have never clicked on a banner ad in my freaking life, except by accident, but I am occasionally swayed by actual commercials, mostly because they are much less avoidable, and then I suddenly find myself wanting a DQ Blizzard RIGHT FREAKING NOW. I mean, Rhino Lining gets free advertising from me(!) from my stat counter at the bottom of this page, and they haven't sponsored great hockey hits in like two years, but I remember Kerry Rodd saying "Beau Geisler with a Rhino Lining hit!" etc. And who among us did not dream of owning an ARGO after seeing the UAA broadcast? But no one asked me, did they? I'm only a CONSUMER!) In other words, less people care about Bulldog hockey, and it shows. Evidently, the station lost money on the broadcasts, although I don't know if that's in comparison with what they would have made if they had shown reruns of Walker: Texas Ranger or if it costs more to produce the broadcast than they were making in actual dollars. (REMEMBER, I am your consumer advocate! Always on the lookout for faux-Dogs and television station propaganda!)
The bright spot is that a deal is in the works for the games to be shown on Charter Cable instead. Charter already shows games from other WCHA teams, and seriously, even the fat cats like the Gophers, Badgers, and Fighting Sioux are on cable. And really, only trolls under bridges don't have cable, and they can always listen to Bruce Ciskie if they can get reception. I'm sure that the RWD team will probably be disheartened to hear this, as they always enjoy watching tDogs during their deer-hunting pilgrimage, but after last year's Gopher debacle, I think it's probably better for the health of the RWD correspondents if they don't see those games when they are deep into their brandy slushes or whatever the heck they are drinking up there. (tDogs are actually off on deer hunting opener this year, anyway.)
A forum on the DNT website shows public opinion on WDIO's move, as does tPenalty Box forum. (It should be noted that the first posted on the DNT site, "Donna C." is NOT me, but I was totally creeped out by this faux-me and for a moment thought I might have posted in my sleep, then thought someone was impersonating me, but then I became rational again.) Fans on tPB seem cautiously optimistic about the Charter Cable deal, but disheartened by the greater implication of waning support in the community. Over at the DNT, it's a different story, with people preferring college football, hating Duluth, hating Sandelin, hating the President, calling tDogs terrorists, reminding us there is "parody" in the league (ALIVE AND WELL ON RWD!!!!!!!!!), insulting the student section, reminding us we haven't had a winning season since 1992 (????), complaining about oil prices, calling the Gophers worthless (superb!), and supporting the Dogs. It's kind of all over the map, with no real consensus.
My personal opinion on the matter (WHICH YOU WERE ALL DYING FOR, I KNOW, YOU'RE JUST SITTING THERE BITING YOUR NAILS IN SUSPENSE) is that the TV situation isn't the problem. It's sad they got dumped by WDIO, but it seems like Charter will come in and work things out. The real issue is what troubles me: support in the community is waning, and that is sad. And I don't understand it, either. It's not like the Bulldogs have gone from perennial contenders to bottom-feeders. The true Bulldog understands there's more ebb than flow to the Bulldogs's season. Hello, the true Minnesota sports fan IN GENERAL understands this, as we have suffered through the same woes throughout the years with the Twins, the Vikings, the North Stars, the Wild, those basketball teams, etc. It's just how we are brought up. We endure the chill of the winters and the agony of defeat. Sure, you could say Gopher hockey is consistently successful, but really, that's a very small part of Minnesota sports. And then I'd counter with GOPHER FOOTBALL and GOPHER BASKETBALL and then you would be very quiet.
This also brings back the DECC issue. The community supported the projected, and the legislature killed it. That's pretty depressing. But let's pretend that tDECC actually gets built in the near future. Is it going to revitalize the community, bringing people back to the Bulldogs games, bringing more top recruits to the team, and bringing us a NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP? Or is it going to be a novelty that wears off after a season or two, leaving the city and the team back at square one, with a huge bill to pay? Yikes. Now I'm starting to sound like a Doomsday prophet. That's not going to happen. The Dogs will rebound from these past few seasons, we'll be back at the Final Five and back in the NCAA tournament within a few years. DECC or no DECC, TV or no TV, hell or highwater. And THAT is the end of the story.
Take care of yourselves, and each other.
One of the great things about having my Rhino-Lining Hits counter (since the counter doesn't make sense anymore, since Rhino Lining evidently doesn't sponsor the bone-crushing hits tDogs dish out anymore) is seeing how people get to this lovely site. Most of the time, they're coming here from SiouxSports or USCHO or one of the other blogs, or for searching for something like "Bulldog Hockey" or "Runnin' with the Dogs." You know, things that make sense.
And then... well, RWD is a crossroads for many, many different searches on the internet that have nothing to do with hockey, or something to do with hockey, or something strange to do with hockey. Here are some examples:
Player-related
crazy canucks gorsalitz
robbie earl handsome
jordan parise hot
pictures of hothead naked ice borer
mike curry baseball
russ romaniuk game worn jerseys
jason garrisoncute
matt niskanen engineer
jason garrisonsexy
drew stafford shirtless
ryan berry shirtless photos
jonathan toews beer bong
josh meyers dimples
matt mcknight's cfl history
travis gawryletz do girls like him?
travis gawryletz hot or not
Semi-hockey-related
anthony lapanta hair
stearns county syndrome
glen sonmor punch fan bench pic
troy jutting facebook
What the???
liquor dont drink because it isnt heatly
words puzzle the wild dingo
i didn't even know where west
double leather sole mukluks
jack daniel golfing caps
fosters home for imaginary friends big fat awesome house party
david james elliott blog
john mitchell sonmor
david james elliott shirtless photos
picture of a egg getting sucked into a bottle
capeway bulldogs, ma
if i'm the only one i'll shut up
guffers animals pictures
carly ward sammy's wood fired pizza
kyle lohse gay
computer screeens for dogs
hooray huzzah etymology
hillion box dog
Are you scratching your head in confusion yet? There are some weird people out there.
********EDIT*********
DEAR GOD, WHAT SICK PERSON IS SEARCHING FOR "JASON GIAMBI SHIRTLESS"?????????????????
You may have forgotten that RWD exists. You may have forgotten the laughter, the tears, the unchecked rage. But, because I am not above the cheesy "clip show" style post, here are
The Top Ten RWD Posts Of All Time Until Better Ones Come Along
10. UMD Announces New Assistant Coach
9. No Joy in Mudville
8. The Gauntlet: Public Servant Edition
7. Diamonds and Pucks
6. The Teddy Bear Affair
5. 100 Years Behind the Mask
4. When You Say Wisconsin, You've Said Too Much
3. The Gauntlet: Denver Edition
2. Save the Children
1. Fearing the Reaper
You know you love it.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled non-update with an actual entry. Sorry for the convenience.
Via my dear friend Goon's blog, I discovered this article by Fighting Sioux beat writer Brad Schlossman (also known as That Rat Bastard That Doesn't Link To Me) discussing Brian Lee's departure from the Fighting Sioux.
Okay, I may not exactly have my finger on the pulse of college hockey, but seriously, what the mother is going on over in Grand Forks?
Let me give you an example of what some lovely folks are saying about Brian (spelling and grammar are the authors's own):
"hes a fugly dude and see yaaaaaaaaaaa" (Okay, in the photo on Goon's site, he does look like he's wearing purple lipstick and yellow eyeliner, but jeez.)
"he peaked very early around 15/16 and has been the same player since, maybe the ahl will help him more but he will get his ass kicked for sure if he prances around the ice like he did sometimes"
"he isnt ready for the next level, he just wanted to get out of school for sure, he wasnt well liked in the locker room, that happens sometimes, he had a HUGE ego and head around grand forks so that didnt help him at all which is his fault for being a jackass to regular old fans"
"I wish Brian well, but am not sorry to see him go. I would not characterize Brian as a UND standout. Ever since he was chosen to participate in the first World Juniors, people's perceptions of Brian's abilities exceeded his subsequent play - his performance seldom justified his 'reputation'. Brian too often coasts (skate-coast, skate-coast) - doesn't seem to have the fire/drive/passion required to be REALLY successful at the D1 (not to mention NHL) level. Part of Brian's legacy at UND will forever be the 'Blake Wheeler goal.'"
"A few years in the minors and a few fights will be good for Brian, who was one of the softest players ever to wear the kelly green."
"I'm sure he is a nice guy, however I fealt like he was a liability to the team when he was on the ice. To be fair I had felt the same about Finley at one point and time, but Finley has shown improvement throughout his career at UND. The first half of the year we had a better record with Foyt playing D then we did with Lee."
"Lee played like a poke-checking prima donna on more shifts than not for 2 years. He rarely went into the corner first, but was happy to 'punish' a braver forward if he thought he could get away with it...usually followed by a boarding/elbowing/roughing call."
"Lee is going to get lit up like a real life version of 'Youngblood' without the triumphant return to the team after his 2 years." (This person actually wrote a series of short stories entitled The Chronicles of Lee and posted the entire thing on Brad's site.)
All right, then. To be fair, there were certainly posts defending Brian and wishing him well, and there were some that were at least constructive in their criticism, but I have been a member of the SiouxSports board for a long time, and I'm pretty shocked at some of the things people would say about the poor guy (and about Joe Finley). I guess as long as there are players, there will be critics, but there is a line that people have crossed, that I have only crossed in discussion of 1. Those horrible people from St. Cloud 2. The New York Yankees 3. Troy Riddle and Ryan Potulny. I've been critical of my 'Dogs from time to time, but never to the point where I have wished someone would go away and then publicly repeated that over and over again. And really, after the past 2 seasons we've had, I could probably be more critical, if not for two reasons: I'm not close enough to the game to comment on a day-in, day-out basis, and I just don't want to say anything really mean about any of those guys. I mean, the HSWCHA does exist, but I haven't put anyone in it in a long time. I didn't even get mad when Nisky scored on Johnson down in Mankato. I just felt bad for him.
I think Goon is right when he says we've lost our civility. I mean, it's one thing to scream "You m-fing something or other" at a hockey game where everyone can see you (because really, I'm not above doing that), but it's another thing to go on the internet under some silly made-up name and take your frustration with the world out on some guy who made a mistake. Come on, people. Get a grip.
Rhino-lining hits!
